Teen boy with no friends

[Winetime00]

Hi, my 13yr old son has no real friends. It's heartbreaking, especially in the summer holidays. He's lonely. Won't join clubs and no interest in anything other than YouTube. He has ADHD and gets overexcited so when he does find someone to hang out with, he acts silly and wants to play. I think he has a reputation for being a bit embarrassing to be seen with. Really tough situation. Grateful for any advice.

That sounds hard OP. It does get harder sometimes for teens ND teens as the social gap widens between them and their peers.

I'd talk to him about clubs and put a bit more pressure on to try it/get him into a sport or hobby.

Does he have gaming friends? Lots of kids this age are just doing that!

I am so sorry OP, that sounds hard.

I can only share what I do, but situations are so different. Is he an only child? If so, I would try to
> make a few plans with him myself (cinema, cafe visit, or any other thing - those are two activities I can make my 15 year old do).

> make him start one sport (maybe martial arts, climbing or badminton - football may be tricky if he hasn’t played much as other boys may be very good)

> on the condition of him doing both of the above, buy him some gaming equipment where he could play with others.

hope you find something that works, you have got this!

Mine was the same
Also has adhd and had a bit of a reputation for being sslightly weird. His big interest at that age was airfix. We found him an airfix building club and his friends were retired men. But he was happy. He also volunteered in a charity shop which he stuck at for years. I was amazed because he usually takes a while to warm up and talk to people.
He went through spells of Pokemon cards obsessions and would go to events where you could swap cards. So not making deep friendships but at least out of his bedroom talking and interacting with people.
He's 17ynow and has a handful of good friends he's met through these interests. He doesn't have loads of friends, he doesn't ever join in big summertime hangouts at the park or anything. But he's happy.

It's tough. And sad to see them. Maybe I've given you some potential ideas?

This sounds so hard
.I have twins daughters and one of them is like this. Her sister tends to take her aside and tell her to tone it down. Do you think he may suit going to clubs with slightly younger children?

Iv one like thos but luckily his brothers are good to him.
Mine all do bmx racing at a local track which is helping. They have all made friends just one dc doesnt seem to make it extend beyond the hobby just yet.
Ita great sport for adhd kids as they re on their own bike, track gives them that dopamine rush amd they are around to her kids but not forced to interact if they dont want to

I have come on here to pretty much write the same post. My DS is 14 and so far this summer holidays he's lay in bed most of the time, watched TV or played on the computer a little (unless I've dragged him out with me!) it makes me so sad.
I don't have any advice OP but your not alone.

My 15 year old (also adhd) had a lonely Year 7-9, but coming on to say that things have much improved in Year 10. Didn't move schools or anything drastic, things just seemed to click. I think he matured slightly and fell in with a small group with a common interest. He'd always known these boys but suddenly just seems to have been accepted as part of their group. It's so painful for parents to see our kids being lonely and hearing about everyone else meeting up and having fun. I just tried my best to keep him busy during the holidays (days trips or small trips out of the house with the promise of food etc) and encouraged any interaction I got the slightest whiff off e.g. drop everything to become a taxi service, encourage gentle messaging to suggest a trip to the cinema with someone he games with etc. Hopefully things will improve for your son too. My husband said it's all about finding the right tribe and sometimes that doesn't happen until later.