Help me sort my hair out. And myself!

[mrsnec]

Hi all.

I'm a 37 yr old sahm with 3 month old pfb and I haven't been to the hairdressers in two years. It's never been an enjoyable experience for me and there are lots of reasons for this the main one being financial.

Before I got pg I lost 4 stone. I'm still overweight but I'm happy with my size and don't want to diet any more. I only put on 20lb in pregnancy and have shifted that. I got some new clothes, decent jeans, nice dresses for going out etc but I still think I look rubbish. I look better when I was bigger and I think my hair is the problem. In my favourite picture of myself it's kind of Holly Willoughby /Tess Daly length and colour.

It's now to my waist and a good few shades darker. So, I know getting a good cut is a start but I don't know what to do about the colour.

I used to get highlights but don't have the money or the patience now really. The last time I got them it cost 110 e for a t section and took 6 hours just in my little village salon!

I wondered if an all over colour would be quicker but the hairdresser tends to talk people out of that and tell them to do it themselves telling them what shade no to buy based on what she thinks will suit but I was told by another hairdresser not to do that because I 'fried' my hair years ago doing that. Have home dyes got better? Can you recommend one?

I did see a picture of jerry hall recently with shorter hair and it's the colour mine is now. I like it but the shorter and darker I go the more I look like my mother! Besides I've always liked long hair and with looking after dd it is tied back most of the time.

I got some xmas money I'd like to spend on sorting myself out it's enough to get my hair done but not much else. What would you do?

I would get it cut back to the length you like. Then experiment with colour. Maybe start off with going one or two shades lighter than your natural colour. I have been using home dyes for the past 7 years since having my ds. I use Loreal Performance. Like you, I just didn't have the time, money nor inclination for expensive colouring jobs at my salon. Home dying means more regular but I find it so much easier. Well done on your weight loss. How did you do it? takes out pen and notepad ready to jot down your tips

Have you got a college nearby that does beauty and hairdressing courses? You can get stuff done very cheaply.
I use home dyes. Last time I did it, I went round up a friends and we did each other's. It looked much better than when I did it myself and we had a good laugh too.

6 hours is ridiculous!

I hate going to the hairdresser too, but it's worth it as the alternative as you know is feeling crap when you look in the mirror. I have shoulder length highlighted hair, it's such a faff and so expensive but I just know if I don't do it then I hate the way I look.

So give yourself a shake and get to a different hairdresser. If you get say a half head of bleach highlights woven with a high lift colour highlights too, then a cool toner put on top - it would be around the £100 mark anywhere decent but should only take up to 3 hours. Book it in advance and just crack on - see it like a necessary evil.

It really sounds like you have similar hair to me - when it's done it's all swishy and beautiful, but when it's not, it's just bleh. You wear it every day - it's worth the cost and faff.

That's great thanks I was going to ask about a brand recommendation too so I'll look out for that one. If I go to that length it's still going to be fairly long. I think about boob length, do you think I'd need 2 boxes or start with one? I only ever used one before when it was that long and it never looked patchy but I noticed some say two boxes past shoulder length. I don't think I'm worried about having to die it at home more often. I have had 2 summers being pregnant and very sick in and intend to be out a bit more this year so the sun will probably lift it.

Thanks re the weight loss! I used mfp and cut out bread,rice and pasta whenever I wanted to speed up the weight loss and didn't count excercise, not that I did much, but it triggered obsessive behaviour in me for a while so I stopped but I kept up the good habits with the portion control so I've managed to maintain because dieting makes me so miserable I don't want to have to do it again!

Thanks for the other replies.

I'm not in the UK. I also don't drive. I live in a remote village which just happens to have an English hairdresser. It's such a tough one it looks like no matter where I go it's 3 hours and 100 quid but it just seems so much now I have other things to spend my money on!

When I lived in the UK I did go to a college and got really bored and impatient too. There is one here but I don't speak the language. There are other English hairdressers too, there's 3 branches of Toni and Guy for example all an hour away on the bus.

It definitely is a nesscesary evil I think. I will talk to a friend today. She can either do it for me or keep me company in the hairdressers and help me find a quicker one!

Toni and Guy is a good bet - that's where I go sometimes they're slated on here but I think they're good if you want something as technically difficult, but basic in terms of describing it like highlights. They always manage a creamy ashy highlighted blonde that doesn't look brassy or stripey, for me.

Please be careful if you venture into the world of box dyes - I used to use them in my youth to go dark brown or dark red, but now I'm a blonde I always use the hairdresser. I tried last year to do my own and it was a disaster and I nearly had to cut all my hair off - it was a fluffy frizzy ball! The first box dye turned it ginger so I went for bleach, after doing lots of research online... disaster! Blonde is far too hard to do at home. But I do feel your pain.