I've just got back from five days in Le Marais, and I've decided I want become Parisian, s'il vous plait.

[TossDaily]

So there.

EVERYBODY looked fantastic. EVERYBODY. DP and I just sat open-mouthed in fascination. Whatever their age, they looked amazing.

So I'm sitting here on a diet, wearing an Isabel Marant jumper and frantically googling 'How to turn French.'

As far as I can tell, the rules are:

1. Be thin, despite the fact you are walking down the street at 11am gnawing a cheese and ham baguette the length of your forearm.

1. Have your hair the colour and texture of natural hair.

1. Have the most amazing skin, despite the fact you have a permanent Gauloise on the go.

1. Never get pissed and lairy, despite the fact you are having a glass of red wine with your lunch and it's Tuesday.

1. Wear shoes you can walk in.

1. Have an amazing coat.

1. Know how to tie a scarf so it looks like you have slung it on and it's just choosing to snuggle up to you because you are SO FRICKING GORGEOUS.

1. Have a pharmacy on every corner that is just an Aladdin's Cave of miraculous skincare delights for less than a tenner each.

Anyone else have any tips? Joking aside, I loved the style - the shops, ohmigod the shops! It was like I'd walked into my internet shopping history.

I could actually walk around in my biker jacket without feeling like a twat.

I want to be French. Aidez-moi.

I've just started watching Call My Agent based on all your recommendations (love it) - what was the other series that was mentioned about 20 pages ago? Thanks

Look what I got today - in Fraser's, where the Dior sales woman, Hayley, was lovely and did my lipstick before I bought. She confirmed that the satin effect the word I couldn't remember yesterday when I kept on saying "shiny" effect 999 was best on me - and refuted the idea that it would bleed and wouldn't last

(And no, Botemps - I don't skip to the end of a book - it's just I'm enjoying this thread too much )

Witnesses or Temoins, ksb, the other one was Spiral, I think? I've started on witnesses but the fashion is less of a prominent display than on CMA. In that show it's like a supportive cast member, I love how they group together overlapping styles and colour to display the different ranks and touches on the manner in which French businesses are still quite hierarchical. First pic is the assistants all in pattern and blue, despite their varying ages they all look a bit young, and the second pic are all the (partner) sharks
agents in shades of steely grey.

Proper, that type of French woman is hard to collate aesthetically but they share an attitude towards style. I tend to group the Parisian tribes more along those lines most of the time, rather than that they wear very similar things. As far as attitudes go, I quite like the recalcitrant one, it's really not about pleasing anyone but yourself. It shows in body language too, she takes up as much space as she wants rather than makes room for someone else, in response, everyone seems to make room for her too.

Nothing I hate more than being sold something which isn't in stock, Holger

Right, I need to clear out my eBay watch list as it's full, is anyone interested in what I'm tossing out? It'll mostly be a size or two too big for me and realistically I'm not going to be buying it and then have it altered, or I've kept it as a possibility but I've bought something else instead, some of it will just be too ladylike for me but I kept in there as I just liked the look of it. Happy to post the links on here if people are interested. I plan to start on it tonight but more realistically I'll get to it tomorrow.

Oh, that little Dior bag is stupidly gratifying, isn't it? Chanel is just as bad, you don't want to own up to being this luxury label whore but then they hand over that little paper bag beautifully wrapped up and it delights you beyond reason nonetheless and you end up swinging it just a little too excitedly in your hands as you walk.

I would take a look at your rejects botemp

muubaa has been ok for me. Perhaps I was lucky- or not many people want a bight green leather jacket-proabaly the latter.

I need to find earrings and a scarf to go with the jacket-will look back at your suggestions bo.

I am covering my eyes from any more lists. I am too easily swayed baaa.
For a moment I thought you were selling all you watches bo!

Oh - and we went up to John Lewis a bit later but dh wouldn't let me walk ostentatiously past the Dior counter, swinging my Fraser's Dior bag

Thanks botemp. I'm back taking French lessons (after a very long time) and these are perfect easy watching to help with that too.

For those sitting on their hands, avert eyes now

The Rejects Pile (in parts)

Coats

Carven Coat FR38 £144.93, German seller, like new, returns not accepted- for the love of all things holy and French will someone please buy this so I can stop obsessing over it. It’s two sizes too big for me and it’s an oversized fit and far too complicated to take in. But I desperately WANT it. It has not been helped with the internet procured knowledge that Rooney Mara (as pictured) is roughly the same height as me. It would have been well over a €1000 RRP and it’s hardly been worn, if at all.

Isabel Marant Manteau Parka Kaki Fausse Fourrure Coat Oversized taille 0=S/M £192.66, French seller, used, returns not accepted, open for offers. Perfect example of the Parisian parka with the flurry of shearling. It needs a bit of TLC though, a good pressing and a specialist clean for the shearling, though you could risk it with a DIY. It’s actually two coats in one so both can be worn on their own. Oversized so should fit up to a M with ease. It’s the old IME label with the star still on the label and those were consistently of higher quality than what she churns out these days.

SOYER CHARLESTON BEIGE COAT MEDIUM £225.00 UK seller, new, returns accepted. A really nice coat I had my eye on, just not my size.

Coats Part II

Ladies Each X Other Soft Sheep Skin Leather Biker Jacket Olive XL RRP £825 BNWT £149.00, UK seller, BNWT, returns accepted. I was clearly overwhelmed with lust for a bit of olive leather (very much underrated but it’s a lovely alternative to black) with the dark metal detailing and didn’t take note of the size. Each x Other is a lovely French brand, suspect this will be somewhat cropped. Sheep leather also a bit rarer for jackets as it’s more expensive and has that ‘buttery’ quality.

Ganni Coat Size S £50.00, UK seller, New, returns not accepted. A bit of a bargain, for what is that lovely 50’s Dior inspired silhouette that you don’t see as much. I found more info on an old NAP page here - just click on full ‘view product details’ in the right hand corner for more modelling pics. It’s a 100% polyester crepe which is a bit of a bummer but this is one of those silhouettes that would need that or a very expensive construction and extortionately priced silk to look like that. Really tempted by it but it’ll need a good fit and I know my Ganni size isn’t an S. Oh, and lest not forget, the claret lining that tantalisingly reveals itself as you move. Seriously, watch the video on NAP, it’s so lovely in the back too

Bags

Proenza Schouler Carryall Handbag Military Green £150.00, UK seller, Used (in VG condition), returns not accepted. This is quite an old model (old logo) but it’s in a very good condition and PS is a quality bag brand. I love the colour, would pair well with other neutrals, particularly navy. Great large work bag, but alas, I do not need more bags and it may be a tad large on my frame. It’s a 10th of the price of the PS1 bag today which this bag can clearly be seen as its precursor and a more practical size at that.

*AMAZING Carven Vintage Leather Shoulder Bag Mock Croc £39.99, used, UK seller, returns not accepted. Bargain alert! Carven don’t play in the big leagues of handbags but they still cost quite a penny new. This one has a very 60s/70s vibe but I suspect it’s quite a bit more recent than that, 90s maybe? It still has an older logo inside but the dustbag is more recent. Too ladylike for me but it doesn’t stop me adoring it.

OFFERTA Borsa Pitone Helmer £97.21, Italian Seller, BNWT, returns not accepted. Hel-mer is a British brand but strangely enough I only ever know of its popularity in France. They’re quite spendy (this bag retails at £500), do note it is real snake skin, not imitation. Hence my hesitation but it would make for a good S/S bag. Seller also has it in another colour, even more snake-like black and white.

Blazers

Helmut Lang silk satin pink blush blazer size M US 6
£65.00, UK seller, used, returns not accepted. -Lovely colour for S/S, Helmut Lang blazers have an amazing fit and it’s 100% silk. Not my size.

IRO two-tone White Black Tuxedo Jacket 38 UK 10 - £98.00, NWT, UK seller, returns accepted. you’ll notice a theme, I’m on the lookout for a tuxedo jacket and IRO do those really well. Again not my size.

Helmut Lang Black Tuxedo Trouser Suit S £120.00, UK seller, Used but only worn twice, returns not accepted, offers accepted. HL and a tuxedo, but alas the measurements are too far out for me. Probably more in the region of a UK10.

Blazers Contd.

ISABEL MARANT GRANDE LIGNE ,VESTE "KIOS" ,NEUVE ,ETIQUETÉE ,T:34 £114.00, French Seller, New, Returns accepted. Too ladylike for me but these type of jackets are a signature IM piece. Seller has a few others as well. It appears I can’t help but discriminate against a bit of brown

Shoes

Chloe Lauren Ballerina dunkelblau Gr. 39, neuwertig £140.51, German Seller, Like New, Returns not Accepted, Open to offers. These are a real classic from Chloe with a sturdy low heel that doesn’t look clunky at all. The scalloped edge is a beautiful detail and navy is not a colour you come across that often anymore. I have to accept my feet have shrunk again and I’m more a 38-38.5 than a 38.5, sometimes 39 these days .

Clothing

IRO Chiffon Silk Black White Printed Trousers Pants Size 1 UK 8-10 £320 New £99, UK seller, New, returns accepted, open to offers. I love a pair of silk elasticated pants for summer, as do the Parisiennes.

pretty your DH is too good for this world, just swing by without him next time

Have you tried the babble app, ksb, it's quite good practice and helps with pronunciation, even though you look like a bit of an idiot screaming into your phone sometimes

I don't think I own any watches, Proper, there may be some evening ones in my Grandmother's jewellery collection (I still consider that hers, not mine) but I've never really gotten into wearing watches or earrings for that matter. I was never allowed to pierce them as a child and by the time I was of age I had no interest in them.

Wow, bo so much to look at, some of those coats are gorgeous (I just can't justify any big spends atm).

Proper Justine has a great video on earrings for your face shape. I do find earrings with a scarf can be tricky (I tend to wear long, if I wear earrings) as they can catch on your scarf. I would also recommend Etsy for earrings, loads of choice, but you have to know exactly what you are looking for.

I keep popping back to this lovely thread to vicariously shop through you all What does a chic French woman wear when she find someone herself in more rural environs? Is mud allowed? I tried looking for variations on a theme of French country style on Pinterest, but it just insists on showing me kitchens

I have fallen off the cheval lately due to having a cold-stricken toddler, a cold-stricken childminder, a slightly grumpy DH who Does Not Like broken nights and 24 documents to edit which have all arrived at once - any magical French makeup tips for under eye bags please...?

Are they just swollen, nothing else? Not really French but Korean, take two teabags (wet but not hot obviously) and rest them on your eyes to take down the swelling somewhat, albeit temporarily. They use green tea but I suppose it's worth trying with black if that's all you have as that has more caffeine in it but less of the anti inflammatory properties of green tea.

Makeup, I swear the most magical miraculous can't be without it concealer is the Sisley Phyto one in number 2 but I don't like reccing it too much as it's frighteningly expensive but in all fairness it's more product than most concealers. I use it daily and a year on I'm still not halfway through. If you get two colours from Kiko (one slightly peachy for darkness and one a bit lighter to layer on top for illuminating) in the Full Coverage version (very lightweight and not heavy) that does a pretty good job too.

Ooooh, I’ll try the teabag thing when (if!) DS has a nap (yesterday he refused point blank and I was trying to work with Postman Pat burbling away and DS trying to steal my glasses from my face). My eyes are just tired - up for hours then staring at a laptop until fairly late as, due to the aforementioned specs theft I had to carry on working after bedtime 🙄 They need some TLC!

Maybe I’ll leave looking up that concealer until I’ve totted up my latest invoice

Spudlet I'm not feeling very chic this week either, as dd2 has seen fit to share her fluey/cold bug. I have to say lancome waterproof mascara is great, as I haven't really bothered with makeup, but couldn't be bothered to remove mine and tge lancome has stayed for 2 days. I did put some Chanel No5 (the eau premiere version) on today, to try and feel more human. Disclaimer: lancome mascara and Chanel No5 are normal for me.

I hope you get some sleep, sleep deprivation is awful. I've heard that about teabags too, didn't realise it was Korean.

I think i would look 10 years younger without my black and hollow undereyes .I use kevyn Aucion stuff in a small pot when I can be arsed. It's bloody amazing stuff, a real multi tasker. Not cheap though, but the pot with last years as it's so highly pigmented. I'll check out the ones you recommended bo.

I really like that Ganni coat bo. Gorgeous shape. Ended now though. And yes it was a camisole that I was thinking of thank you.

Lovely things there, bo, but I'll have to window shop.

I was looking at the students on campus today. There were lots of really nice big scarfs (our students are not wealthy, so I'm guessing they're probably not wool, but still look good). Some worn open, some wound nonchalantly around.

Hair, too - the girls seem to have the knack of having messy hair that looks good. Mine is curly and when it is messy, it looks...messy.

I don't know if there are tricks handed down through the generations, or some kind of innate ability to do these things nonchalantly. You do have to care enough, obviously.

There are some exceptions, of course, but not all that many. I won't mention the Yeti boots I spotted (it snowed this morning in Provence).

Tell you what, 'Undone done' long hair really gets in the way. Mine is getting on my wick. Not enough to have it cut off but enough to have my fringe cut back in asap.

I really liked the long navy coat that Meghan M had on today. Not that interested in them usually but her outfit caught my eye so looked it up. Not French but Canadian so...almost Anyway it's £££ and sold out but that's the kind of thing I'm looking for. Maybe not as long but it did look good with long boots.

Sorry, pic www.mackage.com/elodie-select-your-size-color-to-pre-order/ELODIE.html?dwvar_ELODIE_color=COL540&cgid=women-wool-coats#start=1&cgid=women-wool-coats

That's a lovely coat, Enid.
Odd styling, though.
If you had the means to buy a coat at that price, would you not look a teensy bit cheerier than that model?