I am sick of being fat and frumpy

[ReculverTowers]

can you help me change please :(

I lost 4 stone a couple of years ago but I have put a stone and half back on and just cannot motivate myself at all but I really need to do it. I feel old and fat before my time.

I am only 35 but I am so short of money all the time I hardly ever get my hair cut/spend time or money on myself. How do you do it all on a budget?

I feel like i am having some sort of mid life crisis. This morning I bought myself some ripped jeans as I guessed I am not really that old and can get away with it. Yet I look at other women my age and they seem so much younger and care free. Is this my punishment for having teenage children in mid 30s.

:(

Try the 5:2
Very easy to stick to

Hi Reculver, wow, losing 4 stone is an amazing achievement in the first place, and 1.5 stone can be shifted within a few weeks if you really want to do it! Snog has suggested the 5:2 diet ('normal' eating for five days and fasting for two) - I have a blog post about following this diet here if you're interested in reading a bit more about it.

Sorry you're feeling low-if your budget is tight, do you have a local college that teaches beauty therapy or hairdressing? They usually have a salon in the college that does hair and beauty stuff incredibly cheaply (my local one charges 50p for an eyebrow wax, about £4 for a manicure or pedicure and £4 for a cut and blow dry. They also do free courses of 6 back massages or facials, if you agree to be a case study and fill in a questionnaire at the end of the course) If you don't have a college nearby, keep an eye on hairdressers windows, as they often have a notice up looking for models for free haircuts (eg Model needed Monday at 4 o'clock) which could be a good way of getting your hair cut-it can really boost how you feel! Another great morale booster is getting a cheap, pretty nail varnish and painting your nails-mine make me smile whenever I see them.

I can't really help with the clothes side of things, but perhaps someone else can advise you on those?

Hope you feel happier soon-why not look at some threads called 'princessing' in the archives-they have some great, affordable ways of improving how you look and feel :)

You could cycle from reculver, to margate and back Tis a nice cycle and by jove you will know it if its a windy day :)

I can't imagine putting your body into a faux diabetic state can be healthy - fast for two days a week??? whatever next?? Or you could do what i did when i had a teenager at 35, i got pregnant again maybe not! lol

losing 1.5 stone in a couple of weeks is a surefire way to pile it back on again the minute you start eating properly again. The best diets are ones that don't deprive you of anything, just eat healthily and increase your exercise regieme, you'll feel so much better for it.

It's actually a very well regarded way of losing or controlling weight, LEM-lots of research into health benefits in addition to weight loss.

The Big/slim/whatever weightloss section of MN is home to a busy and very long running series of threads about 5:2, and they have some great links if you're interested in reading more of the science behind it. This looks like the current thread-the first post has a summary of how it works.

Just to be very clear, I didn't suggest that 1.5 stone could be lost in a couple of weeks-when I said a few, I had an average weight loss of about 2-3lb a week in mind, which is a healthy and achievable loss (the first week, as with most diets, generally sees a greater loss than that).

I will be your buddy. I've lost nearly four stone in the last year and a bit but I'm in a major plateau and need to lose about another 20 pounds. I'm 34.

We can do this. We could get that weight off in ooh 10 weeks I reckon? Shall we try?

And I'm on a tight budget too. I dye my hair myself. Cut at supacuts every three months (I am growing it and trim the fringe myself). Pound land do a rip off version of the John frieda brunette shampoo and conditioner - it's really good. Clothes mostly charity shops/sainsburys or clearance/sales online, but I don't buy much especially in the last year as I've dropped through quite a few sizes (I was an 18, now a 12-14 depending on the shop).

Keep your hair brushed, your eyebrows groomed and light well applied make up and it makes a massive difference. Also not too much alcohol and lots of beauty sleep!

I recommend The Shred

A fiver inc p+p from Amazon

20 mins a day. It works

You'll feel better physically and mentally

I tried the shred for a week recently. Plus a very healthy diet.

I gained 2lbs. I was not impressed.

chub I always gain weight when I re-start an exercise routine - It's because your muscles are sore and have retained water temporarily.

Good tip OP on offering yourself to be practiced on by the local beauty college. My colleague used to get her hair done there regularly - it was always fine.

I too rate the 5:2 eating plan. What can be cheaper than going without for 2 days a week ;)

Really? There's a science thing to it? Ok maybe I will give it another go.

Of course you should do the 5:2 WOL. You save lots of money, it's easy to do and there 's lots of support on here. Come and join us

The shreds £11 now, I reckon they put the price up towards summer, if you have unlimited broadband it's on youtube for free so I hear.

I recommend the shred too. I could see I had lost weight after just a week.

I dye my own hair too. And I've found a lovely local hairdresser who doesn't charge too much. I had my hair cut short after having it in a bod and it definitely makes my look more 'pulled together' as its in an actual style now.

I also had my ears pierced at age 38.

Go through the clothes and make up you have and start wearing what you've got.

Muscle weighs more than fat

That's the theory I'm working with anyway

You don't need to spend to lose weight

You can't turn fat into muscle.

I already have the shred, I did it a while ago and lost interest and arf! at cycling to Margate. I live way way over the bridge and tunnel now, it would take me a couple of days...

I have recently been approved for a swimming pass through a carers charity (I am a carer obv) which is amazing as I could never pay for one myself but I broke my coccyx a couple of months ago and I thought swimming would help me get fit again and my dd's social worker applied for a grant for me and they approved it, which is bloody amazing BUt i am yet to pick it up and I am already stressing about wearing a swimming costume. gah. Actually mentioning the coccyx, I think it is when I started putting weight back on and feeling unmotivated as I couldn't do any exercise for weeks and weeks and even now if I walk too far it can ache and I feel a bit unstable.

I will look at the 5:2, thank you :)

Re. the hairdresser, I will look at my local college, what a great idea. My eyebrows look AWFUL atm :( and my hair but it's nearly £50 a cut locally to me. We do have a super cuts in the next town that people queue up to get into. Are they okay then?

Thanks for all the advice

omg, thank you SO much. A quick google has found the local college does have a salon and it's only £10 for a wash, cut and blow dry, £4 for a eyebrow wax and shape
what a revelation! :o
oh i love you all

That's great, phone them now and get an appointment booked in! I also have the shred, and manage a day or so every now and then, then my legs hurt and I give up-this thread has inspired me to dust it off and give it another go!

The swimming pass sounds brilliant too, and I don't think anyone really feels super confident in a swimming costume-everyone is there to get a bit fitter, so try not to worry too much about how you look.

You sound much happier this morning, it's a gorgeous sunny day here, I hope you have lovely weather and a positive day :)

Hi. I am also 35 and felt exactly like you do now. I lost my post pregnancy weight quite quickly following the birth of my lo. But ended up putting back on over half a stone by pigging out and going for the easy but not so healthy option for lunch and tea. Ie biscuits, crisps, chocolate etc. I felt like I had let everything go as I stopped looking after myself. My hair was shit, my skin pale and tired looking, and so on.

Anyway I decided to start looking after myself and my spur on was my return to work. I didn't want colleagues thinking I had let myself go since having a baby. Plus I think also becoming a mum too I wanted to look good and start taking care of myself.

I downloaded my fitness app on my mobile and restricted myself to 1400 calories a day. And 15 Weeks later I was 22 pound later. I am now a size 8/10.

I have also started taking some evening primrose oil capsules and vitamin c tablets to help with my skin. I fake tan to give myself a bit of colour. I have my eyebrows waxed every three weeks. I am looking into a new hair cut too as I have had the same style for years (long and straight). I am also in the process of trying to sort a skin condition out with the help of my gp which I have had for years but fed up of just putting up with it.

Because I have lost weight though I need a whole new wardrobe but I am crap at buying clothes as I don't know what looks good on me. I always end up with Jeans!

But if I were you give yourself a goal. I found that making a list in my head of what I wanted to change spurred me on (weight, hair, skin, eyebrows, teeth). You can do it! You will feel so much better once you are happier with yourself. It does take time though. I started my diet just after Christmas and am at my goal 15 weeks later.

Sorry meant 22 pounds lighter!

Look at the Paul Mckenna Way of Eating: I've got to my target size 10 on it and I'm maintaining (you can get the booksetc. on Amazon) its the best because it changes your attitude to food and doesn' t involve fasting or calorie counting or humiliating meetings or (best of all) diet low fat shxx food!!!

I'm a size 8, I feel self conscious in swim wear. It's practically underwear fgs.

I have two bikinis I've never worn. I stick to a nice safe cossie. You know where you are in a cossie.

I also dye my hair myself and have a friend who is a really good hairdresser who cuts my hair for only 15 pound.

Can I just add that my fitness pal is the easiest and best way of losing weight I have ever tried and I have done a lot of diets over the years. I didn't do any exercise to help with my weight loss. I just did some toning up at home when I saw the weight coming off as my skin seemed to be sagging. I do 50 Push ups on a chair for my bingo wings, squats for 50 seconds to help with my flabby thighs, 50 seconds of the plank for my jelly belly and 50 sit ups. I try to do this daily ( only takes about ten mins) but most off the time its every other day as I forget.

you are all very good getting to a size 8-10. I am not sure that is acheivable for me though as I am 5 9 1/2 5 10. i am quite happy with a size 12-14 tbh! but atm I am in a tight 14 and a size 16 and it's bloody depressing.

yy re swimwear I contemplated buying one of those costumes in m&s with the skirt on but then decided I would just look silly