I have a belt to make me look snake hipped (ha ha),

[Flossam]

Now how the hell do I wear it to make me have the semblence of a slim person??

I dunno but when you find out out let me know

Have I got this principle completely wrong? SHould I be taking said belt back as a useless commodity?

Ah well. I will go out looking like a complete nonce thanks to you stylish silent lot!

at least we will know that it is you flossum

That is very true!