Is there anything I can do to make my arse smaller before Tuesday? Any ideas that don't involve cutting it off are welcome

[pagwatch]

Really. The bikini looks fine from the front but my bum is doing an convincing impersonation of a tired hippo.

Anything ?

[sigh]

almost constant lounging by the pool with plenty of cocktails - sarong for all other times ... or just more cocktails so that everything becomes a wonderful haze of loveliness

Walk with your hips slighty more forward and shoulders further back?
Sometimes works for me when I realise im not standing straight the result is I look thinner!

(sorry I havent got any witty ideas!)

just lay down a lot?

We have waiter service
I guess that helps.

It is the walking down the beach with DD type thing. I can never just casually tie on a sarong. I always look like I am covering my arse.

I like the cocktail notion though. Although that is ironic as it is at least partly the source of the arseage in the first place

[sigh again]

I am sure good posture would help. I do kind of shrink down trying to be un noticed . That probably makes it worse.

Thanks

erm, heeled flip-flops? [smirk]

I was going to suggest magic underwear. Thankfully I read the OP .

Oooh High heeled flip flops...

I could look like one of those women in 1970s action films. I could get a big hat too!

at magic underwear under bikini.

I could lie by the pool pretending I am about to scuba dive

big hat could balance out arse ...

would this do?

perfect

you must stretch up your arms to adjust your hair when standing up. Apparently it elongates the body. Although not sure you want to elongate arse really.

Do some pilates

and shove stuff into your bra to make your boobs look bigger

flirt a little with the waiter

job done

enjoy holiday

pag no one will care about your arse. They will be too busy obsessing about their own

But for future reference, stop eating bread

stretching, flirting, padding bra - excellent

I know you are right Cyb. Everyone will be worrying abouttheir own big boobs or wedgie or thread veins or wobbly bits. But I wish I was in proportion.

Haven't eaten bread for years, doing low carb, at gym now 3 times a week . Just arse has grit and determination...

Thanks though

Fake tan and get some of the new ambre solaire factor 30 oil - shiny and brown and your arse will look fine

How are you getting on pag? 3 days to go...need anymore tips?!!

Mudwrap, those inch loss ones where they cover you in mud soaked bandages. Had it 2 days before my wedding and would recommend it to anyone looking for a quick non-invasive fix. Doesn't last more than a week or so (water doesn't put it back on - it's alcohol), perfect for holidays.

Universal contour wrap

Sarong

fake tan

go topless-they'll all be too busy looking at your tits to notice your arse

I am sadly titless... [shame]

I will look at contour wrap and mudwrap. But intend to drink. Quite a lot.

Perhaps if I drink enough I will get beer goggles

Bobbaline - I have been to the gym again and bought new bikini. Dh assures me that he thinks I look fine. I think i just need to lie down a lot. And remember what cyb said. No one else carea. And I should concentrate on having a good time.

You can try and accept it as it is, then it won't matter to you. Seriously.

lol @ snice

My final tip, carry on looking at yourself in the mirror from the front and STOP LOOKING AT YOUR REAR VIEW!!!!

You should preen that you look good from the front in a bikini which is more than can be said for a lot of us!!!