Please help (although I am neither stylish nor beautiful)

[silver28]

I feel like a bit of a fraud coming on thus topic, as it usually seems full of stylish types swapping tips and I am no longer stylish at all. But I do need help (please).

I am going for a night out in Liverpool (meal, bars, prob a club (aaarrrggh)) in three weeks' time fir my best friend's birthday. I never go out on that sort if night nowadays and definitely need to but something new to wear.

The trouble is I an now horribly fat and have no idea what suits me (and/or what makes me look slimmer).

I am 5'9" and size 18 on top and a 20 on the bottom. I have a flabby tummy and awful legs. I hate the way I look (and am trying to sort that but not going to be significantly different in 3 weeks) and prefer not to wear anything that would draw attention to me too much.

I keep thinking that I'd like a maxi dress as it would cover my legs and I could combine it with control knickers to reign my tummy in. But the few I've tried on make me look fairly lumpy and/or pregnant. I'd like one that is a heavy enough fabric to hang nicely and is also good and long. I couldn't wear one that is to flimsy or halternecked as as I need to wear a decent bra (and also find that being too flimsy make my chest and arms look bigger).

Anyway, I'd be so grateful if anyone could suggest either a suitable maxi dress or something else that might look ok. I'm in the north west, although have time to buy online. I'd spend up to about £100 on an outfit, depending on whether I really liked it (or how desperate I got!).

Many thanks in advance, and sorry for the long rambling post!

Sorry for the typos

Rather than a maxi dress (which might not be great for a club) what about something like this?

or this?

Thanks. I do like those ( prefer the first) - I just fund with monsoon dresses that they tend to sit just above the knee, and I need something that falls just below the knee ( I have dreadful knees!). I could try them on though, just to check.

I know maxi dress isn't great for a club but tbh we might not even go to a club, more likely to be a late bar with music type place.

I'm 31 and the rest of the people going are around 40 btw (thank God i'm not going out with a bunch of teenagers!).

what about a nice long line tunic with some wide leg trousers underneath? always looks like a good clean sillhouette when i see people wearing that kind of thing?

wear dark colours and get something really big and bold jewellery wise to keep attention on your face...

That's prob what I'll end up with. I suppose trousers are a practical option as I can wear them for work too. It's just depressing as it's such a 'fat person' outfit (I know tunics can be cool but IMO only if teamed with skinny jeans). But then I am fat so need a fat person outfit, better than trying to squeeze myself into something that doesn't flatter!!

I think a tunic and wide legged trousers sounds good. Make sure you have good fitting underwear on, are you able to wear a heel or wedge, really think they make you walk tall and appear a bit slimmer, nothing too high though you need to feel steady.

Spend more time on your hair and makeup....i'm not happy with my weight but feel a bit better about myself if my hair and makeup are just right.

Just thought do you have a pair of jeans you love? perhaps just get a new top and wear with heels, i agree you need to draw attention upwards.

I think I need to buy new trousers or poss dark jeans. I don't have any that I like. I've been wearing wide linen trousers all summer. Need some long enough to wear with heels. I think wedges might be a good choice (I used to wear heels all the time bur wear flats, uggs or birkenstoks 99% of the time now, and my feet have got used to it!).

dont dress like a granny

get a nice pair of trousers and a 'tit' top

make it sparkley

embrace yourself.

i don't think its a fat outfit at all....

i wear that sort of look all the time, and i'm not fat (can only say that because you can't see me!! i am nicely rounded shall we say!)

if you feel you want something a bit more cool, how about some bootcuit jeans which are sort of fitted around the thingh and then go flarey, with the same long top over?

agree, good undies make all the difference!

how old are you?

do you do showing a cleavage?

do you prefer sort of hippy/boho style, or rock chick sort of style?

just had a quick mooch on evans website..lots of nice tops on there.....

I'm 31. Happy to show cleavage (need to in fact, higher necks make me look bigger). Will search on monsoon and Evans websites for suitable tops.

Re style, not keen on boho or frilly things, prefer simple styles. Can't really think now what I do like, easier to say what i don't like, which I know is not v helpful.

Thanks all for helpful suggestions.

this looks nice and plain...is fitted under the boobs, and gives a good shape...in fact, the whole website looks good imo...you can see what the clothes look like on a real body, and how different the clothes shapes can make you look...

If you have a good pair of pins

www.phase-eight.co.uk/fcp/product/warehouse/Dresses/Starburst-Jersey-Dress/201084153

Phase eight is quite good dress wise for balancing out boobs and bums.

I never see anything in shops though- only online

Love that phase eight dress though I have horrid kegs so fear it will be too short.

Am going to look on that website you've linked to tonight chimchar

Legs not kegs ( though they are fairly keg shaped!)

Definitely get a blow dry at least.....don't know anyone who doesn't feel fab after that

(except my skin head mates )

Thanks for all the advice. Am a bit limited re what I can do re hair etc as we're not from Liverpool, just going over there for the evening and stopping over in an apartment. Can't get my hair done there and won't have an opportunity before we go, however it will be nice to get ready there and do my nails etc with plenty of time and without 2 yo DS clinging to my kegs and trying to grab my hair dryer!

Also am getting my hair cut and hilighted the week before (as we're going on holiday for a few days in the week before) so it should look alright.

Kegs again!

i think the top chimchar linked to is ideal, with your boobs pushed up like that no one will be looking at the rest of you, wear with dark bootcut jeans and the highest heels you feel safe in. This is the kinda outfit i would feel good in. The phase 8 dress is lovely but out of my comfort zone and also alot of money, you will get more wear out of jeans and a top. Sparkly clutch bag too, try and get an oversized one, nothing worse than a tiny bag on a bigger lady, think heather from eastenders.

I read today about bright red lippy being in and red heels....i've always wanted a pair of red shoes since i was a child.....

Do come back and let us know what you end up getting.