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Step-parenting

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Original poster

Used smellies for Christmas present from DSC - would you be annoyed?

15 replies

clottedcream · 27/12/2011 22:55

last year I got nothing, which they thought was funny this year they got me a jar of smellies which was 3 quarters full, no tags so quite obvious some they had lying around and just wrapped up.

Ive bit my tongue and mentioned it to DH but fell on deaf ears

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

yellowraincoat · 27/12/2011 22:57

How old are they?

A couple of years ago, my partner's dad gave him a plastic bag full of half empty bottles of shampoo.

abbierhodes · 27/12/2011 23:00

Do you get on with them usually? How old are they? How on earth have they turned out to be the sort of children who would find it funny to be so rude? Why hasn't your DH taught them better? Why would you be with a man who produces kids like that?
I'm astounded by some people tbh. You'd be better of getting shot of the whole damn lot of them.

fusspot66 · 27/12/2011 23:05

If DSCs are too young to have enough of their own money to buy you a present, then it's your DH who has let you down I'm afraid. It's not nice though. I got smellies this year from DSCs, bought by themselves, but it's taken 7 years and to be age 21 for that!

Bohica · 27/12/2011 23:05

How old are they?

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 28/12/2011 09:14

I'm a nanny and my 6 and 3yr old charges wrapped up a half empty bootttle of their mums perfume for me as I'd said I liked it, so if they are litttle then it could be that they wanted to give you something, if they are older then it is just plain rude and your DH needs to have a word with them about being disrespectful.

My DP didn't get a present from his children so not much chance of me getting one

2gorgeousboys · 28/12/2011 10:55

DH got a present from my 16yr old DSS but only because I bought and wrapped it and presented him with it Boxing Day to give to his Dad.

DS1, DS2 and I did not get anything including a Christmas card from DSS (and he has plenty of his own money).

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 28/12/2011 11:09

last year I brought my DP a present from my DSC and his ex flipped and accused me of taking over as it was her job to buy something from them so this year i stayed out of it and he got nothing, damned if I do and damned if I dont

therantingBOM · 28/12/2011 11:22

I second what others have said about if they are small. I cringed at my DD wrapping up some old felt tips to give to her step mother but she's only 5 so to her she was giving gift and that is the main thing. (I also got her a nice Step-mother card and some chocolates for DD to give to her)

My DSD got me a gift that was really unsuitable and I blame her over DH or her Mother as she is a teenager and should know better.

I usualy get it out in the open early on that I will get a present for my ex from DD and a small gift for her step mother. They are presents form DD but also a little from me to say thanks for all they do all year round. If they want to buy things too for each other from DD then that's fine, I wouldn't be doing with any of this "it's my job" shit.

As STGT said, youre damned if you do asnd youre damned if you dont! So I try to be kind and do as i please. I'd rather be slagged off for being too kind

OffDownTheGardenToEatWorms · 28/12/2011 13:37

Yes, it really depends on how old as to how annoyed I would be.

I got nothing again this year, thirteen years in a row now . I actually thought this year might be the first on account of the numerous phone calls from them asking advice and opinions on their gift to their Dad. But no, it doesn't seem to occur to them that it's hurtful let alone rude.

balia · 28/12/2011 21:11

Think I'd be annoyed although I'm not sure who with...my DH made sure I had a present under the tree from both our boys, DS (4) and DSS (9). And I used to buy (and in later years make sure DD had bought) a small gift for her Stepmum. Somebody has no manners or consideration...just make sure you work out who it is and who is responsible for it before you get upset. and if it is the DSC's regift it back next year

Original poster

clottedcream · 29/12/2011 14:39

17 and 15. They have pocket money from DH and have enough to buy a small box of chocolates or decent present of some kind....

DH now says "Well thats what teenagers do"

OP posts:

chelen · 29/12/2011 15:13

Your DH is allowing his children to be very rude. That is really disgraceful IMO. They don't have to buy you a present if they are angry or don't like you but they should not be deliberately rude. My SS last year did not want to get me a mother's day pressie (he always used to), which is of course fine, but he would have been rollocked for giving a nasty present.

I would be telling your 'D'H that if he allows such rudeness you can't do anything for him or his children.

Tell your DH it is what very rude teenagers do. I am cross on your behalf!

Figgyrollsintoapudding · 29/12/2011 15:20

They should know better. Am sorry for you, it is just rude, would expect your dh to give them a bollocking!

candytuft63 · 29/12/2011 15:42

Its just so rude. My DSS turned up on xmas eve with a bag of presents and I gave him the bag of gifts which DH paid for but I trolled around the shops to get. On xmas morning - nothing for me, although TBH I didnt expect owt (cos the DSS Is horrid to me and always has been.) DH went ballistic, phoned up to tell him what a vile twat he was etc, how badly he has always treated me etc. He then opened the v.expensive whisky he got and chocs to share with me. Good old DH.
Hit yours round the head with the crap insults of presents you got.
Its not really about presents, is it ? They knew what they were doing to hurt you.

Sariah · 29/12/2011 19:00

My sds get me something thoughtful every year and my ds gets dh something also. I often tell the older girl that I would be happy with a nights free babysitting or a voucher for some cleaning if she is short on funds and has others to buy for like her own mother and younger siblings. This year she got me a lovely top and ds got dh 15 pairs of socks which is just what he wanted. I bought something small for the two little ones to give to dh and he did the same.

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