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Original poster

Ex in our house! Fuming.

47 replies

NoMoreKey · 09/06/2022 18:06

My early teen DSC left his phone at ours by mistake the other day.

Ive just found out that his ex rang DH to see about getting it back and he thought it was totally fine and a good idea to tell her she could get his key from him and go and get it from our house!!

To clarify DH works close to where we live and also where their mum lives and DSC was at school.

They don't even get on, DH and ex, she's absolutely horrid to both him and me. I don't know what's possessed him.

I've told him if he ever does that again I'll be so mad. The thought of the woman snooping round my house makes me feel ill (she honestly is awful and is the biggest pita and source of stress in our lives).

OP posts:
Moosake · 09/06/2022 20:38

@Rodneytrotterslovechild That's why I suggested OP change the locks. I know it might seem a bit of an over reaction to some but clearly you and I know different! Sorry you had to go through all that.

LorW · 09/06/2022 20:38

Rodneytrotterslovechild · 09/06/2022 20:16

We had the same thing happen to us

dp married a real bitch-when they broke up,she refused to allow him to see the kids,the bile we’ve taken has to be seen to be believed,she contacted every single person I’m related to (snooped on my fb and googled my unusual surname on Google) and sent hateful messages and she’s caused so much trouble for us-no matter how tiny anything is,if she find out about it,we take months of her bile etc

anyway to cut a long story short,she threw the eldest out and she ended up living with us

apple didn’t fall far from that tree and she soon moved out-taking our house keys with her-back to her mother

i told dp to either get the keys back or change the locks-I ended up getting the keys back from her (took weeks of ranting phone calls from the pair of them over that) and didn’t think much of it-as far as I was concerned I’d got them back and that was the end of it

until a few weeks later,I had an unexpected day off work so was having a rare lie in

i heard keys in the lock and got up thinking it was my dp

nope-mrs ex wife had got our keys cut and kept the copy for herself-and had come round and let herself in for reasons only known to herself

i threw her out and we had new locks fitted within the day-of course we are in the wrong for doing this

i would be fuming-if your husband was single then he can do what he likes but it’s your home too and she had no right getting keys to let herself in to grab the phone-she will have had a snoop-her type can’t resist

teens do forget stuff-the lesson is the wait to get it back-I’ve had it with my lot

Oh my goodness! I’d of gone absolutely nuts! How does one even keep their cool in that situation 😱

Rodneytrotterslovechild · 09/06/2022 20:51

LorW · 09/06/2022 20:38

Oh my goodness! I’d of gone absolutely nuts! How does one even keep their cool in that situation 😱

Show quote history

I didn’t-I lost it

she threatened to phone the police on me!

(I can see how that would have gone-‘well hello mr policeman,she’s going mental because I stole her keys,had a copy cut and have just let myself into her house for a snoop to see what I could find and she’s not happy about it’)

I managed to get her out and as far as I’m aware,she still has a copy of the key,which is now useless as we had the locks changed-I do think she’s tried again as we suddenly got a string of foul messages and phone calls about 4/5 days later

bloody nutter

she goes mental if we are spotted within a mile of her house (she lives about 5/6 miles away and if I want to go near but not to her house I bloody well will) but is happy to let herself into ours on a whim

LadyCluck · 09/06/2022 21:49

I wouldn’t have been impressed either OP. I wouldn’t want his ex in our house as she too is a huge PITA. It’s one of a couple of reasons that neither of the SC have a door key.

harryclr · 10/06/2022 00:14

SamphirethePogoingStickerist · 09/06/2022 18:16

He was thinking about his son, putting the child first! The normal thing that parents do.

Lol the most ridiculous comment

Aquamarine1029 · 10/06/2022 00:18

I would be livid, and I would definitely change the locks. WTAF was your idiot husband thinking?

Babyghirl · 10/06/2022 07:14

@NoMoreKey
I would be fuming, I do not want my dp ex in my house at anytime she has no need or right to be here lol, have you told your dp you want locks changed just incase and it has not to happen again.

Moosake · 10/06/2022 07:25

Rodneytrotterslovechild · 09/06/2022 20:51

I didn’t-I lost it

she threatened to phone the police on me!

(I can see how that would have gone-‘well hello mr policeman,she’s going mental because I stole her keys,had a copy cut and have just let myself into her house for a snoop to see what I could find and she’s not happy about it’)

I managed to get her out and as far as I’m aware,she still has a copy of the key,which is now useless as we had the locks changed-I do think she’s tried again as we suddenly got a string of foul messages and phone calls about 4/5 days later

bloody nutter

she goes mental if we are spotted within a mile of her house (she lives about 5/6 miles away and if I want to go near but not to her house I bloody well will) but is happy to let herself into ours on a whim

Show quote history

I would consider seeing if you can get a restraining order. She sounds dangerous.

MeridianB · 10/06/2022 09:03

Ignore the baiter, OP. I’d be furious too.

Does your DH understand why this was important and why he won’t do it ever again?

SamphirethePogoingStickerist · 10/06/2022 09:23

Wow! I am baiting because I think that OPs reaction only harms herself?

That's utter madness.

CornishGem1975 · 10/06/2022 11:37

I too would be properly pissed off. It would never happen here as his ex refuses to come within about a mile of our house but even so if it did, I'd be furious.

pitchforksandflamethrowers · 10/06/2022 19:14

Yes no this isn't ok.

A phone being wanted right this second doesn't constitute putting the kids first and your entitled in your own home to have privacy from the ex wife snooping.

HumptyDumpty2022 · 11/06/2022 12:21

This is not ok, not at all.
YANBU.
The ex has zero reason to be in your home and the child could wait for his phone.

lickenchugget · 11/06/2022 12:56

I would change the locks personally, but then DH’s ex is insane. There’s no chance she wouldn’t have had a rifle
about.

Starseeking · 11/06/2022 13:43

Your DH should have made them wait until he was home to return the phone. If his DC was at school, this was not an emergency whereby he should let his EX into your home unsupervised. It's an invasion of your privacy, as you don't know what else she did while there.

harriethoyle · 12/06/2022 13:15

This is totally unacceptable - I am another one voting for changing the locks OP. I would be FURIOUS if my DH did this.

TheThreadisMildlyAmusing · 12/06/2022 13:46

Your DP was an idiot to let his ex in your joint home and I would have been furious too.

Your DSS should have come to collect his phone, if he keeps leaving it at your home, the only way he is going to learn to take responsibility for it is if he is the one inconvenienced in getting it back.

ThuMuClu · 12/06/2022 18:59

There is putting the children first and then there is this, which is absolutely ridiculous and unacceptable.

ThuMuClu · 12/06/2022 18:59

And how does it help the OP to pretend it’s fine and that she’s not livid?! Which she has a right to be!!

justamushypea · 13/06/2022 14:22

What a terrible invasion of your privacy. I'd be furious at anyone letting themself into my house, let alone the ex wife. I'd feel violated.
Change the locks and if he does it again change your husband too 😂

AubadeIsIt · 14/06/2022 22:22

Even if this Could be ok (it's not), DH should have Asked you beforehand if you minded.

roarfeckingroarr · 25/06/2022 16:05

What's the big deal?

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