Is 'dont wear white for a wedding' known about other than on here?

[LeopardPrintFleece]

I've always known it's not the thing to do but now I wonder if I read it on here - been here a looooong time!

I only ask because my DD's MIL is apparently wearing predominantly white for their wedding and DD thinks she doesnt know it's inappropriate. DD does know but possibly from listening to me!

FWIW neither of us are particularly bothered - I dont think it's like one of those MILs you see in the DM where it looks like an actual wedding dress but I wonder if other guests will be a bit 😯

She’s not in the photo?
She wasn’t invited.

I did once have an acquaintance who commented on it every time she saw a guest wearing white at a wedding. She once even approached someone wearing white at a wedding and told her it wasn't the done thing. That was weird and awkward. I would never wear white at a wedding anyway, but especially not if that acquaintance was there!

Telling a guest their clothing is inappropriate is a far worse faux pas than wearing white. Etiquette is suppose to make people comfortable, not a stick to beat them with.

I think it was a joke 😁

Oops, sorry!! ☺️
(I still don’t get it though, probably just me😅)

Isn't it daft. My former manager got married in a beautiful long spring-green dress. I'm guessing she's not superstitious, and the marriage seems to have held so far... 😄

It was really weird and so awkward!

This sounds like the woman I know! Really weird and about a million miles less polite than wearing the 'wrong' colour

I had never heard of the no white rule until I came on here 15 years ago. I'm 78 and have been married 54 years. It always makes me smile when I read it because my sister, who was my bridesmaid, actually wore a quite simple white dress to my wedding. We had been dress shopping together at a bridal store and trying on all sorts of styles. I chose my dress, the one she bought was there and we both liked it, so she tried it on. Looked fabulous, so I said "why not buy it and use as a bridesmaid's dress" - so she did! Nobody commented at all. I was happy that she'd found something that she liked.

The bridesmaids can wear white, it is the guests that are supposed to refrain from it.

Bridesmaids wear whatever the bride is happy with and white bridesmaids dresses aren't unusual. Guests outside the bridal party should not wear white.

It’s known about. My MIL wore cream, bordering on white. Which was intentional I’m sure as her grandsons weren’t invited to the wedding. She definitely knows the etiquette.

Never heard of not wearing a dress with the slightest bit of white to a wedding apart from on MN.

Apparently you'll be disrespectful and obviously hate the bride 😅

I have never heard of being considered disrespectful or considered to hate the bride just for wearing a dress with the slightest bit of white either 😲! That's quite mad 😅.

Tbf, I also haven't seen that said by even the strictest people on Mumsnet...

I thought it was mainly just dresses with a white (or nearly white) background or, obviously, all white.

A navy dress with small white flowers, I would wear, for example. And, (for myself only - don't care what anyone else does), I'm fairly strict about not wearing white dresses as a wedding guest.

But, a white dress navy flowers, I would not wear. Or a white dress with big pink flowers. You get the idea!

My rule for myself is, if someone asked me what what I was planning to wear and if I was describing my dress, if I naturally said "it's a white/cream/off-white dress with....", or "it's a white background with...", for me, that would be one to avoid. But if I said, "it's a blue/pink/orange/purple/whatever colour dress with some white flowers/lace/spots/details", then it would be fine (for me)

I'm reading an Anne Tyler book at the moment and her daughter gets married in green. No mention of the dress not being white in the book. However, it's a marriage starting off on a rocky foot so could be intentional by Tyler to have a green dress.

@Waterwaterwaterwaterwatercycle I can assure you the comments about being disrespectful and hating the bride were actually said on here a couple of weeks ago!

For wearing something with the slightest bit of white on it? That's bonkers 😂😂

There are some very...um...passionate people here on Mumsnet

Yes, the dress was mainly other colours with odd patches of white here and there

That's shocking 😲

People are weird.

You've got me curious now 😂, was it the red they objected to or the wee tiny bits of white? Either way, those comments are craaaaazzzy!!

I definitely knew white wasn't appropriate to a wedding. I'm now thinking I possibly made a big wedding faux pas. I wore a dress similar to the photo to 2 weddings I went to while pregnant around a decade ago. It was an emergency purchase as my bump was too big for the dress I had. Only reading this thread it occured to me that it might not have been seen as appropriate. Not sure why it didn't occur to me at the time. What do people think?

Photo doesn't seem to have sent, here is thie link:

https://www.duskfashion.com/dusk-abstract-twist-maxi-dress-14894008

Looks absolutely fine to me @Jupitersdaughter and very pretty.

@Carrotleek Thank you. Hope the brides thought so too. Either way I guess there's not much I can do about it now

Agree.

What would Geri Halliwell do? Do you think she turns down wedding invitations?

Same.

If it is a thing I've never worn white at a wedding (including my own) because I never wear white.

As for all these guests talking about another guest or "giving her the side eye" (hate that expression), honestly get a life, or just try enjoying the wedding.