In all honesty I'd never given it much thought till I saw the froth on MN about it. I mean, obviously an outfit that specifically looks bridal in addition to being pale is a no-no, but I can honestly say that when I got married I took precisely zero notice of the paleness or otherwise of people's attire, I was just happy to have my loved ones around me.
It's different obviously if the bride and groom have issued any dress code stipulations - although I personally find dress codes annoyingly prescriptive, I would never ignore a dress code, that's just respect. But even when there's apparently no dress code to a wedding, on MN I've seen various versions of 'The bride won't want you wearing pale stuff, it's THE RULE, you mustn't ask her if she has any preference, it's THE RULE, even if she says she doesn't care if you turn up dressed as a zebra, you mustn't because zebras are part white and it's THE RULE and if you turn up in a pale colour you'll spoil the photos/entire day and everyone will think you are socially clueless/inconsiderate, because it's THE RULE! How can you not know it's THE RULE?' It honestly seems as though some people are just so rigidly adherent to this convention that the mere thought of it being bucked, even if the actual bride doesn't care, is enough to give them the vapours.
I honestly think a lot of it is centred around weddings now being perceived as having to look Insta-perfect for the photos, but I hope I'm wrong as the thought saddens me. Weddings should be about celebrating with your nearest and dearest, not what shades of clothing people are wearing. If it seems as though I'm getting in a bit of a froth myself on the topic, I guess I am, because would anyone ever subject a man to these sort of strictures around wedding attire (or, in the case of most men, even give a hoot what people are wearing?) No, of course they wouldn't. It always seems to be women judging other women where this kind of thing is concerned, and it depresses me.