Please help me! what do you wear to a wedding?!

[josiedaisy]

Hello, I'm a long time lurker and in desperate need of help! Bizarre as it may sound I am 33 and have never been to a wedding (history of MH issues including extreme anxiety - I don't tend to get out much!), but now have one to attend next week and embarrassingly enough I just don't actually know what women wear to weddings! I know it will need to be a dress but don't really know what length/style/colour is appropriate (google seems to give lots of different answers) or whether i should wear some kind of hat/what kind of shoes etc. I've been trawling round the shops today and feel more confused than ever now - please advise me!

For a bit of background I'm a pear shaped size 12-14 - quite chubby around the stomach, thighs and upper arms so would like to cover all of those areas really. I'm 5'4 with dark hair, and generally dress in jeans/t-shirts/trainers most of the time. There is no dress code on the invite so I assume it's just "normal" wedding attire.

any suggestions will be very gratefully received

Is it quite a posh wedding? If not I wouldn't worry too much about a hat or anything, unless you find one you like.

Generally, I avoid white, cream and black for weddings. And also try to avoid the colour of the bridesmaids (normally the invite colour scheme gives some indication of this). Apart from that, any smart dress would be suitable. I know Wallis and Phase Eight do some nice wedding dresses (dresses for wearing to a wedding not actual wedding dresses!). And perhaps you could get a matching jacket to cover shoulders/arms.

Hope that helps!

Doesn't have to be a dress - a fabulous skirt or a dressy trouser suit can look great too. Shoes that you can stand around for hours in!

I personally don't like hats or fascinators

I've never worn a hat or fascinator to a wedding, if I don't wear something normally I'm likely to feel awkward and uncomfortable. I tend to dress pretty casually too, but have had success with vintage dresses for weddings.

If you're happier in trousers I'd second the suggestion of trying trouser suits or tailored trousers with a dressy top.

It's a good excuse for a 'pretty' dress.m.coast-stores.com/p/floral-jacquard-whistan-dress/1611890?locale=en
Don't go too short, or too reveling.

I agree Phase Eight or Coast are great for weddings. Agree with pp about colours. Try and find a colour that really suits you. Don't forget handbag (my day-to-day bag is too big and casual for a wedding).

Most guests don't wear hats to weddings any more unless they are close family or friends, certainly no expectation to wear one. Do you have anything at all in your wardrobe already that you really like that we you could accessorise or do you have to buy everything? If so, what's your budget?

I aim to go as simple as possible, e.g. navy dress in a lovely cut and would then have fab shoes and bag and make sure my hair and make-up were immaculate - that is my style though, doesn't have to be yours!!

I agree with others. Sadly hats don't appear very often at weddings anymore - well, not beyond the B&G's Mums. Some wear fascinators, but you'd probably be in the majority if you go bare-headed.

I agree with MuggleMummy in trying to avoid white (bridal) or black (mourning) and to try not to have loads of flesh on show (although you've already said you would prefer to cover arms and thighs so you weren't anyway

Is the wedding all inside (ceremony and Reception in a hotel) or is it a Church then outside for photos then off to another venue, or something else? - Makes a difference to the practicalities. Also, what time of year?

Wear something glam that makes you feel fabulous! What sort of colours suit you?

There's a lot of standing around and make sure you have a wrap or similar in case you end up in a freezing marquee

Having said that, it's also possible to end up trapped in an overheated venue so I wouldn't recommend long sleeves either. The Dec wedding with open fires everywhere remains one of the hottest days of my life.

Knee length dress, not jersey fabric, is what I usually wear. And no headwear, it doesn't suit me at all.