On the verge of kicking her out eldest DD16

[Pisssssedofff]

She hits her siblings and really hurts them aged 12 and 6. My son when he was interviewed by the court over custody thing drew my eldest dd in the sad house.

I kind of feel these incidents are happening more frequently with exam pressure. I'm on my own with 4 of them. In a three Bed house. It's pretty much like living in a pressure cooker

That can happen on any thread handsoff. Basically there are people who always think they know best, that their opinion is the only right way and if you don't follow it you are wrong

Oh and pisssssed off you both need counselling.

I am in the UK and my daughter was at school today so not all schools are off today though I wish ours had been.

NeedACleverNN
Well maybe those people actually have better lives,have no drama,dont hate their kids and their kids are not violent...Maybe those people really KNOW BEST.

Handsoffmysweets the OP is somebody refusing RL help and hiding the domestic violence her kids endure. It is good that people still wish to argue with her. Nobody else appears to speak for her kids, not OP, not the kids' fathers, nobody. And SS who could be their voice are shut out by the OP lest they say something unkind about the sofa.

Unless you are the OP herself and have been in her exact same position know one knows better because know one knows exactly what to do here.

"The very least I'd be doing is having you in to discuss what your plan is and referring you to the "Troubled Families" programme if you didn't have a plan of your own."

It's exactly comments like that and the raised eyebrow emoji that puts people off asking for help.
The OP has a plan.

What needs done is actually blatantly obvious NeedA

The OP needs serious help, she's refusing to get any help whatsoever, she has said so herself many times. In a lot of people's eyes that's near enough to abuse and neglect. At the very least she's completely failing all children involved.

It's clear she needs to ring SS herself. That much is clear. For what ever reason she is refusing. But that does not give anyone to start to verbally abuse her

NeedACleverNN
With this mindset we don't need SS then,courts and police because everyone is trusted to know whats best for them and the welfare of their children

Have you thread the whole thread, newbrummie?

The OP has been given shedloads of advice but has found an excuse for every suggestion. She says a SW criticised her sofa so she would never ask them for support, for example. The only agency she contacted was school, where the DD is a model student and a pleasure to teach.

My job is to signpost families to appropriate services. My cynicism is reserved strictly for those who refuse to even entertain the idea of asking for support from the agencies who are best placed to provide it, preferring to insist, as the OP has on this thread, that no-one will help them.

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With this mindset we don't need SS then,courts and police because everyone is trusted to know whats best for them and the welfare of their children

But they are people who have been trained to work with difficult families and in difficult situations.

I don't know about you but my experience in child care is about 3 years as that is the age of my oldest child. She shows no behaviour like the daughter described above.

Apart from advising the OP to call social services or the police there is nothing else we can do. All the abuse is doing is agitating the OP even more and could actually be making the situation worse

This really is my final word on the matter and then I'm asking for this to be deleted.
I've thanked those who've offered support and suggestions. I've seen within the family - not immediate - and friends just how ineffective and frankly infantile some of these out side support services can be. Now if you work for them I don't suppose for s moment you'd agree with me, if you're living the dream you won't either and I'm 100% sure 17 years ago I'd have said exactly the same.
Yesterday I was fuming, beyond angry. Today it's ok again. This will not continue for 3 years, 5 or 10. A plan is in place that does the right thing by everyone and me rushing off to SS or booting her out the door would ruin everyone's long term future. So I'm on it, huge wake up call for me but this can be prevented from happening again and will, I don't need to share the how with you. So again. Thank you

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2446696-To-not-allow-my-kids-to-spend-Christmas-in-an-old-peoples-home

NewBrummie are you in fact Pisssssedofff ? Only your circumstances couldn't be more similar... Ex in Australia, come back to the uk, seeing kids in hotels etc etc etc

The OP has dished out her fair share of abuse herself on this thread, tbf.

Her posting style is very aggressive.

Very understandable yesterday

Her 12 year old had been attacked and she was furious. Then everyone started jumping on her and she obviously lashed out back.

Like she said before if a complete stranger had been the one to hit her 12 year old, people would have been more understanding of her anger. But because it was her own daughter it wasn't accepted

Did you report the suspected sock, Letmehaveausername? I have.

Would you just listen to yourselves ? You're grown women

Thanks Need but honestly don't worry, it's fine

NeedA She wasn't jumped on for being angry with her daughter, people were and still are disgusted at the contempt and vileness she spewed about her daughter, saying she didn't love her or want her or give a fuck about her. She repeatedly refused all advice (and some people have given fantastic advice here) and her erratic behaviour and sudden jumps in her story.

A lot of people would find it hard to read a post that so clearly is crying out for help without reading the hate she spoke about her child on top of that. And it's not just this post she has been agressive on either. Aggression seems to be the default nature here.

Like I said, it made a very difficult read..

Not yet pax because I honestly can't figure out if the op is genuine or not. There's a lot of inconsistencies looking at the posting history for both names however, so either a very badly thought out story or the op is having difficulties with memory

HQ are quick to answer the sock question though, it will be blatantly obvious to them.

It's blindingly obvious that the OP is in fact NewBrummie and a whole host of other user names. posting about the dramas in her life....though you're right, huge inconsistencies. Make up your mind OP.