One of two things is about to happen

[LemonDough]

Either dd(17, diagnosed with emerging personality disorder) is going to arrive home & cause violent mayhem or dh will be out for another hour & she'll go no contact for another week.

I haven't seen her for a week & home life has been so lovely & calm/normal. That's not to say that she hasn't caused chaos from afar, because she has. She is using drugs of all kinds.

I've had enough. If she doesn't move on quickly tonight I suspect there will be proper fireworks. I have done some meditation in prep.

Wish me luck please!

Is she getting help for her drug problems? Her personality disorder?

She's had oodles of help with the personality stuff from CAMHS but little to none about the drugs.

We're working on it but me & dh are at tether's end.

She's been at home for 30mins. Dh is fraught, I've been accused of drinking (I'm a sober alcoholic) and dd2 has had to lie about having no money & has hidden her cash out of harms way.

She's going out again now thank goodness.

Has she always behaved like this op?

Will she be out for the night now or will she return? Is she safe?

She came out of the womb screaming and she hasn't stopped since. No-one takes me seriously when I talk about it because I cope by joking :S

Is she safe? Yes, I think so. There's only so far I can say, she isn't here, she hasn't let us keep her safe in over 3 years. My motto is that bad news travels fast so no news is good news.

Boundaries don't work, the consequences mean nothing to her. If she loses things (phones, computers,lifts) she steals things and vanishes until she thinks we will have calmed down.

I'm done with calming down. Trouble is I don't think her dad is done yet.

Before she came home tonight briefly I hid all my jewellery, I will get a lock for the bedroom door tomorrow.

I bought some tobacco today (I know, bad mother). I put a small wedge in the empty pack and left it on the kitchen table. Guess what, she stole the lot.

Nothing new. But GGGGRRRRRAAAARRRGGGHHHH.

I expected it, it doesn't make it easier.