Drab but lost

[Roundbutsquaretoo]

I'm 32, but clothes are increasingly more difficult to wear without driving me mad.
In my twenties I lived in skirts/dresses with tights for work and skinny jeans with vest tops with high heeled boots, size 8-10. A couple of years ago I gained just over a stone all on my belly and I cannot get rid of it, so now I'm a 12 but waist bands cut my tummy into a muffin top.
Tights drive me round the bent and I detest being cold, so my wardrobe goes as follows:
Height of heat: plain coloured t-shirt dresses or loose fit jump suits with trainers
18+25 degrees Leggings/Skinny jeans with a loose fit t-shirt and trainers
Anything below 18 degrees: Leggings/Skinny jeans with long sleeve t-shirts and jumpers or cardigans, with trainers or flat boots if I'm feeling dressier

I work with children and spend a lot of time on the floor so no longer need skirts/dresses for work, and I have 28J boobs which have grown a lot in the last two years so most clothes sit wrong on top.
I have to buy shapeless laced bras because there's no such thing as a moulded bra in my size so I feel uncomfortable before I'm even dressed.

I also have a hair loss problem, which has knocked my confidence in how I look. But mostly I just dress to be comfortable and practical! Which looks dreadful, frumpy and sad. I don't want my daughter to feel sorry for me when she looks at me as a teenager.
Is there hope for me?
I have an event I need to dress up for next week and if it wasn't so important I'd cancel going just so I don't have to try and find something to wear.

Just giving this a little bump for you, OP. Hopefully some of our lovely M'Netters will spot your thread soon and be along with plenty of support, advice and shared experiences.

Best wishes,
Faye
MNHQ.

Ok, that's a lot of stuff that you don't like about yourself. What do you like? You're not exactly elephant sized, a size 12 is perfectly normal.

What shopping areas do you have access too? Are you in a city or deeply rural?

You also don't say how tall you are?

Brastop has loads of bras in a 28J cup including moulded cups.

You are a size 12 but you don’t say how tall you are of what sort of style you want to wear. If you feel you are an apple shape and don’t want to have things tight on your waist then midi dresses with tights in a size above what you would normally wear might be more comfortable, or snag tights which you can buy to fit any size. Maybe jumper dresses if you feel the cold, if they are midi you could still bend down, sit on the floor etc.
There are loads of jersey stretchy waist trousers and jeans out this year from next, marks and Spencer’s and halara which might suit. I have a big tummy for my size and have a couple of styles which I could link ?

for your hair, what are you doing to help this? There have been a few threads recently on thinning hair which is common with those on WLIs so you could search them for som ideas, but I recommend taking an iron supplement and a biotin supplement, and also Pantene scalp hair growth serum.

what is the event, if you start a thread saying more about it, people often share links and ideas they have.

there is hope, and you can have a restyle, you are only 32 and a size 12 so I bet you look great if you can get some clothes to suit your shape.

There seems to be a lot of changes to your appearance in the last few years, so may be worth a GP chat if you haven’t already. 32 not a typical age for significant change.

Other than that, loose the skinny jeans/legging style as it looks dated and hard to even out proportions. Baggier jeans/trousers with trainers and a nice T-shirt (not tight but tucked in to show where your waist is) and a bright cardigan or jumper. Some gold jewellery, a decent haircut and you’ll look and feel 👌 Look at some Instagram inspiration - maybe some of the influencers tagged by the brand ‘Beyond Nine’ is a good place to start.

Firstly, I would suggest Bravissimo for bras. I haven’t bought a bra from anywhere else for about 20 years. Book an appointment and go to a store. They will spend as long as you need to find something that you are happy with. Once your bra fits properly, your clothes will hang completely differently.

Secondly, as a pp has suggested, lose the leggings and skinny jeans. If you are top heavy, you will be exaggerating that even more by wearing tightly fitting bottoms. M&S do jersey wide leg trousers for about £20. They are as comfy, if not more so, than leggings.

Get yourself some nice trainers. I wear either Adidas sambas or platform Converse hi-tops. I find the platform balances out my top half a little and I find them more comfy than the flat ones.

Add a tucked in T-shirt to show where your waist is and you’re good to go. You can be comfortable and practical but still look good.

How dressy is the event you are going to? I’ve got a couple of really lovely jumpsuits recently for dressy events that I’m happy to recommend.

Thank you to everyone for your replies.
To answer some questions, I'm only 5ft 1!
I do have a regime of serums and vitamins with my hair loss but unfortunately it's probably genetic. If anyone can recommend any good hair toppers I'd be keen to trial those as my thinning is all at the front and quite noticeable now.
I shop online mostly
I've had several bravissimo bras, sadly don't have much luck with them but Bra Stop is okay
Any recommendations for jumpsuits fitting bigger busts I'd gratefully receive

I would recommend getting a full thyroid panel from thriva or similar and then going to your GP!

You can get a thyroid test from your GP but they don't cover everything and you have to take your results home and Google the optimal ranges rather than what the NHS deem normal - because you could be half dead before they say you have an issue with most things.

I would recommend getting a full thyroid panel from thriva or similar and then going to your GP!

You can get a thyroid test from your GP but they don't cover everything and you have to take your results home and Google the optimal ranges rather than what the NHS deem normal - because you could be half dead before they say you have an issue with most things.