I bet you will all be glued to it
"The mental hospitals of Britain have been combed to create this new and innovative TV show. The most tragic and vulnerable members of society can be seen playing LIVE tiddlywinks, 24/7 on UKTWAT RT+1 from tomorrow morning! You will have the opportunity to text in and suggest tortures for the contestants when they miss the pot with their tiddlywink. You might want to see their fingernails removed, a disembowelling or two or even some eyes being gouged out, the more gruesome the better! Make sure your children are watching, it will set them up for life being exposed to such hilarity!"