Should i get married in jeans or make an effort?

[pleasekeepmeanonymous1]

Hi,

Im getting married in early October. Really simple wedding: me, my partner and my parents.

Im really struggling to figure out what to wear. I fully intended on just going in jeans but my partner is keen to dress smarter, so I feel like I should too.

I do NOT want to wear white/ivory and I don't do floral prints. Apart from that im pretty open to anything, im 35, size 6-8 and 5ft 4. It doesn't have to be a dress either, open to trousers etc. Budget £100, but will also be scouring vinted for bargains 😅

Anybody got any ideas?

how about something like this? Simple but glam? https://www.nobodyschild.com/products/naz-midi-dress-2617033001?variant=55515059028353&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Nobodys_Child-UK-PMax-All-DT%2BTA-SE-ePmax-Tier+1&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=19229866515&gbraid=0AAAAADQCJIVmpe_Xe-UNkZK687ONDF4F4&gclid=Cj0KCQjw16_UBhCqARIsAIdOaXw-R-YeTkr1g4ST7cq6d9Mh8pNnpbVis2A1m7z-Fc5-2S8WHWOlJlkaAu5eEALw_wcB

Surely it’s just as romantic for an established, committed couple to want to secure the future of their family as it is for a newer couple - who may be divorced in five years time - to throw a big wedding party?

You have something to be proud of and to celebrate, @pleasekeepmeanonymous1 - I don’t understand why you seem so keen to downplay that.

I’d wear something utterly fabulous that you probably wouldn’t wear in a different situation. Something with sequins I think!

Not keen to downplay, I am incredibly happy and proud of what we have. I don't think we need to do anything big and what other people see as romantic to confirm it.

A big party isnt us, a small, simple ceremony is all we need because we have everything we want already, two amazing children and a lovely comfortable life together full of adventures. Id rather spend the money on doing something great and memorable with the kids than throw a party for us.

Love this

IMO regardless of the reasons I think it’s still worth making an effort, if nothing else just so you both have a nice photo out of it.

Cant help with the outfit part because it’s really vague. If you don’t want white I’d just dress up in something I love.

My BiL and SiL did this - there were 10 of us there.

what I would say is that up until the day it was referred to as nothing. It was legal, it had no meaning (they did have a big “wedding” a few months later but had to do the legal bit first) and was going to be nothing but a piece of paper to them with no emotional attachment.

they now both say that it meant far more to them on that day than they ever expected.

so I’m on team “buy that glorious red dress and embrace it”!

I wasn’t saying you should have a big party, @pleasekeepmeanonymous1!

Just that emotionally you seemed a bit uninterested in the ceremony altogether.

But if you are actually happy to be getting married - everything flows from that.

And Congratulations!

We got married in a registry office with just our parents there too, OP. Like you, purely administrative.

We both wore jeans and a T-shirt the same as we would for any other administrative paper-signing. It was fine and I have no regrets about not 'making an effort' at all.

If you liked the odea of pyjamas why not go with something similar? A lovely pyjama style elevated co-ord in a silky fabric and a print you love (River Island, Marks and spencers have some nice ones) with a pair of nice shoes or boots and jewellery, or a super comfy draped jumpsuit in jersey in a colour that suits you (have a look at Halara-they are so comfortable they feel like pyjamas, and they even sell some you can easily go for a wee in)

either can be worn again if you get a print or colour you love

I know you said no white / ivory, but a friend of mine got married in a very similar set up to what you’ve mentioned and wore a white tailored jumpsuit and looked sensational. So maybe a jewel coloured one? It would be nice to look slightly different from a normal day but you have to feel comfortable

I was thinking this too OP- if you like the relaxed, comfortable fit and look of a pjs style you can still have something absolutely beautiful and special. There are so many gorgeous silky options!

How about something like this or this?

Congratulations!

Edited as link didn't work :)

Love this idea! Will definitely have a look around 😊

Just think of it as a great excuse to buy a new outfit that you love, rather than a wedding outfit, per se. Even if that’s a fab new pair of jeans and gorgeous top.