No matter what, she is rude and grumpy and I cannot bear it

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I just don't get it. DD is 13 and is rude and grumpy to me and younger brother EVERY day. DH is usually out of the picture as he works long hours. I adore her so much and it is causing me such heartache. I don't buy into the its a 'teenage thing'. We can all be hormonal, but every day?

In my experience (three teenage sons), the behavior is normal though infuriating. And the "Get Out of My Life" book is a big help to feeling less heartsick about it all.

Sympathy. It can ve very hard.

One bit of great advice that I was given after working with the little cherubs is

Ignore secondary behavior

So if you ask them to do X, and they do it , but huff and puff, ignore the huffing and puffing. It isn't worth the agro and it is their way of saving 'face'

But have set boundaries that you don't let them cross. You have a right to to be treated badly.

I would have believed you Riven. I am so sorry about your DD. We ended up sending one of ours to boarding school . . . .