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The doghouse

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Original poster

Dog barking - neighbour complaining... what to do?

32 replies

purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 14:03

We have a 16 month old terrier who has some issues with separation anxiety. She's no bother when we're home but when we go out she barks - for context, I'm out most days for around 3 hours, usually in the morning, & maybe one night a week for a maximum of 4 hours. I leave a light on, the radio on a talk station, she has toys to play with and an array of comfy 'safe' places for her to go to. We also have an older dog who is in the same room with her, but she is used to being left and just sleeps when we're out (we have tried leaving them in separate rooms but the younger dog is even worse then).

We don't see our neighbour very often but every time we do (like every couple of months) he mentions the barking again, saying she does it all the time when I'm out & asking when she's going to stop, if we're trying to train her, etc. I've apologised many times and said she's still a puppy/young dog & that I'm trying my best but I can't stay home all the time! I get that it must be annoying for him but it's not at unsociable times and honestly I don't really know what else to do!

Any ideas?!

OP posts:
user1494670108 · 09/03/2018 14:17

You need to take proper advice in getting rid of her separation anxiety.
Crucially, you can't do this by leaving her to bark.
So the first thing is to a arrange that she is not left, it sounds impossible - I did it worth the help of an excellent dog walker/ minder.
Then build up from leaving the room momentarily, to gradually leaving for longer. It needs time, patience, good advice and I found using the presence app on my iPad so I could check my dog when I did leave him, invaluable.
Check out Facebook dog training pants for good advice.
Fwiw I can now leave the dog for a few hours without barking or howling (though the counter surfing is an issue as he's tall!)

Snowmageddon · 09/03/2018 14:21

Your dog is barking for 3 hours a day, sometimes 7 hours per day? I think your neighbour is a bloody saint, to be honest! Do you really think that apologising is going to make up for this constant annoying nuisance, which must be affecting the neighbour every single day?

ANY time of day is an unsociable time for an irritating noise like a dog barking. If you can't keep your dog in a situation where she is happy / not stressed and anxious then you should not have a dog.

BiteyShark · 09/03/2018 14:41

First of all get a camera and see what is happening when you leave. Mine was less than £40 and I get a live feed with sound on my phone (plus I can move it about using my phone).

This will give you a better picture of what is happening. The reason for saying this is mine started with seemingly seperation anxiety after being admitted to the vets for several days. With the camera I was able to see actually he was barking at the window to the back garden so we covered that which helped. The other thing I found was that noises set him off so we put the radio on. The third thing I found was that he hated talk channels and barked all the time but was quiet when we put music channels on. I would never have known this without a camera.

Not sure if you have said but do you walk your dog before leaving her? A tired dog is less likely to bark. If it's during the day pay for daycare of a dog walker whilst you contact a behaviourist to help you solve this.

purits · 09/03/2018 14:45

ANY time of day is an unsociable time for an irritating noise like a dog barking.

I second this. Especially when they set off the rest of the neighbourhood.

Original poster
purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 14:48

Thanks @user1494670108 that's really helpful advice, I will look into how to help her with her separation anxiety. Sounds like some good resources there.

Thanks @snowmageddon I should have said that if I'm out in the morning then I wouldn't go out again in the evening, so never 7 hours, a maximum of 4. It's not every day either that I go out, sometimes I stay home all day. I wouldn't describe him as a saint... he plays his TV at high volume every afternoon/evening, whistles/sings loudly and has a very untidy garden which is overgrowing our fence, is full of rubbish and attracts rats into our garden. We've never complained about any of these things. Do you have any advice other than to get rid of the dog?

OP posts:
Aprilmightmemynewname · 09/03/2018 14:51

If your neighbour is a generally a nice one would she consider befriending your ddog a few hours a week?

Original poster
purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 14:56

@BiteyShark That camera sounds brilliant, you don't have a link do you? I would like to see what she actually does as at the moment all I have is what he says is happening... the dog doesn't bark when I leave and I stand at the gate before I go in to try and hear her and she isn't making any noise so it's difficult for me to know exactly how much she is barking. Really interesting about talk channels as well, I never would have thought that, I guess I'd assumed that talking would be more like having us home! I will try putting some music instead, maybe classical?! Really helpful advice, thank you. Yes, she has a walk before I leave her. I'm not working at the moment (off due to depression following recurrent miscarriages) so unfortunately can't afford to pay a dog walker and also I am available most of the time, I just have to pop out to run errands, grocery shop, etc.

Thanks @purits, I guess I hadn't fully considered how annoying dog barking could be to others. Do you have any advice?

OP posts:
Original poster
purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 15:00

@aprilmightmemynewname We get on OK with him but we don't really know him very well. I would never have considered your suggestion and it's actually making me think! It's hilarious but maybe I should suggest it to him...

OP posts:
Ilovecamping · 09/03/2018 15:04

We are the neighbours of barking dogs, it drives us mad we turn up the radio to try and drown out the noise. The barking is a high pitch and actually hurts my DP in his ears, we have spoken to neighbours (who we get on with really well). they have tried various solutions but nothing has worked.

BiteyShark · 09/03/2018 15:08

Search for ieGeek IP camera on Amazon.

Yes you would have thought a talk channel on the radio was ideal but I think my dog thought there were 'humans' about so barked to get their attention. I put smooth radio on for him and he seems to like that the best Grin

Tiddlywinks63 · 09/03/2018 15:11

I'm a dog lover/oenergy but my NDN's dog would bark nonstop everytime they left the house, so for 9 hours five days a week plus weekends if they went out.
It drove me mad and nothing they doing worked until the dog was rehomed (not because I complained but because they split up).

Kneedeepinunicorns · 09/03/2018 15:16

Would the dog tolerate a crate when you go out? My anxious dog would go spare roaming the house and get in a real state, but in a crate with top and all sides covered but the front section and positioned so she couldn't see a door or window, the tv on and something really good in her kong, would chew and then sleep.

heebiejeebie · 09/03/2018 15:26

We are the neighbours of a barking dog and it is not really the noise that is the problem. It's really stressful and depressing listening to the cries of a sad, anxious animal for hours on end. It's like torture.

Tiddlywinks63 · 09/03/2018 15:29

Oenergy?
Owner for goodness sake!

Original poster
purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 15:55

Oh dear @ilovecamping @Tiddlywinks63 @heebiejeebie Your stories haven't filled with me with hope! I really don't want to rehome her as she's a lovely sweet dog & has become a part of the family. Our older dog loves her too. The only reason for rehoming would be the neighbour.

Thanks @kneedeepinunicorns - we had her in a crate when we first got her as a small puppy and she hated it (we thought it would be fine as our older dog had one from day 1 and loved it) but alas it was a disaster, she howled & squeaked no matter how gently and positively we introduced it, got into a real state, pooing everywhere and chewing her bedding - nightmare!! We got rid of it and she's now in a bed under the kitchen worktop and is fine in there at night/when we're home, just seems to be when we're out that's the problem. There's no doors or windows she can see out of...

OP posts:
Original poster
purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 15:57

Thanks @BiteyShark, I will do that.

Ha that totally makes sense! Thanks for your help, I was hoping MN would come to my aid with practical advice!

OP posts:
mikesh909 · 09/03/2018 16:06

God, this is one of the most entitled things I've ever encountered here. How is it ok for your neighbour to be expected to put up with 3-4 hours of your barking dog at a time? As it clearly has not dawned on you yet, THIS IS NOT OK. There is no 'right' to have a pet. However, there is a legal right to peace and quiet in your own home, and your local council's environmental health team have a duty to enforce that.

It seems your neighbour has been extremely patient. I would seriously not bank on that patience continuing. I'm not sure you have any IDEA how very irritating it is listening to other people's animals 'separation anxiety'. The fact that you have justified this noise nuisance as such does not make it acceptable! Incredibly selfish and entitled behaviour on your part. What are you going to do about it?

mikesh909 · 09/03/2018 16:08

If you can't keep your dog in a situation where she is happy / not stressed and anxious then you should not have a dog.

and YY to this!

kinorsam · 09/03/2018 16:13

Agree with others. Living next door to annoying dogs, and having to endure hours of barking, howling and yapping is sheer purgatory.

Original poster
purpleflower23 · 09/03/2018 16:34

Thanks @mikesh909, you're right; I've been very selfish and entitled and I'm sorry. Thankyou for opening my eyes and helping me to see this issue from other people's perspective. I hadn't appreciated before how much of a problem this was for my neighbour. In terms of what I'm going to do about it, I came on Mumsnet for advice and some posters have made really helpful suggestions about cameras, leaving the radio on, training, behaviourists, dog sitters, etc, so there's lots for me try. I used to avoid going out in order to not have to leave her but that negatively affected my mental health so I do need to go out occasionally. If nothing works then I guess we will have to consider rehoming her Sad Are you a dog owner? Do you have any suggestions?

Thanks @kinorsam, I am beginning to realise that. Do you have any advice?

OP posts:
mikesh909 · 09/03/2018 22:46

I'm afraid I'm not a dog owner so I don't have any advice on that front. I am a neighbour though, and from that perspective I think it's great that you've acknowledged the problem rather than getting defensive. I think the camera idea is a good one. Then you can try a few other things, assess their success and hopefully reach a happy solution. Expecting your neighbours to tolerate 3-4 hour bouts of barking at any time of the day or night cannot be justified by your desire to keep your pet, so I really hope you manage to help your dog feel comfortable being home without you. Your being tied to the house 24/7 seems equally untenable! Good luck.

Earthmover · 09/03/2018 23:17

My neighbours dogs drove me absolutely demented with their barking during the day.
Even if it's not during 'unsociable hours' it can be like mental torture.
I'd come home from work and quite often be absolutely exhausted. Put my head on the cushion for a half hour catch up and the barking would start.
It was actually extremely intrusive.
People should not be expected to put up with their neighbours or their animals noise for extended periods on a regular basis.
I had a quiet word. Then a loud word. Then some serious get it sorted words.
I've no idea what is going on in peoples heads that they think it's acceptable and people just have to deal with it because it's during the day.
It's not. Most people want a quiet life. Minimal contact with their neighbours/not have to be reminded constantly via unwanted noise that they are still there.
Ps. I've always had a dog. I wouldn't dream of leaving it to create its own version of noise pollution

Earthmover · 09/03/2018 23:22

BTW just wanted to add...because you have control of your dog, you have the opportunity to do what's necessary to shut it up. That can make the barking seem tolerable.
When you are at the other side of the fence and you have no control over when the dog is barking and can't shut it up, it makes the problem soooo much more frustrating.

llangennith · 09/03/2018 23:26

All puppies chew, whine and are destructive. And they need lots of attention a guidance and routine.
Put pup in the crate and cover with a blanket. The whining will stop in a few minutes.

Kneedeepinunicorns · 09/03/2018 23:29

Is day care a possibility? It's not as expensive as you might think and it built the confidence of both my dogs a lot. Plus being run by very dog experienced people they're usually great with helping with behaviour issues. If you have a club locally that does dog training, the basic bronze/silver/gold, they're also usually great for helping with advice and behaviour, and many of the people who run them do 1:1 sessions looking at specific issues at home.