brighthair, I feel your pain! I have the same type of hair and have spent YEARS trying product after product with zero success. My current regime works for me and is wallet-friendly
:
Wash every 3 days with baby shampoo, cheapo stuff is fine. Really scrub your scalp with pads of fingers (not nails), don't work your whole head of hair into a great big lather or you'll never get the knots out. I only 'wash' the ends as I'm rinsing the foam out of the roots.
Condition with any cheapo conditioner but use TONS of it. I use about 3 handfuls each time. Work it through gently, scrunching as you go, then rinse out. I also do this in between shampoos if hair needs conditioning (most days!).
Then, SOAKING wet hair, do not towel dry - flip head over so hair is hanging upside down (not good for my dodgy back but hey-ho!). This allows you get good volume at roots and stops dried hair looking flat.
Leave-in conditioner - I use a normal conditioner for this, Elvive Colour Protect, plenty of it, a good fistful at least.
Curl creme - Boots pink stuff, just over £1 a tub. Bargain. Rub it between your palms before applying and it goes further.I find I don't need loads of this.
Gel - I have used a Garnier one which was just fine, but I'm currently using a product called 'Curl Queen' from the British Curlies website
By now your hair will be proper squelchy and jam-packed full of moisture, which is how we like it 
Wrap hair in towel and leave it for about 15 minutes, then take off towel, arrange curls how you want them and air dry. Try to avoid touching until mostly dry. Might be a little bit hard but scrunches out easily.
Bit of a faff but easy on wallet. I do recommend www.britishcurlies.co.uk - some great products but a bit £££££. Good luck!