Kittens going up chimney - ideas needed

[665TheNeighbourOfTheBeast]

We have two kittens who seem determined to go up the largish open flu above one of our fires
I have tried a fireguard - but it looks horrible - doesn't fit and just gets pushed out of the way even when wired to the grate
I have eyed up the chimney balloon things and cant bring myself to spend nearly £30 on something that looks like it would get popped by sharp little claws almost immediately
so we are currently living with a pillow rammed into the opening..it looks ridiculous.
We don't use the fire much so its really there to look good - and it doesn't - and I cant see it doing so for...ahh - ages.
I thought I would turn to your collective wisdom as I'm sure someone else has solved this before me - but I cant think what to do !...

He was raised by a coal fire. It's just everything else fire related he's a bit dim about.

It's probably all the times he's clunked his head playing by the skirting boards.

Ah - then a proper fire he would probably simply enjoy?

Read them "The Tale of Samuel Whiskers" about what happened to Tom Kitten when he went up the chimney. That will set them straight.

(Sorry, not helpful, but just want to add that our cats did grow out of this.)

Many years ago my dm was puzzled as to why kitten number one was staring at the chimney over the fire she had just lit. Then she heard kitten number 2 meowing. Fire hastily extinguished and a sooty but otherwise unharmed kitten retrieved from a ledge in the chimney. They never did it again but my mum aged about 20 years in 5 minutes.

Oh god I can imagine that. Your poor mum.

wow - who knew there would be so many chimney climbing kitties
and chimney stuffing owners

Only time I've ever had to bathe a cat. Firstcat went up (a cold chimney) white and came down black.