Aaargh! Please help me style my hair for wedding

[Selks]

Not my wedding, my sons
I'm 48 and am off to Malaysia in three weeks for my son's wedding.
I'm having anxious thoughts about what the heck to do with my hair to make it look presentable.
The wedding celebrations start early in the morning so I will have no time to get to a salon and will have to do my hair myself. Another factor is that it's boiling hot and humid out there which probably won't help matters.
Clothes wise I will be wearing a smart tunic top and white crepe trousers.

My hair is a medium layered bob, naturaly wavy / curlyish at the ends and comes to shoulder length, and looks (on a good day) a bit like <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?um=1&sa=N&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=643&tbm=isch&tbnid=QJJkM1MB4gCUoM:&imgrefurl=www.thehairstyler.com/hairstyles/casual/medium/wavy/yellow-strawberry-global-salon-sarasota-fl-usa-9072&docid=CiSGYUuutpZwfM&imgurl=hairstyles.thehairstyler.com/hairstyle_views/right_view_images/925/original/9072_Wavy-Medium.jpg&w=500&h=600&ei=pNGPUfvxDYKd0QWX24DYCg&zoom=1&ved=1t:3588,r:16,s:0,i:129&iact=rc&dur=1383&page=1&tbnh=177&tbnw=148&start=0&ndsp=27&tx=89&ty=120" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this or <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?um=1&sa=N&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=643&tbm=isch&tbnid=AjUhOGghxDKOHM:&imgrefurl=muhammadakash.blogspot.com/2012/07/medium-wavy-hairstyles.html&docid=TQG6AO_jGcgAKM&imgurl=2.bp.blogspot.com/-NISozY3uMys/UBgyb9G064I/AAAAAAAAAAk/Uuruv9mlzFg/s640/Medium%252BWavy%252BHairstyles-3.jpg&w=500&h=600&ei=pNGPUfvxDYKd0QWX24DYCg&zoom=1&ved=1t:3588,r:17,s:0,i:132&iact=rc&dur=810&page=1&tbnh=176&tbnw=147&start=0&ndsp=27&tx=51&ty=67" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this.
It is a dark honey blonde and will have some light highlights and trim before I go. It has a tendency to be flat on top and frizzy at the ends.

So I'd like some styling tips please!! And how can I get the style to stay in - my hair is fine and styles just fall out.

I'm taking a hairdryer, barrel brush and curling tongs. I've had a practice with these today and only managed to make it look half decent. I'm pants with styling and never usually bother.

I'd just like it to look 'groomed' for the day, a bit of volume and maybe some gentle waves / curls at the bottom kind of thing.

Sorry for the essay but - help!?!

Oh, and what sort of styling products / hairspray etc should I use?

Thanks!

At a guess the heat and humidity will do for any curls in 10 seconds flat. Would it the a chignon?

Ahem. Would it take a chignon?

I can't do up do's, they don't suit me at all. I'd prefer to do something with it down if possible.

Thanks though.

You could maybe get your hair done professionally the evening before, then wrap it in silk to protect it for the morning?

Is the bride having a hairdresser?

Ah, OK. Your idea does sound like it'd look lovely, it might be worth practcing with setting lotion then. But, TBH I can see any non-natural curl or volume withstanding the climate well. Frizz is likely too I fear.

Will you be there for a few days before the wedding its self? I'd want to road test the planned style if it was a risk and have a back up option too.

Hoping someone from that neck of the woods will be along with more helpful advice.

Singingsilver, she is, I assume. She'll be at a diffferent place prior to the wedding though - she'll be at home and we're staying in the same hotel where the wedding is taking place.

I would imagine that any style I have done the night before would get totally flattened overnight, though?

Mrs Lettuce, yes we're there a week before the wedding so plenty of time for me to practice in situ

I just had a thought - I wonder if the hotel were we are staying has a hairdresser? (off to google). Bit scared of someone doing my hair that might not speak English though and me not being able to communicate what I want and something disastrous happening!

You could work out what you want with a hairdresser here, then take photos of every angle to pass to the local hairdresser?

I do silk wrapping to preserve a blowdry sometimes, but no anything more adventurous probably wouldn't work!

Hmm had a look at the hotel website. No mention of a hairdresser. And I'm not sure there would be time before the wedding anyway.

I'm going to have to do it myself, so - styling tips please!!

What about a digital perm ( no idea how widely available this is - meant to be not like a scary perm) and or heated rollers. I found in the past that heated rollers are easier than tongs and the curl holds better.

Heated rollers are a possible... Dd has a set and will be coming. Thanks, will think about that.
Would love some suggestions on products that would help?

Product wise I'd use what you would normally use with the addition of sun/uv protection spray not sure about brands but have got it from boots before. If you're getting highlights just before you go ask hairdresser which shampoo conditioner to use as maybe a colour protect one as pool might make it go funny colour?
I'd used frizz ease or similar smoothing serum on ends only and used a heat protection spray before blow drying/curling
Good luck

Maybe ask the hairdresser to do a conditioning treatment not normally much but will get your hair in tip top condition beforehand or if you have a free house and half hour then get a thick conditioner something elvive mask put it on dry hair smoother it and then put a carrier bag over hair and leave for 30 mins.. I know it sounds bizarre but it really works I'm always getting hair coloured so I do it every couple months :)

Thanks Wishful, that's good advice, particularly on the conditioning.