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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Does" safe word" get used in circles other than bdsm?

14 replies

Idontmeanto · 21/10/2016 17:59

Because my younger teen just insisted on having one to allow me to remove a splinter and I'm a bit freaked out!

OP posts:
audreyharley · 21/10/2016 18:24

I don't think I've ever heard it in a non BDSM context. Maybe she's heard it somewhere and didn't understand what she was saying, it's up to you if you want to explain or not.

TrinityForce · 21/10/2016 18:26

american tickling...? they shout "uncle" or something when they've had enough.

fatsowhale · 21/10/2016 18:30

At my junior school we used to shout PAX! in the playground when we'd had enough of being pummelled. It was a ridiculous place. Everyone respected the safe word, but it wasn't called 'safe word'. It was just what we all said.

MakeItStopNeville · 21/10/2016 18:30

My teens and I have a safe word. If they're ever in a situation they feel uncomfortable with, they can call or text and I'll go get them, no questions asked. At least, in theory. We've never needed to use it so I'm not sure if I would resist asking questions! Grin

Idontmeanto · 21/10/2016 18:45

I just said ow owww owww was too ambiguous and she'd better use fish fingers or something.
I should have questioned it I think!

OP posts:
VagueButExcitlng · 21/10/2016 20:42

Yes we have a safe word like Neville. Also used at large family gatherings when overbearing cousins are getting a bit much.

She chose banana because that's Dan and Phil's safe word!

Idontmeanto · 21/10/2016 20:54

Dan and Phil have a safe word?! That explains where it came from then! I'd been fretting about what she'd found online!

OP posts:
eurochick · 21/10/2016 20:55

I've heard it in a few tv shows so I think it's common parlance.

BlueberryBakewell · 22/10/2016 17:47

My kids used one when swimming. So I knew if they were playing around or actually in trouble. If they shouted Cat I would know they needed help.

chocdonutyy · 22/10/2016 17:58

Weirdly we have a safe emoji. It was used when dd wanted to come in and wanted me to text/call her in rather than admit she was bored/cold/tired! Though why she just couldn't lie that I had had said that I don't know!

MakeItStopNeville · 23/10/2016 04:40

Ours is banana too! Bloody Dan and Phil!!

MakeItStopNeville · 23/10/2016 04:42

Op, it's been an "American thing" for the last 10ish years. She used properly, I think it's s really good thing.

MakeItStopNeville · 23/10/2016 04:44

*If used properly, it's a really good thing!

KP86 · 23/10/2016 06:23

I've known about safe words for years, and definitely not just in a sex-based context.

Mind you, even shows like CSI included it in context with Lady Heather so perhaps I did learn it there?

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