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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Festival season approaching.....what to do

17 replies

skyblue11 · 08/02/2013 16:04

My DD is 17 and wants to go to a festival about 80 miles away, I asked her how she'd get home and she said we'd stay in a tent, that is her and 2 GF's. Now I know she'd be drinking and she has little common sense so I worry about her safety, she said don't worry I won't be losing my virginity and having sex with 3 different boys like did last year. I despair, in less than a year she'll be 18 anyway and do her own thing. I just want her to be safe, I suggested a compromise and to go for the day, anyone else any ideas on what I should do?

OP posts:

MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay · 08/02/2013 16:44

I think you should let her go..she's 17 not 12!
Honestly festivals are pretty much a rite of passage now and they aren't dreadful things at all..they are amazing!
My teens started going at 16, and I worried but was brave ..and they were absolutely fine (Ok DD1 got swine flu the first time and came home with a temp of 104!) Next year her brother went..then her sister and now they are Reading veterans.. the girls (now 18 and 21) have just bought tickets for this year's Reading festival. They are neither especially sensible, nor stupid girls, they went in a group of friends.
We buy a cheap but decent sized tent each year, send a mega cheap mobile phone with them and they return filthy, exhausted , usually minus the tent, and in need of a poo !
I think you need to relax a bit to be honest.. 17 is plenty old enough to go:)

PhyllisDoris · 08/02/2013 16:48

My DD (17) is going for the first time this year. I'm. But nervous, but know they'll be fine.

IDontKnowWhereMyMedalsAre · 09/02/2013 10:58

Ds 17 going this year for the first time. And yes I'm a bit worried as I will be in a different country!

constantnamechanger · 09/02/2013 11:01

I made DH go last year with ds and mates but this year he is going alone

as you said she is 18 soon - if she can pay for it let her go

ubik · 09/02/2013 11:04

Just let her go. memories are made of this stuff. soon enough she'll have responsibilities. let her make mistakes, she'll learn from them

(I worked in loads of music festivals from age 16 and have lots of good memories and some bad ones)

Numberlock · 09/02/2013 11:04

Let her go - she's been open and honest. It would be an embarrassment not to mention total waste of money to just to stay for one day!

ubik · 09/02/2013 11:13

It's sad to see the rubbish folk leave behind these days though. Whole tents just left because people cannot be bothered to take them down

Sugarice · 09/02/2013 11:25

Depends which festival she's going to.

DS1-17 went to Wakestock last year and there were signs warning that any alcohol found on underage kids would be confiscated and risk being chucked out of the site. There were police with sniffer dogs too, scared the bejeezus out of ds and his mates. Stone cols sober all weekend!

I was pleased with how smoothly it all went.

Selks · 09/02/2013 11:36

She's nearly an adult. Just let her go. If she's going with a group of friends maybe have a chat about them sticking together and taking care of each other if drunk.
My DD started going to festivals with her friends aged 16.

DeepRedBetty · 09/02/2013 12:15

yy to it been an utter embarrassment if one's mother makes you only go for the day! Three quarters of the point is the staying in a muddy field bit.

I do get cross with the abandoned tents. I can see the argument from the practical point of view, taking down a wet muddy tent and carting it across the site with a hangover is never fun, and you can get six man tents from places like Lidl for fifty quid, which are such poor quality that very likely they'll rip after only a couple of uses. It does seem wasteful to my thrifty soul though.

someoftheabove · 09/02/2013 19:51

I agree with all those who say let her go. My DD went to Reading for the whole weekend for the first time last year aged 16 - she loved it and came home in one piece, and resolved to take her own food this year, as the veggie stuff was gross, apparently!

VivaLeBeaver · 09/02/2013 19:55

I've been to festivals before. I'd say they're really quite safe, lots of stewards.

A lot of the smaller festivals seem to be full of 16/17/18 yo public school types in Jack Wills t shirts.

PrincessOfChina · 09/02/2013 19:58

I'd let her go. I went to my first at 17 (16 years ago!) and it was fine.

We drank a bit, but didn't get ridiculously drunk. We mainly revelled in what is essentially the safest type of freedom you can get. How many other teen holidays are policed by approximately 1 zillion jobs worth security guards?

Original poster

skyblue11 · 10/02/2013 09:54

Thank you for your postings good to get views on this...

OP posts:

specialsubject · 10/02/2013 14:26

just buy her a big pack of condoms and remind her to watch her drink.

leaving tents around is littering.

ubik · 10/02/2013 15:34

Yup, nothing like your mum giving you a big box of conforms to put you off sex

OhMerGerd · 11/02/2013 23:33

Ok this is where I turn from the overbearing witch who checks the Facebook and texts of my 16yo DD sporadically for unbecoming behaviour, to the irresponsible slattern who lets her DD run feral.
We live in a festival's locals's concessions zone. Aged 13 she went with a friend who had parents attending, but they didn't go round with the parents just met for lunch and pick up before camping in friends garden and returning next day. Aged 14 DD and two friends camped in tent next to DD1 aged 20 who was with a larger mixed group, they didn't hang out with them but sort of bumped into them occasionally in the serendipitous way young people do. Last year we were away. This year there is some talk of an end of GCSE mixed group camping but as the DDs 16 all now have boyfriends (end of A level for them) we've gone a bit squeamish( other DM's and I ) and may be suggesting the camp in the garden scenario. Lol ... It's not the drugs and rock and roll that turns us into over anxious mamas but the sex!
We paid last time. DD would have to find funds if it goes ahead. Damned if we're paying for her to cough cough ahem.... So probably it won't be happening.... Oh dear!
I'd say let them go and have a good time. Gulp... Now can I muster up the good grace to do the same....?

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