Niece has done well in GCSEs but doesn't know what to do next

[paulkal]

One of my nieces has done well in her GCSEs and doesn't know what to do next. Both I and her mother have discussed with her what she could do next but she doesn't seem to know what she wants to do. She excels in sciences but has not developed any ambition to use these subjects. It is my view that she needs to develop her social skills and become more confident around being with people she's not used to. I've suggested getting a holiday job or even voluntary work but that seems to fall on deaf ears. Has anyone had a similar experience with their children and if so, what did you do?

Take her to round the local colleges.

Ours have continuous Advice and Guidance sessions now where she can wander round, speak to staff from different courses and see if she fancies anything

Go with her (or see if someone can) but let her speak to the staff. My bugbear when doing Advice and Guidance is when parents speak for the potential students.

Does she have a place at school/college for September?

What sort of grades has she got?

If she has B grades and above, I would suggest A-levels, in subjects that she enjoys.

Thanks for your reply. Sorry for the delay in replying as I've just returned from holiday. I like the idea of taking her to a college and getting some Advice and Guidance sessions. I will pass this on to my sister.

She needs to continue some form of study/apprenticeship . Colleges may still be running open days and take enrolments. Taking science at A level or similar doesn't commit her to a career path.

Thanks for your reply. Just returned from holiday. She hasn't got a place at college due to her indecision and my sister intends to persuade her to start checking out some this week.

She does know she doesn't actually have a choice but to continue presumably ? Did her school have a 6th form ?

She got an A and two Bs. My sister will probably suggest that she visits some colleges to see what kind of course she would like to do and then encourage her to enroll.

That doesn't sound quite right OP. Pupils usually sit at least 9 GCSEs. Did she fail the others? Or has she actually done AS or A levels (where three is more usual)?

Sorry I didn't explain, she got the grades I mentioned in Maths Physics and Chemistry which are the subjects she was most concerned about. She got mostly Cs and Bs for the other subjects.

She is legally required to continue her education and will need to be quick to get a college place sorted out - most of them start this week! How come they have only just thought about this?

Hi, titchy. Thanks for your reply. Yes you're right she is legally required to continue her education which her mother has been trying to get through to my niece. The difficulty has been trying to help her make a decision without making her feel pressurized because when she has felt pressurized in the past, she has usually become very sulky and uncommunicative and unwilling to make any decision at all. You are right in saying that she needs to get a move on but her emotions are taking a long time to kick in.

She's probably thinking that having left it so late she'll end up doing something she doesn't want to do, she'll need a bit of reassurance that she still has options but it does need to be done with a firm hand too so she knows this is required, it's not something she gets to be sulky about or she really will lose out. If she got okay GCSE grades she can handle a little pressure.

HI LIZS thanks for your reply. Yes, she does know that she hasn't got a choice but to continue but it has been difficult so far to encourage her to act upon this. Much as my sister hates having to spell things out to her in terms of having to do something out of obligation, I think that she will have to be firm and maybe explain to her that it doesn't commit her to what she will do for the rest of her life, just that it will be the next stage in her education.

Thanks for your reply. I will certainly pass on your comments, as my sister has perhaps become a little to defensive over the past few months. Perhaps my niece is more capable of handing pressure than she is aware of and I'm sure that my sister will want to reassure her that she can.

Check the local colleges anyway even if she hasn't got a space - there's lots of changing around in the weeks after results come in and even in the first couple of weeks after term starts. DD was told her local college was full so enrolled at another further away, but within a fortnight of term starting was able to switch to the local college doing exactly the subjects she wanted.

I'm going to look like I'm on some kind of mission because I was talking glowingly about my ds's private careers advice yesterday but it really has helped with him to visit an independent adviser to get information and guidance.

He did the Morrisby Psychometric Assessment then had a session with qualified and experienced adviser but your niece may not have time for the assessment first so just meeting the advisor may help.

This is where we went

OK, I'll bear that in mind. Her mother was thinking of contacting an independent advisor and this may be the best course of action at this stage.

Great. Thanks for that. very encouraging.