I need help

[LottieDugalo]

I've been reading this section all day, and I've seen some fab advice (although I'm aware I may get no replies as I'm a newbie)

I need help in a few areas (aware I'm being cheeky emoticon)...my dd has a gastrostomy tube and I'm noe forever washing and anti-bac gelling my hands so they're very red, sore, dry and itchy and I would love some recommendations for a nice moisturising hand cream the ones I've tried seem to be really greasy.

I would also appreciate some general style/beauty advice I used to be quite confident but I feel I've lost all that a little since being a mummy. I often see people who look "done" even in just a t-shirt and jeans and I don't, am I destined to feel like a scruffbag or are there secrets? I look at these lovely colourful tops in the shops but I'm not sure what shapes or colours to go for, I'm a size 8/10 with little in the boob area, pale (slightly blotchy) skin and reddish hair.

A slightly hopeful thank-you

I use this on my hands when they get really sore, bit pricey but leaves my hands in great condition.

The Flexitol handcream is very good. My friend is a chef whose hands get quite dry and sore and she was really impressed when I lent her some. You only need a teeny tiny bit and if you do only use a bit, it isn't at all greasy.

Crabtree & Evelyn Avocado handcream is divine, non greasy and smells fabulous.

I think if you want to look 'done' you need to make sure your hair is well cut, your eyebrows are done, and you are wearing decent shoes and a non-scruffy bag.

gosh, how awful that you'd feel that you'd not get a response because you're a newbie ... I hope that cliquey attitude doesn't really exist on here??

Anyway .. I can't be much help in the hand department I'm afraid .... but as for general 'pulled togetherness' ... I'm no expert but I think the secrets are:

shiny hair, even if pulled pack in a pony
a smudge of eyemakeup and a smear of lip gloss
shiny skin (not in an oily way but in a dewy way if you get me .. check out the Oil Cleansing Method thread, it's a winner)
jeans can look great with the right top - esp as you are so slender .. and if you're small up top, you can wear halters really easily which look slightly dressier than the common garden variety T. Colours like chocolate and green sound like they'd work well with your colouring and also look great together.
Good accessories - whether it's just a few good bits of jewellery that you always wear or more colourful stuff ... stacked plastic bangles, for instance.

Also a good idea to buy a dress since they can be worn everywhere but just make you feel a bit more 'done' than jeans ... something like [http://www.oli.co.uk/Jasmine-Guinness-Daisy-Print-A-Line-Dress/productdisplay.stm?An=673&A=23H037%5 F8&N=673+697+715+4294965277+4294967158+4294963603&Au=P%5FMasterItem&Nu=P%5FMasterItem&Ns=P%5FColour% 7C0%7C%7CP%5FSize%7C0 this]] would suit your shape and is pretty enough to be worn by day with flip flops or dressed up a bit with a dressier shoe.

Speaking of shoes - I think that a pair of jeans and a top can look vastly more dressy if worn with, say, a metallic flat or colourful ballet pump, rather than trainers or flip flops for example.

You haven't really mentioned budget but I think one tip, when you;re experimenting with new looks, is to stick to cheap-ish yet colourful/ pretty options so that if you find that you don't feel good in them or whatever, you haven't wasted loads of money. Primark is a winner in that department I think (I bought £8 skinny jeans from there last year to 'break myself in' to the idea of wearing them, until I was ready to invest in a more expensive pair) Oli.co.uk is also good, esp at the moment with the sale on.

Hope this is some help

I just thought people may be more likely to reply if they "knew" the person iyswim? I didn't mean to be rude.

Thanks for the link to the handcream, I'll give it a go

LetThemEatCake I've noticed shiny hair but mine seems eternally dull, straighteners? Miracle conditioner? I'm ever hopeful for a miracle answer I think I need to invest in some jewellery, I never wear any. That dress is lovely, thank-you so much for the advice, I'm off to look at the oil cleansing method.

Thanks x

no no - not rude, you didn't sound rude! I was just saddened to think that you would feel reluctant to ask for advice

welcome, in any case

also, I second what the person above said about neat eyebrows. A regular threading session can work wonders. Better than Botox!! (erm, not that I have any basis for comparision)

what do you currently use on your hair?

hello lottie

lipstick
accessories - whatever works for you, bracelets, necklaces, scarves, earrings... then change to match outfit.
toes painted if on show and redone at least fortnightly if not weekly in high summer.
nice looking footwear, not dirty or worn.

my fingernails are ghastly because i too seem to wash hands a lot and they peel in water - a protein basecoast really helps.

Hi lottie, welcome to MN

From the sounds of it, you've got a good starting point, being slim, pale and reddish hair. Sounds good potential.

I'd second the decent hair cut idea. Makes a huge difference,
Eyebrows, as said elsewhere
And a smidge of make up. Do you get blotchy skin? Or are you a bit freckly? I get both so a light foundation just tends to even me out. Or maybe one of those tinted moisturiser things which develop into a light tan.

Good conditioners = Aussie, if you can stand the smell, or John Frieda Frizz Ease or Weatherworks.

I really rate the Body Shop Hemp Hand Protector - I don't find it greasy,but it's very rich. Quite a herbal smell though, but you get used to that.

And I'd second the advice about halter necks. Also slash necks can be good on your shape.

the best moisturiser i have used for my v dry skin is good old nivea

Do you wear make up?

I don't go out the house without any due ot being very pale with purple circles under my eyes- I look human with make up but dead without it.

If I had to use the bare minimum, it would be

• foundation- you sound young so maybe tinted mosituriser would be enough. *A bit of blusher- cream is easy and looks natural
• mascara *Eye pencil *Lippie/lip gloss

If you get it down to a fine art you can do it all in 5-7 minutes- my full make up including brows and eye shadow takes me 10 minutes.

Budget ranges are fine- Rimmel, L'Oreal, Bourgois.

Keep you hair well cut and clean.

A few accessories like a nice belt, earings, a bracelet etc can give you that finished look, even if you wear jeans.

mrsmerryweather, you're not mrsmerryhenry are you?

Your colours- I bet you'd look great in all blues, possibly greens and maybe a touch of yellow. Depends if your skin is pinky or peach toned.

I think you should avoid browns, blacks and navy colours as you are too pale.

You might look good in purple.

Buy some cheap T shirts and see which colours make you look alive, instead of washed out.

who is mrs merry henry?

she's another mumsnetter.
i thought for moment you were her.
as you were.

Hello Lottie, sorry to hear about your dd and her gastronomy tube, hope things improve for you in that respect. I second the bodyshop hemp hand cream, and also Aveeno cream which I bought in Boots - it has little bits in so its kind of a hand cream cum scrub thing!

Load of good advice above, but also, how about going for an appointment with a personal shopper. Debenhams do a service which is free with no obligation to buy anything, and you may just get some ideas about clothes/styles/colours that suit you which you may not have considered before.

LottieDugalo welcome!

I too felt a bit sad that you thought no one would reply because you're new - understand why though.

I agree with the eyebrows - I had mine done today after about a month of growth and it really does make such a difference. Where do you live? In London at least I can get mine done for £3!

The colour suggestions so far sound good - I'd go for greens and chocolates. I am a bit of a shopaholic but get as many compliments for my cheap clothes as I do for my expensive ones - I think it is a matter of what you chose, that colour and what you wear it with (why the italics?) For example I have a black dress from Peacocks which I paid £4 for. I wear it with nice snakeskin sandals and a nice watch and you'd never guess how much I paid for it.

It is also about colour in general IMO. I stick to greys, black, browns, beige with the occasional bold colours and it means most of my wardrobe fits together. Some people might think that is really bland but as a basis for adding fashion buys it is good. (I do like some non-bland things - I have a very weak spot for animal prints and am loving this season's fashions!)

I hardly use a handbag anymore but have a very nice baby bag (for baby's things not baby - she has a pram) which makes me feel less slummy mummy even when I am in baggy tracksuit bottoms and a vest.

One of the really nice things about the Style & Beauty threads on here is getting advice and a second (& 3rd and 4th!) opinion on things before you buy them if you can find the link on line (or take a photo of yourself in "it"). I never get to shop with mates anymore so it's great to have other women say "yes, that's great" (or otherwise)

Ooh what a long post with lots of random italics & punctuation - blame it on the heat!

Good luck - I hope you find some nice things which make you feel lovely.
MM

Thanks for the replies

Hmmm I've never plucked my eyebrows sounds like a good place to start, live in deepest Devon though and the average age must be about 70 so I suspect I may have to have a go myself.

My sister was horrified at the aging contents of my make-up bag recently, so I thought I might hit Boots and treat myself, it's only a small one so there's no make-up counters but whatever I get I'm sure will be a vast improvement. I have seen the protect and perfect stuff being raved about, I'll do a search in a minute, see if there are any threads.

I'd heard of Aveeno, is it easy to find?

I definitely used to wear more colour, I'm ogling the accesorize website too! If I'm not pushing my luck I will attempt to link to some things I like tomorrow, right now OH is complaining that I'm ignoring him in favour of the pc x

Post some links!

Good night

I got the Aveeno in Boots, but from the sounds of things, our branch might be slightly bigger than yours! (Not huge though).

I have attempted to a put a photo on my profile , not sure if it's worked, not very computer literate.

Thank-you again x

Hi,

It says that you have no page. Perhaps you need to check your privacy seetings?

Crap, have I done it now?