Fat, bad skin, limp hair, dreadful clothes. Just where do I start??

[Doingakatereddy]

I've had a truly awful year, one nightmare after another but I'm coming through it & was feeling positive - right until someone posted a picture of me on Facebook.

I'm 3 stone over weight, skin is red (sunburnt) oily with large pores, my hair is greying, frizzy and I just wear it scraped up. After my last pregnancy I really can't fit into any of my clothes & rotate 2 pairs jeans and maybe 4-5 tops.

I've tried SW but just overdose on pasta!

Any advice on where to start? I work well with a plan & will excercise if directed (I'm nt allowed to do vigorous aerobic stuff)

Thanks in advance as I read these threads with wonder at how much you guys know

Two easy things: skincare morning and night and finding an easy way to do your hair.

I find just being very diligent in cleansing and moisturising twice a day, in whatever form
, really does make a difference - and then once you've done that in the morning you might as well take two minutes to put a bit of make up on. Could you run straighteners or a Big hair through iur hair instead if putting it up? I never ever wear my hair tied back as I hate the way it looks aand makes me feel frumpy.

A trip to a salon for a good blow dry and getting your eyebrows done could be a nice start. Im cheeky too I pick my beauticians brains while Im getting treatments! They will be looking at your skin close up anyway and its something to chat about. And maybe take a stylish friend shopping? She can give you advice and you can have a nice day out. Have fun!

I feel your pain! I'm about three stone overweight too, although realistically two stone off would do!!!

Definitely agree that good skin care morning and night will help. Hand cream too and file your nails even if they are short. Kept them the same length and they will look smarter.

I don't know the answer I'm afraid, but I can sympathise. We've had a rubbish few months, DH was made redundant suddenly and our savings have gone, only still in our house thanks to the bank of mum and dad. The stress had seen me put on a stone and although I know I have to do something about it because I'm not happy I just can't be bothered as in the scheme of things it's just not important. I also have few clothes that fit, but thankfully we have a 99p charity shop near us and I pick up some real bargains in there.

I'm sure others on here will have more help for you, I just wanted to say hi and offer a virtual hug!!! Xx

Semi permanent hair colour and a good cut, light foundation (lily lolo mineral is really good), blush and mascara will make a big difference and if you have any money left you could buy new jeans/leggings and a couple of summery tops from primarni/h&m/supermarket to give you a lift.

Diet wise I am still looking for the answer myself and I like violent exercise but what about swimming, walking, Pilates, to improve your mood?

Right, let's go for some quick wins:

1 De-tag the photo, and change your settings to prevent people tagging you in future (it's really rude to post glam photos of yourself, and horrid ones of others)

2 Book a hair appointment to get your hair cut. Any short style will be more flattering than scraped back, especially as you get older

3 Buy some suncream, and remember to use it (on yourself, as well as the kids)

4 Buy a couple of new tops, in flattering colours/styles

5 Sign up to MyFitnessPal and start to record everything you eat at the moment. Changing your diet can come later

6 Go for a gentle walk and enjoy the spring weather

That's enough for now . . .

Thank you! Skin care routine is something I'm just awful at, same face wash I used at 16 and not sure my moisturiser has enough sunscreen stuff.

isitpimms thank you for the virtual hug , I hope things get better for you soon - sometimes it just all comes at once doesn't it. Good luck to you

Would low carb suit you better than low calorie?.

Hair; concentrate on protein enriched intensive conditioners & take a multivitamin tablet, poundshop ones are fine.

Skin; cleanse properly with a balm/non foaming type cleanser twice a day and use a warm flannel to remove it.

Wear a sunscreen on the face & neck daily. The only day I've not worn it in the past 15 years is my wedding day.

I like Caroline hirons blog on skin care fascinating, her advice works for me but, like everything else, what suits one person doesn't suit another.

Write a plan of daily tasks eg

Am

Cleanse face thoroughly, apply sunscreen & make up.
Comb hair, tip to root.

Pm

Cleanse face & neck thoroughly, apply serum, moisturiser and eye cream.
Put hand cream on with poundshop cotton gloves on top.

Something like that?

OP if I were you (I was, last year) I'd go and get blood tests for things like hypithyroidism (frizzy hair, weight gain, bad skin etc...feeling cold? Hair loss? ) anemia, vitamin D etc.

I think you need to make yourself feel better rather than worry about looking better. One follows the other.

Perhaps mindfulness? Or doing something meditative like yoga? And drinking lots of water / getting lots of sleep always helps me to feel better.

Doinga, the best thing to start with is exercise. It'll make you feel much more positive about yourself. You'll find healthy eating will follow, and your skin will get better. Do it for yourself. Look at the exercise threads on mn for ideas

What do you want to do? What do you think would Mage you feel good - eg I used to have lovely hair, so I always feel my best with great hair, but I'm more or less resigned to having rubbish skin. So in your situation I would do my hair first.

Be kind to yourself.

I had severe insulin resistance/gestational diabetes twice during pregnancy.
Both times I put on 6+ stone. And both times I lost it again
It was hard work I admit. Mostly because I struggled to find a way of eating which suited me.
I also suffer from rosacea which appeared during my first pregnancy.

I've managed to get my face calm again and its barely noticeable now.

I recommend trying 5:2 diet or Low carb for weight loss.
5:2 is easiest and so very manageable even if life is busy and hard.

The biggest things which helped my red face calm down was oil cleansing. I use rice bran oil or hazelnut oil. To try it out, just go for almond oil or jojoba as they suit most people.

It's made my skin soft and clear. And calm again.

If you need extra calming you could also try Dermalex for rosacea. Available in boots (usually near the psoriasis creams etc). It's excellent and calms and soothes.

I also use the oils I cleans with on my hair to prevent frizz. I apply literally only a drop or two to wet hair before drying. Keeps hair healthy looking and frizz free.

Yes to using My Fitness Pal to track calories.

And do buy a few cheap temporary items of clothing to help you feel smarter. Even if its just two tops and two pairs of trousers.

You don't have a massive amount of weight to lose. So its not all bad honestly.
Oil for hair and face and you'll see a difference in a couple of weeks.

And again be kind to yourself.

I would concentrate on the things that are bothering you the most first.eg unless my hair is ok I don't feel ok.
I would support self with positives like I will do this rather than I look bad.
Walk daily, protect skin, cleanse skin.
Get a couple of tops or scarves to boost you - saisnburys have a sale I think?
Take care- you can do it!