To get between them or leave them to it

[2strappinglads]

For context, 2 DS.

DS1 16.. 5ft 10 and built like a rugby player also very probably high functioning ND , cannot control emotions well
DS2 15.. 6ft, lean and gym fit, no ND, bit of a clown (likes making everyone laugh), so laid back it ridiculous

We've been out this afternoon and DS2 has just been annoying, despite being told to stop by me and DS1

Get home and before I can get in the door they are in the kitchen, 1 screaming at 2, pushed him, 2 pushed back, so 1 punches 2 and before I know it both me and DH are pulling them apart

This is the 1st time it's happened, if it happened when DH wasn't here I would never have been able to get in the middle of it.

DS1 is now upset as he doesn't know why he started it, DS is just nonplussed.

I don't know wether we did the right thing by getting them apart, or if we should have just let them deal with it.

I’m a mum of 3 big teen boys. We generally leave them to it whilst they’re verbally arguing (although get them to talk it through once they’ve calmed down) but have a hard red line with physical violence.
Why should you put up with this behaviour in your home, when it’s the sort of thing that would get the police called out in the street?

They have talked it through now they are calm

I think the main issue is that DS2 can't keep still/quiet, which provokes DS1