How to untangle really knotted hair

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DD has a lot of hair and doesn't brush it properly or enough. She is currently weeping as DH tries to untangle it. We have tangle teaser brushes, leave in conditioner and I encourage her to wash it every 2-3 day and brush it through while damp.

I think her hair is thick and frizzy. What can I do to help her? She is refusing to have it cut after a traumatic appointment and the now left hairdresser said thinning her hair out wasn't an option or wouldn't help.

Maybe she will listen when we tell her to brush it more and let me plait it to sleep in but what can I do right now to help?

It has taken so long her hair has pretty much dried.

If she washes hair first, then puts on conditioner and leaves it while she washes her body etc, that may help. Also brushing the conditioner through her hair in the bath before rinsing.

But I agree with a pp, if she wants it long she has to brush it to the best of her abilities night and morning, and let you finish off and plait / tie it back without a fuss. Otherwise it needs to be cut short.