Help me write a funny comment to help me get on the Gok Wan programme!

[Saucepanman]

Please

I went on the C4 website to see if there were details of applying for the next series of Gok's fashion fix, couldnt find anything but there is a comments section which some people have used to beg plead their case. I want to write something witty and memorable on the off chance these are looked at.

Basically I am 31, trying hard to do slimming world, 2 kids 6 and 3, I wear jeans every day, have hoarded loads of clothes that I have desperate dreams of fitting in again one day. Also looking for a job after 2 yrs off, need inspiration! Oh I also need a catchy screen name, no way am I posting my name in case someone I know sees it!

So far I have written this:

I am 31 and struggling to find interesting and flattering clothes. I have lots of clothes stashed that I vaguely hope I might slim into one day, probably the longest washing line you would ever do on your programme! I am trying to find a job after 2 years as a stay at home mum and need to know what to wear for work and the school run.

but know it is crap! Any help would be appreciated. TIA

Perhaps you could mention that you have great bangers and want to look bang on trend, girlfriend!!

If you get on, give him a hug and a "you're the best man in the world; I desperately want to be your Best Friend Forever" from me?

You have given him a good brief of what you need clothes for...I think you need a clear theme/reason about why you are struggling without Gok at the moment...hoarding clothes to slim back into is a story lots of people can identify with so this is good - I think you need something else interesting to make you stand out though.

what do you wear at the moment?
Eg your dp's clothes
only the colour grey
a 24 piece capsule wardrobe consisting of 20 pairs of jeans and 4 fluoro tshirts

which celeb do you look like now & which one do you want to look like?

What would you like people to think about you based on the way you dress?

Do you have any particular issues with your figure?

Podrick I am just off out for my wedding anniversary, but will read and respond more later if not too drunk! Thanks for your fab ideas

Have a lovely evening !

Gok is interested when peoples' clothes do not reflect their personalities...what do your clothes say about your personality and what is the truth?

You really want all your friends, children/family, their friends , and workmates and neighbours to have the image of you in the altogether imprinted in their minds forever? And texting each other the link on Youtube going 'oooh look at saucepanman's wobbly arse...!'?

Rather you than me girlfriend...

And you're looking for a job? So the people interviewing you might see it too?

It's a different programme to the one you're thinking of LL