Stupid things your cat does.

[Fluffycloudland77]

Tries to sniff a lit gas fire.

Tries to smell lit candles (theme emerging)

Tries to chew razors (more careful these days)

Our elderly mog likes to go out in the rain and come back in meowing. He then expects to be towelled dry.

He has also started rounding us up in the evening - he likes to make sure we're both in bed before he goes out or sleeps.

He's also 'boss cat' of the street, despite the fact he's not that big, and is 18 years old. He shouts at other cats to intimidate them. It works.

Both of mine make 'I want to go out' noises, and when I open the door, stand and sniff the air for a while, then wander off.....

Bites us awake in the morning, chewing and sucking our fingers

HAS to sleep with someone, usually me, and HAS to be leaning hard against you the whole time

Shouts out "ALLLLO" when he comes in the door

Tries to kill the bottom stair

Will run at, jump up and box visitors. Suddenly! We do have a "Warning Attack Cat On Duty" sign

QOD cat#1 has to sleep either on top of me or leaning up against me at night. He refuses to sleep anywhere else and crys and makes a huge fuss if I won't let him. Oddly enough he manages to sleep all day when I am out at work.

They weigh a flipping ton don't they?

Climbs in big drawer under ds2's bed and gets stuck there all day. Like today!

not so much stupid but Idgie sits on command and 'sits down' (lies down) As well.

My boy cat is currently talking to a bunch of flowers in a vase on the table. He seems to be having quite a chat with it.

I've just looked through Classics and I can't find the link to the competitive cat stupidity thread - could someone please link?

Mine has sniffed candles, fallen off the banister all the way down the stairs (how she managed to balance on it to begin with is beyond me) and fallen in the bath while I was in it. That little episode left me scarred for life (literally - big claw gash in my ankle - OUCH!!). Stupid cat.
I lover her really.

Jacksmania:
Competitive Cat Stupidity.

Jo jo goes to sleep on top of the television and gets so relaxed she falls off then looks round in the hope no one saw her descent , Blue the half siamese sits above me on the sofa and grooms my hair with his teeth , biscuit sits in the window talking to the birds that chattering sound cats make and then cant work out why they wont talk back, Blue also does the let out the front door and straight round to the back door to be let in

issey they sound so lovely! :)

We have two brothers, one very clever and the other deeply stupid. Stupid Cat took a running jump out of a first storey window when he was nine weeks old and landed flat on his face ? we?re still not sure if he is stupid because he jumped, or if he jumped because he is stupid.

He gets loads of attention but makes a convincing show of being sad and neglected (I would say starved and neglected ? but his pendulous belly belies this ? we have to supervise mealtimes now as his default position is face down in his brother?s food bowl. Clever cat is, predictably, rather svelte and subsidises his meals with local wildlife. Stupid cat has not deigned to set foot outside (unless forced so that brother can eat in peace) since the end of summer ? his dainty paws might get cold.

He spends hours snoozing next to us on the sofa, then wanders upstairs and yodels mournfully through every room as if he doesn?t understand where we have gone. Over Christmas he has developed an uncontrollable passion for the leather armchair that has been in our living room since before he was born ? I?m starting to wonder DH has stitched catnip into the lining?.

A few months ago he was bested in a fight by a baby thrush. I walked into the kitchen to the sight of Stupid Cat cowering under a chair a few feet away from one mightily pissed off bird with a tuft of fur in his beak.

Clever Cat's default position is as far away as position, observing Stupid Cat with disdain.

Mine likes to climb up to the top of the bookcase, run along, and then jump down behind the corner piece.

The bookcases cover two walls, and he was getting himself trapped behind them on a daily basis whilst I was out at work before I had to block them off to save him from his own stupidity.

Stupid cats make for the best stories :o

Sits on the upstairs windowsill watching birds, runs downstairs to downstairs windowsill and collides with annoying glass window. Then patrols the windowsill/pounces on his own shadow whilst growling at said birds.

And all the while REFUSING to go outside even when I push him really quite firmly through the front door

I've fosterered a few.

Salem once managed to escape, ran horisontally up the fence and onto the roof (bungalow) which he decided was too high.

Cue meaw get me down, meow don't touch me, eow get me down. My friend had to balance on a plasit chair to get to him and hand him to me.

Once we were all back inside friend gave salem a lecture about if he did it again he would be taking up a new career as violin strings.

Lilly and Tonks loved plastic mice with catnip in, they would just lie in the hall with one each in their mouths, if you tried to move it they would Grrrrr at you, but the grrr would get higher the further you took the mouse, you could almost play a tune.

Tonks also attacked a remote control dalek, a full on attack that involved emerging from behind furniture and knockin the dalec onto its side before holding with front paws and kicking with back legs.

Annie would 'meow' to be let out, but was deaf so her meow was silent. She would open her mouth really loud and eventually just before closed her mouth there would be a quiet 'Ack'.

Beatrice would walk on the curtain rail between two wardrobes - no idea why, probably because she could.

Oh I forgot Martha, she liked to climb into warm car engines from underneath.

Jacob liked to sit on the back of my computer chair and groom me.

I once came home to find a cat in a closed cupboard. And have also been dive bombed from the top of the wardrobe.

One of ours took a running jump at our window sill, mistimed it spectacularly and bounced straight back off the window onto the patio. Same idiot regularly falls off the bed or sofa whilst rolling around too.

Puts things in shoes.
Every time I put shoes/boots on there's a wee treat inside.
At the minute it's quality street wrappers.
But he always makes sure there's something in every shoe or boot that's out.
I once found a small potato in my work boot!

Constantly runs in to the closed conservatory door which I really shouldn't find so amusing but I do
Insists on grooming one specific friend of mine & nobody else
likes to get stuck up trees though only when its dark so you can't see him

Evil Cat (who is actually being really nice all of a sudden am worried) hates the rain. She waits by the back door, I open it. She huffs off, back into the house, waits by the front door until I open it, she then has to check that it is in fact raining at the front of the house, at which point she huffs off upstairs (normally taking a swipe at the other cat or the dog).

Stupid Cat (18 months) loves water, can't get enough of it. Whereas Evil Cat gets upset, he strolls outside and sits on the pavement regardless of it being a light shower or torrential rain . He plays with drips from the tap, sits in the kitchen sink(you know, for fun!) and in the morning, even though he has a litter tray and access to the outside world, rushes to the bathroom to enjoy a morning wee in the bath plug hole while myself or DD are using the loo!

I get through a lot of disinfectant

SC also loves to dribble, when he is at his happiest he drools and drools and drools. Any cuddles are normally done with the safety of an old tea towel between us!

loving reading about all these daft and endearing cats they all sound great

Mine falls down the stairs.

She stretches out on a step and then when rolling over to get more comfortable rolls off the edge.

Does it time after time and every time looks surprised that this is the outcome.

My wonderful, now deceased, cat used to carry socks around in her mouth whilst mewing soulfully. She would nearly always deposit them on the half landing.