EASTENDERS - God im so SAD!

[JessicaandRebeccasmummy]

Just blubbed nearly the whole way through - someone tell me its still the hormones!!!

lol I have got such a headache from trying to stop myself crying the whole way through! Was too scared to start the thread for fear of being laughed at

hence me using the hormones as an excuse!!!

I blubbed too. Had Lottie asleep on my lap and I cried into her hair! I'm pregnant thought so I'm using the hormones as my excuse too.

(pg hormones here too of course ) dp still would have taken the p**s though so I had to hold it in! Went into the kitchen to get us a drink when they went to see the grave because I'd seen the preview and knew she was going to say 'See you soon' to william and that would have tipped me over the edge!!!

not pregnant and normally hard as nails, me but wept like a baby thru out even though I knew it was manipulative tosh... my 2 year old kept saying "its OK mummy" and wiping away my tears and kissing my face which set me off even more...

I am soo glad someone else started this thread! Whilst watching Eastenders - and crying like a baby, I might add - I was thinking shall I go on MN now and start a "who cried at Eastenders tonight" thread? Decided against it...

But I cried so much and I don't have the excuse of being PG, unfortunately.

I am not ashamed to say I cried at 'Enders tonight....well maybe a little bit

me too....also, - i would never have said this before he joined - because i'm really going to miss Shane aswell!

oh ....... me too

Sorry to interupt but havent seen it in a while, who died?

I sobbed my heart out, I had to go out of the room and watch it on my own upstairs. I have recently lost my grandad and 'Alfie' having difficulty 'watching his nan die slowly in front of him', reminded me of how I felt the last few months of grandad's life.

DSD (10) was sobbing her heart out, (she didn't realise I was) even dp was a bit teary (he will kill me for saying it). Maybe it was so emotional in our house because of recent events and they finally realised what I was going through watching my much loved grandad fade away.

I tended to 'shield' them from how much it was hurting me (much the same way as 'Alfie' is), I even took my step-kids to Thorpe Park the day he died as it had already beeen arranged and they were so excited about it, I didn't want to disapoint them.

Maybe they will apreciate me a bit more now, (well I can hope, but I think that I will always be seen as 'the wicked stepmother' somehow )