Dog seems to have seperation anxiety- help!

[JessMcL]

We have a 14 month old Labrador "puppy". We left him for the first time this weekend- theres always someone at home (me, DH, DS, our nanny with our youngest) apart from the odd 1/2 hour here and there. He sleeps upstairs with DS- we've told him time and time again it isn't a good idea and it will do him good sleeping downstairs but he won't do it.

Anyway- dog went to sitters this weekend, and he obviously slept downstairs crated. He hates his crate- well he doesn't hate it, but if you close him in he goes nutto (but will happily sleep in there on his own accord). The dog sitter didn't say it- but he obviously barked through the night. The dog is knackerd, think he's been given some sort of sedative to calm him down (he's just not himself- very dozy, not wanting to play) and the sitter looked knackard and said "we would have to have a serious discussion if you need him to stay again"- meaning in my eyes, he isn't welcome until he's sorted out.

What can we do?

I think unfortunately you have a big job on your hands. Puppies need to learn to be alone from the very early weeks - starring to teach this at 14 is a bit late :(

You need to crate train him properly by giving him his food in kongs while he's in the crate, and momentarily shutting the door over, building up to longer periods and eventually you leaving the room and then the house. You might want to use an Adaptil collar too.

*14 months

There is nothing wrong per second with your dog sleeping upstairs with the family. The problem is then expecting him to cope with the stress of not only you going away, but having to sleep away from the sitter in a crate. You need to decide whether you wish to put the work in to get him to a position where is he able to sleep downstairs and/or accept being shut in a crate, or whether it will be simpler to find a boarder that is happy for him to sleep in the bedroom. If you want to modify his behaviour it will take some time and effort and will not work unless DS is on board. Is he an adult? Otherwise I'm not sure why he is calling the shots on important decisions about your dog's boundaries.