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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Teenagers and their squalour <sigh>

21 replies

MarionCole · 24/06/2011 13:59

DSD has put the following in the wash over the course of the last two weeks:

2 pairs of knickers
1 bra
1 t-shirt
2 school shirts.

I don't know which is worse - the thought that she is wearing the same knickers/tights/socks every day or that all her dirty clothes are all hiding in her shit-tip of a room.

OP posts:

IloveJudgeJudy · 24/06/2011 16:13

I feel your pain. You could be talking about my lying, stealing 14 yo DD. I took all her clothes that she absolutely did not need out of her room as a punishment so she has now taken lots of mine, including mine and DH's socks that she has not put in the wash. Where are they? Somewhere in the shit-tip of her room.

Original poster

MarionCole · 24/06/2011 21:48

I reckon everyone should be made to live with a teenager for a month before they have a baby.

OP posts:

whenigrowup · 25/06/2011 09:24

I'm relieved I'm not the only one going through this! My youngest son will wash his hair dilligently every morning but there's an unpleasant odour coming from somewhere in his room. I too have the same small handful of washing coming down to the washing machine from both son and older daughter and like-wise her room is an appalling mixed up tip of clothes, towels, make-up and rubbish.

noddyholder · 25/06/2011 09:26

I agree Marion I would never have had children if I had had even a week with a teenager.

Wilts · 25/06/2011 09:31

Ds1 also has the manky odour about his room. There are piles of clothes everywhere and his latest disgusting habit is to wear the same pjs for days. Now that on its own is bad enough, but he suffers with lots of nose bleeds and yes he does wear the grim blood stained items over and over

Quattrocento · 25/06/2011 09:34

Why do they want to be dirty though? This is the mystery.

I tidy their rooms. It is truly the only way. Occasionally I make them tidy their own rooms but the effort of bullying persuading them to do it is usually just too much.

Occasionally this tidying up thing makes me flinch with horror. This morning I found an old notebook of DD's with some choice graffiti from her friend, featuring some surprisingly anatomically correct drawings of penises, a reprimand for failing to hand in some homework and a note that I can only describe as despairing from her piano teacher.

They rebel about washing - when they were children they accepted having a bath or shower every day. Now it's slipped to one every two days.

Their rooms smell musty despite being tidied and cleaned every day, no dirty clothes anywhere and beds changed weekly. I think it's the smell of teenage hormones.

Boarding school should be compulsory for 13-18 year olds - they are quite revolting.

mumblechum1 · 25/06/2011 15:27

I just plucked up courage to hoover in ds's room. The sound of clinking beer bottles gave away that he has at least a bin bag's worth of biscuit packets, crisp packets, several beer bottles and God knows what else under there.

Next time he's out I'm going in there with full biohazard gear.

I may be some time.

BuggerAllTheBestNamesAreTaken · 25/06/2011 15:35

I tidy their rooms every morning, if they complain about lack of privacy they get told unless they keep their rooms to the standard that I do then they have to put up with me coming in and going through their stuff, yes my DS's room does have a strange odour despite the window being open most of the time! What really annoys me is the sweaty socks left on the sofa downstairs!!

Original poster

MarionCole · 25/06/2011 16:29

Perhaps I should do that - tidy it or I will when you are at school.

OP posts:

MynamesMikeIswimlikeafish · 25/06/2011 16:38

Oh I don't bother. They can live in squalor as long as it's confined to their rooms. As long as they don't hoard the towels and the dishes, what doesn't make it to the laundry basket doesn't get done.

onadifferentplanettoday · 25/06/2011 16:39

My Ds' room is neat and tidy they change their clothes daily and hang up and put away the clean stuff. They also strip and change their beds reguarly but there is still that very strange odour every morning, though it does disappear quickly once the windows are open.

mumblechum1 · 25/06/2011 17:08

I'm of the "it's their space, they can do what they like with it" school of thought.

BCBG · 25/06/2011 17:16

Quattrocento you speak the truth . my older three dcs board/boarded from 13-18, and they are very appreciative of their rooms when they are at home! They are used to sorting laundry, making beds, being tidy (after a fashion) and they love having their own space when they are at home.

magnolia74 · 25/06/2011 17:22

Well I'm a mean mummy who makes them tidy every single day except sunday
They are twins (age almost 12) so take it in turns and that includes bringing all plates etc down, washing down, bin emptied and floor hoovered twice a week.

Dd1 is almost 16 and she also has a pretty tidy room but she does sleep in her clothes from that day and then wash and change in the morning

Original poster

MarionCole · 25/06/2011 17:30

In truth I have given up, I will fumigate it when University comes.

OP posts:

ivykaty44 · 25/06/2011 17:33

my dd1's room was miserable, utterly depressed - she moved out and now it is a happy room its what teens do they are for soem unknown reason dirty little herberts and yet they look so sophisticated when they go out...

mich54321 · 25/06/2011 17:38

I have the opposite problem - wear something for 10 minutes then its put in the wash. Can wear 3 or 4 outfits a day - it must be nice to have so little washing and ironing per week ! Room stinks of cheap spray - think someone is trying to impress

rainbowinthesky · 25/06/2011 17:53

Warning, smug post to follow.

WHen ds started puberty he wasnt great at washing for a few weeks but then since that time (just over 2 years ago) he has showered every day without fail (more than once if he is exercising) and keeps him room spotless and vacuumed.

Schtum · 25/06/2011 20:24

My daughter wore the same bra all week last week - a very eye catching bright floral number - under her thin white (ie pretty transparent) school blouse. I bit my lip (she's 17) until, finally, I could stand it no more and had a go at her about how awful and skanky it must look to everyone - teachers, other kids - that she hasn't changed her bra all week.

This stuff is completely alien to me. I really don't remember ever being like this when I was young.

mumeeee · 26/06/2011 14:50

It's normal for a teenager to have an untidy room. DD3 I'd 19 and her room's a tip. She has Dyspraxia which adds to the problem as she has organisational problems. I remind her to tidy every so often and occasionally help her. But other than that I leave it to her. I would never tidy a teenagers room or even enter their room without asking them. they do grow out of it eventually DD1 was just as bad. She is now 24 and married and is always cleaning her flat.

BusyBodd · 26/06/2011 15:13

Please can I has a little smug...my son's room is always immaculate and has been since he was 12...but that's 'cos he has Aspergers!!! He once punched a friend becasue they moved a pencil on his desk. It has to be one of the few advantages!!!

DD is also pretty neat but incredible cluttered, and a bit of a nightmare on laundry.And I'm sure we have our own ozone hole above the hosue from all her body spray.

I'm of the school of "It's their space, and they won't learn how to manage their stuff if I keep doing it for them".

The smell is a puberty/adult thing and not always linked to cleanliness. My DH can wear a t-shirt for days and it doesn't smell, and he doesn't use deoderant because he doesn't need to. He showers everyday and is always neat and clean. I also shower and change my clothes but can have unpleasant under-arms after half an hour unless I use very strong anti-perspirant straight away.

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