Wedding dress for obese, short mid-50s

[SilverVixen101]

Hiya

After over 20 years together DP and I have finally decided to get married. Originally for tax/inheritance reasons (we have two kids) but we've agreed we want to have a great party for all our friends.

The only other bit I know I want is a splendid wedding dress. I am well known for having a very glamorous/avant garde approach to fashion. The problem is my figure is quite a challenge these days to present attractively - so please can I have some advice.

I am 5ft with an obese BMI. I am almost completely spherical and with big boobs (32H) My waist still goes in at the sides but at the front I look heavily pregnant (though at mid-50s that is obviously not the case). Even for my stature my legs are disproportionately short (I can't wear long boots because the cut into my thighs at the back when I sit down). My wrists have become very chunky and so my arms don't look good. I can't show my back because I have a long row of birth marks between my shoulder blades that I hate. My cleavage is quite nice but I am getting very wrinkly there these days and my neck folds are awful.

Please can anyone suggest a flattering style? Any colour will do - white/red/black/pink/green. I'm keen for it to look over the top/bridal. My ideal dress is Carrie's Vivienne Westwood one in SitC. I think I want a massive veil or maybe hat as well because I am balding.

I have presented a rather unflattering portrait of myself here but I know I can still look fabulous - as I manage it all the time - I just wanted to be realistic about what I am dealing with!

Have a look on this site..is there anything there that would give you inspiration? https://www.houseofmooshki.com/dress-categories/all-dresses/page/2/

Possibly because they don't know that's what they are? Anyway @ParmaVioletTea did not suggest the dress shown, she used it to show what she meant by slightly off the shoulder and how a shawl collar is flattering. She suggested OP choose an empire-line dress.

Yes - posters always ‘pick the site at random to show’ whatever. Always scam sites.

These dresses are fabulous! I think getting something made to measure would be ideal, and it sounds like you've got the budget for it so I'd definitely be reaching out to this company.

Bombshell London by Katya Wildman and also Scarlett and Jo dresses are my go to dresses with a similar figure to you

Congratulations on getting married, OP!

As someone else mentioned, fit is the key to looking good, especially if you are a “non standard” height and shape.

I would find a good dress maker and either pay for a dress to be made to your exact size and shape and specifications, or if that is out of your price range, pay to have anything you buy off the peg tailored. I had my wedding dress made and have my work suits which are bought from normal stores, tailored to fit me perfectly. The difference is extraordinary and even the off the peg tailored suits garner compliments. I am reasonably slim, but short with odd proportions - small shoulders, short upper body, oddly long legs, wide hips etc. You would never know it when I am in my tailored clothes but it is glaringly obvious when I am in normal off the peg clothes!

I agree that with a £2k budget (and your experience of shopping off the peg) getting something made for you would be by far the best and most satisfying option.

This looks amazing. Not my style at all but joyful to look at all those pictures.

https://fancifuldoll.com/products/plains-of-elysium-duchess-gown
Vertical ott but I live it. Lots of gothic style dresses in their collection too

Maybe it's a bit out there, but it could be just what you are after...check out Fumbalinas. I ordered one of their sequin kaftans after seeing Lauren Laverne wear one presenting Glastonbury and honestly it makes me feel AMAZING!! The low v neck really shows off the clavicle and it drapes beautifully...
Sequins – Fumbalinas

Or Winifred Rose for a similar vibe...
WINIFRED ROSE

Both would do alterations on length, but then you might want to go with fabulous heels!

June - September

I agree. I've never been a white wearer - through all my styles. Starting with goth aged 14-17.

size 14-18.
The Bra size is my 'BOB - Boob or Bust' size which is an excellent group of women dedicated to ensuring women wear proper fitting bras. Almost everyone wears bands too large and cups too small.

My stomach is enormous though - I look like I've a beach ball stuffed up there.

Yes I wondered about that. I wasn't suggesting that @SilverVixen101 buy that dress, as there are things which wouldn't work for her, but it was just a visual for the off-the-shoulder style I was suggesting.

I said I had no idea about the brand, but it was a picture that demonstrated the style I was suggesting. I don't buy clothes generally, I make my own, or have them made for me. So the online dress adverts are just ideas about design for me.

Sheesh! Try to help, and get blasted ...

Apologies @ParmaVioletTea - I suspect people don't actually read the accompanying text, just click on links - I didn't want anyone to buy from there.

I'd look for a good local dressmaker @SilverVixen101 who can advise on style, cut & fabric, made to measure just for you.

Fair enough. I didn't do due diligence on the link.

Obviously, I don't know much about buying actual dresses online (although I recognise Shein & Temu).

If I had the money, oh and if I had a fiance!!

Uptight Clothing

It might be too traditional but you could visit Curves & Couture in Essex and see if anything takes your fancy. It might at least help you narrow down the shape you like.

@SilverVixen101 congratulations! You need something to really accentuate your hair colour when choosing the dress. BTW can you give us more information on BOB please from a 44G?

You say you can still look fabulous. That’s where you start. Put on your favourite outfit. Get an honest friend to photo you from every angle and then if you still love yourself in the pics go with the same style, but elevate it. This can be fabric, embroidery, jewellery, an absolute humdinger of a hat. You will feel great, and look happy and we all know a smiling bride is the most beautiful. Congratulations.

https://fancifuldoll.com/products/jade-nocturne-pompadour-corset

I don't think she was. She gave some very good and thoughtful advice and just showed the type of style she meant.
If you read her post you will see she suggests OP has her dress made not that she buys from that site

I was lucky to have both - and had the most amazing experience - felt like a princess! Couldn't sit down, mind you but it was worth it. She is the most lovely lady. Never been braless before or since!