Pocket money - 13yo DD and 11yo DS

[daisie4]

Just like some advice on what is the typical amount of pocket money for my DCs, I think we're below average - both get £2 per week.

I tried to increase DD to £5, but attached a few chores to the increase, unfortunately she didn't bother doing them and it became a source of conflict as some needed to be done so I either kept reminding or did them myself and docked pocket money. In the end I couldn't be bothered with the hassle so it went back down to £2. She bought in to the whole list but just never got around to them. The chores were to make her bed everyday (which she now does), iron her clothes (just left in the utlity room for weeks), sort out the washing into piles of who it belongs to (Idid this in the end), cook one evening meal a week - just something like baked potatoes and tuna - I had to remind, although she did do this.

I'm finding that my DD doesn't have enough money for her wants, although I do buy her lots of clothes and I think she has enough - this is what she mainly turns cash into. My son has plenty.

What is the going rate in your house? And do you attache chores, if so what? And are these chores done willingly or do you just turn into a nag? Thanks

Heaven knows what's typical; I have friends who give their DC more than us, but they rarely allow their DC to actually spend it on anything. Meanwhile DC swear they have friends who get £5-£10 cash/week with no strings attached or need to chores to earn it.

Mine get their age each month, which is above your rates, I reckon. It's not tied to anything although I sometimes dock it for terrible behaviour (13yo is having his next 2 months docked).

Mine can earn extra by doing chores (they choose not to, 13yo likes to flog his old toys instead ).

I only buy them essentials and birthday/Xmas gifts out of my budget, and a bare minimum of clothes, luckily they don't ask often for clothes. I'm buying 13yo an outfit over the Xmas break, though, he needs it.

Hi lljkk, thanks for your reply, parenting would be much easier with a manual! It is useful to know what others do, at 13 I don't really know friends parents from secondary school, in primary you just used to chat at pick up.

Ooh, I just found your other thread . Nice to be shredded...not .

Maybe I should add that out of my pocket I pay for transport, phone, some trip out expenses (some haggling, but I might spring for a cinema ticket just not the popcorn). If I didn't pay for phone credit the phones would never have any!

As for your list of chores being harsh... I know a family that expects a lot more and the kids don't even get pocket money. It's just expected.

Good luck finding right way forward for you.

Oh lljkk, so sorry if I offended you I thought I'd get more replies in chat as its a bit busier - please forgive me x

You didn't offend me!? I thought people were a bit harsh to you on the other thread, that's what I meant by shredded (you were shredded).

What do you think you'll do in future wrt pocket money?

My dc of those ages get £5 a week but it's strictly chore-dependent. For that they have to tidy their room/clear up their clothes once a week, and do a daily chore (vacuuming, emptying dishwasher, putting out bins, hanging up washing). No chores = no money (dd1 doesn't really care about money so sometimes loses her pocket money, dd2 would never slack off if money's involved).

They get money for birthdays and Christmas too and don't spend it all but if they wanted more I'd attach more chore options.

I do have to nag about chores (well, really I rant and scream and shout, but nag sounds less demented). It's very tedious.

Hi lljkk, I thought you meant shredded as in through the shredder destroyed! The other thread did make feel like an ultra strict mean draconian parent! I'm going to set up a bank account and put a sum in per month, I've had a chat with dd to see what she thinks is a reasonable amount that will meet her needs, in my mind thats probably £25 to £30, and that'll cover cinema/coffee trips nice to have clothes and other bits and bobs, but I'll still buy birthday party presents, essentail clothes and skincare products etc. I don't think she'll end up with any more than shes getting now but it'll be her responsibility to budget properly. Thank you for your comments - they were really useful.

Hiya Daisie4 I have dcs, 16, 14, and 11 (still in Yr6)
At Primary school my dcs get/got 10p per week, per yr of age - so my 11 yr old gets £1.10 per week.
At secondary school, they get £1 per month per year of age, so dd1 now gets £14 per month and ds gets £16 per month.
We pay all their subs / membership for things they go to. They are expected to do similar jobs to what you suggest, but that is not directly linked to pocket money - everyone who lives here has to contribute, and always have.
Older 2 have gone out and got themselves a weekly paper round each to increase their income. ds manages to spend everything, dd manages to save most of hers, so 'is it enough?' depends on the child.

this question gets asked on here a lot, and you will find the amounts vary HUGELY. You just have to do what's right for you.