Would you colour gray hair for a job search in your 50s? Cut suggestions welcome too.

[TwoYearsTooMany]

I'm lucky to be in a full time job, but it's incredibly stressful (I know everyone says this, but it's quite specific in a mental health setting with physical attacks happening - although I have been hurt myself, what has ultimately broken my resilience is not being able to protect vulnerable people in my care, as sometimes things genuinely happen completely "out of the blue", which means I spend nine hours a day on high alert mentally).

Anyway, two weeks ago something happened again and I kept going two more days and then just couldn't.

So I need to find a new job. I have an in demand qualification but I'm in my 50s...

Also the stress has really got to me, in combination with menopause and a couple of recently surfaced health issues, and I've put on quite a lot of weight, plus I haven't been to the hairdressers for at least a year...

I sound like a real catch for an employer 🫣

I need to do something to make myself feel a bit more presentable as I apply for jobs. I'm not in an office based career sonI don't need to look corporate, I need to look capable, rather than frazzled and fed up. I am actually very good at my job, I'm just in a situation where I've begun to feel hopeless and helpless.

So - I have long straggling grey hair. I can do something about this at least.

Would you colour it? I haven't coloured since before the pandemic and don't care on a personal-life level whether it is ageing BUT if I'm interviewing for active jobs I probably should be looking dynamic, and if not "youthful" at least not significantly older than I am...

Suggestions for cut? Do I have to revert to the bob of doom? Unfortunately I have a round face and I'm not remotely elven - proper short doesn't work on me.

Any hair suggestions to give me a lift back into presenting myself positively?

Maybe try getting it cut a tiny bit shorter and have some shape put back into it and then seeing what you think re colour. Sorry to hear things have been difficult.

Thank you, this is probably the sensible suggestion!
I'm thinking that the one thing I can completely change in an afternoon is my hair - but that might be a mistake!

The bob of doom sounds better than long straggling hair (your words) so definitely get a hair cut. Are there any famous people or friends with hair styles you like, or look through a magazine or online for ideas.

I’m sure there’s some middle ground between what you’ve got now and the bob of doom! You’re right that it’s a fairly quick and easy fix that can make a lot of difference. I really need to get mine done too!

So a cut first, but equally, a good colourist might be able to add some kind of cheeky highlights. So not all over tint but something brightening.

Clothes - Make sure you have some clothes that you look and feel great in, even with increased weight. Ensure your shoes don't distract
Bad teeth are ageing - get to the dental hygienist if needed
Older skin can be sallow / grey - consider something like Chanel's Les Beiges gel cream bronzer. Just pop on a bit with your fingers and it adds a lovely glow. Lasts ages and can almost replace a foundation

Good luck!!!!

How are your eyebrows, getting them threaded and tinted can be a good and relatively inexpensive quick fix?

If you are fully grey, maybe embrace that ((saves the upkeep!) and have some sort of highlights put in rather than a full head. If you feel your wardrobe needs a revamp maybe (if affordable) book a session with a stylist at a big department store ?

Do what I did recently - take a photo of yourself and ask Copilot (or your AI tool of choice) and have fun playing about with it to get suggestions for a cut and/or colour. It's quite impressive what it comes up with!

Well i think there’s a few things that you can do. Assuming you’re happy with your greys then I’d just go for a fresh cut. There are many styles of mid length hair that are not “ the bob of doom “. There are a couple of hairdressers I follow on SM who cut hair on older women and do an excellent job so I can give you their names if you want inspiration.

I know you didn’t ask about make up but I think you can look a bit glowy with just a couple of products. A nicely moisturised face, a bit of cream blusher and tinted lip balm help me to feel a bit more pulled together and may help you going into interview situations.

PS. Make sure your CV doesn’t have your age on.

I think well cut grey hair is very fashionable and it makes women look comfortable in their own skin. It looks great if you have the right glasses and accessories. I think sometimes people still go with the accessories and clothes that suited their original hair colour. A few new scarves and earrings and a haircut might be all you need.

A trip to the hairdressers day of if possible so you have a fresh out of the salon look. If not then at least a tidy up at the hairdressers and maybe some nice hair treatment.

pre interview agree with some self care, you don’t have to spend a fortune but regular daily skincare can work wonders as we age. Hydrating masks, vitimin c products for brightening your skin.

tidy your eyebrows, tint and fill in and a bit of mascara to widen your eyes can make a big difference on making you look younger.

I’m 50, and every 8-9 weeks I get my hair tinted a darker blonde on the roots with a t-section or half head of blonde highlights on that.
I’m useless at doing my own colour as I’m quite colourblind lol.
My natural colour now is dark blonde with grey & white through it, which I just don’t like.

I keep my hair basically just on my shoulders so not as short as a bob. Then I can still clip it up quickly for work. Bobs are fine but they do need more styling than slightly longer hair.

I work with many women aged 18 up to 65, the vast majority are not grey / colour their hair, & wear make up, so I do feel the need to keep up, also I’d like to meet a man for a relationship & I’m aware that my age is an issue so I want to look young(ish).

I do feel that it’s a competitive job market right now so yes, it probably would be helpful to sort your hair out, so look at the reviews online for the local hair salons, then choose one for a consultation.

A very positive thing about you@TwoYearsTooMany is that you know you are good at your job.. so try to keep that in mind and maintain that confidence in your skills and ability when applying for other jobs.
You have the experience and knowledge to do well in future! Just remember to include each point on the job description & specification in your personal statement when you do your job application; especially if they use Trac. As this gets scored and you only get interviewed if you get the right score.
I had 2 interviews last year using that advice, for the only 2 jobs I applied for. I was 2nd choice for one job, but was beaten by the top candidate’s experience. I then decided to stay in my original job.
Try not to use much AI in applications as there are lots of ‘tells’ and some interviewers don’t like it I’ve heard.
I would say dress smartly even for social care jobs or similar. I wore wide leg black trousers with a fitted River Island boucle cardigan & black ballet pumps to my interviews, I did see one woman in a tracksuit which I was puzzled by, maybe that’s ok now but I prefer to look smarter.

A scarf is a good idea. Little satin squares are everywhere at the moment and can easily brighten up a plain top or dress.

I think you’re right that grey hair will mean you’re more likely to experience ageism. So in your shoes, rightly or wrongly, I would definitely get a great cut and colour.

I would actually OP - and I say that as someone who likes grey hair.

I just think several things are going on here and this change is going to be as much about how able you feel to mentally extricate yourself from a tricky situation and put it behind you for the interview as it is about someone meeting you for the first time and - naturally enough when you have little to go on - making some relatively superficial judgments in a short space of time.

I just sense you are needing a fresh break generally, and this is as much about you.

I'd do it! It will feel bizarrely emboldening - as though you are in someone else's body for the interview, which might be fun! I'd go for a dramatic change over a timid one and I actually think a Bob of Doom usually looks quite professional and not too aging, especially when freshly cut, which yours will be.

I am actually in a very similar situation (although no physical injury, that is much harder - all very, very best for job change and recovery Op).

My cv didn't give much away date-wise. I was selected for telephone interview. That went fine and obviously they couldn't see me or guess my age. Next one a video call and no time to do anything with hair, so just tied back & dressed smartly - I assumed my obvious age might be a bit of a shock to the person who would be the line manager, but it seems I have another interview! Such a boost, even if I don't get the job, as I was convinced my appearance/age would be a major barrier. I know from past experience that I struggle to keep up with re-growth, but was seriously considering if I would need a total makeover to be in the running. I am so relieved that greying hair appears to not have made a difference (at least so far) and even if I don't get this role I have decided I am just going to keep being me, but treat myself to more cuts. AI tells me that a visible sign of age signals experience and gravitas worth paying for, so I've decided to believe it & rock it 😂🤣!

Someone whose hair cut and natural colour I admire recommended a little of this stuff on wet hair, even dried naturally, or a smidgen on dry hair. A little seems to smooth and hold and maybe give the grey/white a touch of gloss - TRESemmé Hair Care Volumising Balm Heat Defence 70ml. On offer at Boots atm.

Take care & Good Luck whatever look you decide!

I recently changed my hair colour for an interview. Back to close to my original. So nothing too unnatural. I hate it ! I'd bot realised how much I appreciate the softness of grey. I'd change it with an AI or something first. I really regret going back to colour now

How about the bob but not the colour OP?

I like a bob for this kind of thing, and it is a style that suits grey hair.

ETA but I just sense you are needing a "fresh start" vibe. For me, it is as much about giving you a reboot mentally as impressing the interviewer. I recently got a health issue sorted, not a threatening one, just something I had put off which was a check on a freckle which had changed. I had kept putting it off because I always seem to be taking dc to the gp and looking after them and making appointments for everyone. But I felt great all afternoon, and not just because the GP was not worried, but because I just felt like I was kind of turning the ship round by getting MY non urgent appointment wedged into the family diary.)