Feeling the guilt...

[NeedACleverNN]

We have taken in a foster dog for MIL and Tootsie is not happy.

She was bought up with dogs before she came here but has obviously forgotten all that and the dog is well used to cats so won't chase her but she's sulking badly.

Managed to coax her out enough for a cuddle but she spent the whole time shaking and glaring at the dog.

She's allowed upstairs but the dog won't be so I'm hoping being able to get away from him will help

What else can I do to help her?

I'd wait out the sulk. If you break out the gourmet & Sheba now you'll never get her off it.

She's enjoying the power of The Sulk over you - looks as if she's forgotten the 'pleasure' of lording it over a dog.

I'd wait her out.

PS - just behave absolutely as usual if you can.

We are acting as normally as we can with a few adjustments
We shut the dog outside whilst she has her food so she knows she's safe and hasn't got to panic

We are going to move her food, water and litter box upstairs so that she has a safe space to go away from the dog and hope she sorts it from there.

As she's only 12 weeks in hoping she will get over it sooner rather than later

Well done.

Is the dog being suitably deferential if they encounter each other?

He tries to push his luck slightly by trying to instigate play but I call him away. I let her tell him off if she feels she needs to and he doesn't retaliate so I hope that helps her security a little bit

It can be a tough life being a dog in a multiple household, right enough. (Ie 'bottom of the heap'. )

Best never leave them alone at the moment, anyway.

Try feeding her with the dog in the room (but on lead or in an enclosure or something). Cats are slaves to their stomachs usually and although they might be huffy about it, with enough coaxing they will start to eat with the dog there, and then they will be associating the dog with good things and begin to feel a lot safer around the dog.

Make sure the cat has plenty ways to escape when you do this as it make them feel safer, and to begin with have the dog further away and calm, and as the cat gets more comfortable you can move a bit nearer.

That's how I introduced my two cats to my dog and now I catch them sleeping back to back fairly often! They all know the cats are the boss and everyone is happy!

I'll try that in a few weeks.
At the moment she will only eat if he's not in her sight line

Lick-e-lix aka kitty crack will make everything good. You might have an addict on your hands though.

We have a bit of progression...till she swiped at him!

Poor dog. He just sat there and let him do it

Which is as it should be........

(She'll become bored with him soon enough with any luck. Not responding should just prove to her that he's a typical big stupid lump dog. )

PS - Personally, I have a great deal of time for dogs but I've never had a cat that had any great regard for them, I'm afraid.

I've had to shut her out the room because whilst he isn't reacting I don't want to push it.

She's really trying to size him up and beat him up. He is being so good. Avoiding eye contact, looking away, ducking and getting as close to the ground whilst she struts her stuff. Then she started going mad and going for him so I've separated them again.

Few more sessions like this and hopefully they will get along ok. Might not be friends but they can at least tolerate each others presence

I've found that you it helps to break up any tension by eg giving the dog regular and really good walks where they can be 'king of the outside' and have lots of attention out there. They seem to then be happy enough inside with Debilcat - knowing that their time will come.

Ignore that stray 'you'.

The dog doesn't like being walked

He isn't used to it so I've got to start trying to get him to do it.
Meanwhile she gets to come to bed with me at night now where she didn't before and she has the whole of upstairs to herself. Dog is NOT allowed Up here full stop

We've always had the bedrooms etc out of bounds to dogs - and the cats come to know that quite quickly.

Maybe post in the Doghouse with regard to the dog if walking is proving a problem?

I've had a dog who didn't like walking before so used to it

I've never had one like that. Maybe it was always having cats around - they couldn't wait to get out!

My jrt who hated walked was an Irish rescue.
We didn't know much about his past but we did know he was petrified of everything including cars.
Ended up buying a dog buggy for him so I could transport him to a quiet and isolated area to be walked. Only then did he enjoy itn

The closet I've had them relaxing in the same space.
Dog need my bottom, cat on shoulders

Big improvement

How long is the foster to be for?

Was supposed till mil found him a new home buuuuuuuuuut........

Ahhhh.

So he's found a new home already has he?