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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

AIBU to not let bitey cat sit on my lap?

13 replies

RubbishMantra · 28/03/2017 22:00

What do you do? Little M's a pretend biter, like mouthing and lick your hand. However MCat's an actual biter. Strikes like a snake.

He'll do it when very relaxed. I know to only touch his head when he demands fuss. Then he appears to be shocked about biting me and scarpers. Mostly though, he just carries on purring, and lies there next to my bleeding hand. I've just acquired a fetching new bite-mark.

I would love to be comfortable with him sitting on my lap, but it ALWAYS ends up in me being bitten.

If I put this on AIBU I'd be told to LTB

OP posts:

Toddlerteaplease · 28/03/2017 22:32

Well he is clearly unhappy with Little M's presence in the hide. Therefore Little M must must be rehomed to me immediately. Sorry, not helpful!

Toddlerteaplease · 28/03/2017 23:09

*house!

Original poster

RubbishMantra · 29/03/2017 00:43

Oh no, you're a cat whisperer, and sowed the seeds of discontent into MCat's ear, in order to make your evil genius plan come to fruition, of little M coming to live with you, Toddler!

OP posts:

HemanOrSheRa · 29/03/2017 09:24

Frankie is a bitey boy. I like to think that it's passion because he adores me and cannot contain himself, because he does the bite then look of too . If he comes to me for cuddles and starts his bitey nonsense I hide my hands and tell him 'NO!' He then starts butting me for attention so I tell him 'Only if you stop being horrid to Mummy and start being a Good Boy' .

ASqueakingInTheShrubbery · 29/03/2017 09:26

My Bite'n'Shite is about 15 now. My hands have become very tough. I accept the wounds as the price of his love.

TondelayaDellaVentamiglia · 29/03/2017 09:35

We had a biteybastard....big orange and white fake norwegian forest cat...he just had not been well socialised as a kitten

He more or less grew out of it by about 12 or maybe we just got better at reading the imminent bitey signs?

He also was horrified by himself and his own sharpness, and he'd seem genuinely sorry after.

ThomasandFriends · 29/03/2017 10:36

My previous cat used to bite, though never drew blood so I wasn't too bothered. What I'd find, though, was if I relaxed my hand when it was in her mouth she then wouldn't have a grip and I could take it out unscathed to her look of utter confusion. Was highly amusing!

saladsmoothie · 29/03/2017 18:24

My biter (yep - like a snake, perfect description) seems to be growing out of it a bit... might just be wishful thinking, he's very nearly 2. Everyone in the family has scars, and my friends are terrified of him. But I don't think he means it maliciously.

Mermaidinthesea · 01/04/2017 10:32

I have one too. Bluebell was a London feral and has never forgotten it. One of my patients rescued her and brought her to the countryside but soon regretted it. I said I'd have her as I've had lots of ferals previously.
She is mostly ok but occasionally.........
The other night I must have accidentally prodded her in my sleep, and she turned round and attacked me like a cobra.
I leapt up and banged my head on the reading lamp on the headboard and now my hand is swelling up and I need antibiotics.
She was ever so sorry, rubbed up against me for about an hour!!!!
Most of the time she is great but you never stroke without looking right at her.

AIBU to not let bitey cat sit on my lap?

ifonly4 · 01/04/2017 17:06

Firstly, it may be that you have to accept him on his own terms - ie only stroke him when he wants it and look out for the warning signs he's had enough - for instance, our lad would always shake his head a little. We had one that hardly sat on us and we had to watch out for swipes and teeth. Moving forward 17 years, he did go through a phase of being a lap cat but rarely swipes or bites, in fact, he demands attention by tapping us. If you can hang in there and let him be himself, hopefully he will relax a bit more. I forgot to say, we only stroked him while we were in front of him and he could see what we were intending to do, we never surprised him from behind and he hated being stroked along the sides.

Original poster

RubbishMantra · 01/04/2017 22:30

The bugger sits on my lap though, purring and demanding fuss. Then strikes. I'm v. careful not to touch him anywhere but his head. He doesn't give any cues with his body language at all.

Apparently they can feel threatened, being the little fuckers predators they are when they get too relaxed. Then snap out of that state to find they're sitting on another predator's lap (humans) which makes them , so they have go at you.

MCat wasn't socialised well as a kitten, poor lad.

OP posts:

HemanOrSheRa · 01/04/2017 23:37

Come on now Mantra, remember, You Are The Mammy And You Are In Charge .

Allergictoironing · 02/04/2017 07:10

"You Are The Mammy And You Are In Charge"

Ha ha ha ha ha. It took me about 2 months of being owned by my cats for it to be absolutely clear that they are the ones in charge - and I barely saw them for the first month

DSiS's cat is a bit like this; requests fuss then bites when he's had enough. MOSTLY he is quite slow & gentle about it, but occasionally he does the snake thing. Again it's only the head that you can stroke when he is in the mood, anywhere else and blood will flow. Unless you are her son, who can do loads more with him, but we suspect he may be part cat himself .

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