Feel guilty for doing nothing with teens so far over summer

[AnimalFarm1983]

I suppose I need some reassurance. It's now week 3 of the summer holidays. The first 2 weeks I was working so couldn't do much with my boys 14 and 15. This week I'm on an annual leave and had planned to do things but I've had a stomach bug since last Wednesday and still not fully over it. Wed planned a trip to London, meeting up with grandparents, swimming etc and all I've done is lie on the sofa while they've mooched about the house gaming and eating. I feel particularly bad for my oldest who loves going out and doing things. They're not great at making their own plans which I have encouraged.
They're going on a church camp next week and we're going camping as a family the week after so they have got things coming up. I'm just feeling sorry for myself and guilty I suppose. Anyone else in the same boat? What are your teens doing to pass the time?

At that age I didn't arrange anything to do with with mine. They just did their own thing with friends. They could go swimming and visiting with out you.

Mine went out with friends at this age.

I do tell them to do this but for some reason they dont

at that age leave them to it. They can arrange to see friends if they want to. Wouldnt a 15 year old be working part time over the summer anyway?

Where??

What job can 15 year olds get nowadays? It’s not 1962 😂

They're teenage boys - this sounds perfect for them!

It’s hard enough for adults to get jobs these days. Summer jobs don’t really exist anymore and a lot of places won’t hire under 16 because of their insurance.

I wouldn't worry too much. Have DC 13 & 15 both dd's we have done a few (small) things but one of them has either sulked or looked like they have been forced out of the house the entire time.

Summer with teens is hard. I don't know what their friends do all summer but they're certainly not meeting up every day and hanging out.

Oh, bad luck, your bug sounds horrid.

Can they not take themselves off on the train to London / visit grandparents? If you arrange it for them - if they are hopeless at that bit?

Why do they need you in order to go swimming?

My teen isn’t interested in days out, he arranged stuff with friends. We have had a visit to Duxford and overnight stay.
DH and I took him to the cinema to see Spider-Man, a couple of mates are on holiday so they weren’t available this week.

I think Summer holidays can be tricky with teens. I was speaking with my Mum today and she asked what plans me and DD14 had as I have a couple of weeks off work. I said to my Mum at the moment she is in her bedroom scrolling and I am downstairs pottering and watching tv. I have got a few days out planned with her, we went into London yesterday but I said to my Mum, I can’t do something every day as (a) I need to have a rest too (b)if we did, we’d end up getting on each others nerves (we both like our space and (c) it is too pricey.

My Mum admitted to me that she did nothing with me and DB at that age and just left us to it! My DD seems to have a lovely couple of school friends but they have only met up once so far for a sleepover, one is now away on holiday and the other one (and my DD) don’t seem to initiate anything without the other one there!

I bet your DC are loving the downtime especially as they have got some events/holiday coming up.

I actually really find it painful the.summers with teens. I just can't bear seeing them do nothing ! Or endless scrolling

Could you kindly encourage some independence with them op? Set them the challenges of going out. Its nice your teena still want to do stuff like swimming with you but I think of that as an activity they could do with friends?

Don’t feel guilty! A few weeks to decompress and start feeling bored is probably perfect at this age. My dd15 has been content at home all holiday so far!

Can you go out in the evening when you’re better?
maybe a trip to the cinema or ten pin bowling?

I'm always amazed at the people who confidently insist that 'summer jobs don't exist anymore' as I live in a really touristy seaside area and there are shit loads of jobs for teens.

All the kids I know work from 14/15. Quite frankly, all the owners of ice cream shops, arcades, hot dog stands, cafes or standing on a car park taking cash would FAR rather employ a teenager on utterly low wages than have to pay an adult minimum wage. It's very easy round here for teens to work - not so much for their parents. I'm not convinced a lot of them have employee insurance.

Quite often the teen is the only one working in the household.

Done absolutely nothing with my almost 14 year old apart from school uniform shopping which was a complete moan fest from start to finish as they just wanted to be home. but it needed to be done. No plans for anything else even if i suggest anything it'll be met with a no.
I have an older teen who is working and no longer lives at home and does their own thing. I rarely see them.
I really miss when they were little. suppose its time for me to get my own life.