Good lord I nearly died

[IAteRosemaryConleyForBreakfast]

A woman just walked past my house with a Kermit the Frog rucksack. It was Kermit shaped, with dangly arms and legs. A grown woman!

And cords! how do you expect to sneak up on kidults with your sack, in cords? They'd hear you coming a mile away.

[shakes head sadly]

You don't understand, coco. These are the sort of cords which are so old that the material where my thighs chafe is like gossamer.