I live on the wirral and have a son with speech and language difficulties

[ChrisN]

Hi.
I live on the wirral and I have two sons, one is 3 and a half and my youngest is 20 months old.

My eldest son didnt say his first word until he was two, he is under speech therapy, paediatrician and Portage. The paediatrician is investigating possible autism. My son is still in nappies. I am looking for other mums who have children on the wirral, to meet up with and get to know. I feel quite isolated.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Christine x

Hi Chris, my DS is 6, he had severe language delay at 3, is much improved now but still is a bit behind. I live in South Liverpool, so pretty nearby. We also went down the ASD assessment route (conclusion was probably not ), so not a definite no, tbh I half expect a DX in next few years....

Sorry if I sound dumb but what does DS mean? Whats DX? What age did your son come out of nappies? My son isnt interested at all
do you have portage? x

Hi Chris - DS - is dear son, a common forum abbreviation. DX is diagnosis. We were never offered portage. DS came out of nappies gradually, he started toilet training at 3.5, and probably took about 6 months. I don't drive so had to keep him in nappies whilst on public transport until he was reliable, so might have been able to do it slightly quicker. He was never interested in the potty, he started copying what I was doing on the toilet.

Might be worth your while getting in touch with local branch of the National Autistic Society, to find parents of kids a similar age/position. Not sure what there is on the Wirral, there is a group called Parent Interest Group in Liverpool which is a support group for parents of kids with autism. I only went once, as I felt a bit funny about going after he didn't get a diagnosis, but they seemed nice people.

I have had a family support worker visit me from National Autistic society, wirral, he told me about a stay and play session in Bromborough childrens centre, I went but no-one spoke to me.

The paediatrician went to assess my son in preschool a few weeks ago, waiting for feedback from that, we only see her every six months. Speech therapy is few and far between too, can never get an appointment, looking into private speech therapy. My son has a very wide vocab but he can only put 4-5 words together. He has made progress since he was two though.

DS occasionally sits on the toilet, and I have been advised to try and train him through habit. What made you think your son was autistic? How long did he see a paed for? whats the speech therapy like in liverpool? Thanks for replying to me.
xxx

Chris - can you e-mail me - milkfloatquack at hotmail dot com. (as going into details re:speech therapy etc could make me too easy to identify). experience of NHS speech therapy - has been mixed, shall we say. found it difficult to get the initial referral. paediatrician only saw him once, at a joint clinic with an educational psychologist and senior salt, for about 1.5 hours. Had a v. positive experience of private speech therapy.

I was concerned about autism because at 3 his language and understanding of language were very delayed, he had lots of single words but that was about it. He was very withdrawn (so socially delayed) and lots of echolalia - so repeating what people said, and lengthy scripts from his favourite TV programs. He was (still is tbh) a very fussy eater. His sleep was awful at 3 (regular 2 am bedtims, having to coslee) significantly better now, but still not ideal. He was very behind in pretend play too, his play was quite limited and repetitive.

Ok,will email you. x

Also try the special needs toy library in Tranmere. You may have to get a referral (Health visitor, Paed ect ) to be able to attend, its really good

they tell you which day you go on and you will be with other parents with children with similar problems

Think you have to be brave and plonk yourself in the middle of some parents and just join in

When I used to go, depending on how many were there, the parents mostly stayed in the coffee lounge and the children got taken into the Nursery area with the staff and volunteers, was great

Thanks,I was told about that but because my son already goes to two settings: nursery and preschool, and he has one-to-one there, they said it would only confuse/complicate things. I went in to have a look and it looked great. I go to playgroup with both my sons and did a parenting course at childrens centre but everyone is older than me! x

Hi Chris

My son didn't get out of nappies in the day until he was over 4 years. He still has them at night and can be lazy now at almost 6. He also only put 4 words together at 4 in a sentence but a big improvement on when he was 3 when he didn't put 2 words together. Now he will talk fluently about whatever interests him although having a conversation with him is difficult/impossible. On the plus side he is very bright and he learned to read very early and he has a lovely singing voice. One way to meet other parents would be to invite their children on a play date. So what if the parents are a bit older they will still have the same sort of concerns you have about your child, give it a go. Good Luck x

Ok,how do I go about that, inviting their children on a play date? People off here?

Did you find it all hard to manage?

Did your son start school in nappies? My son has another 18 months till he starts, but he goes to preschool in them, he has one-to-one there.

can I be nosy and ask how old you are Chris. I couldn't give a f*ck btw, and have had mum friends in their late teens/early twenties, and like to think I'm a not totally ancient 33 LOL.

playdates - I found it v. hard to make new "mummy" friends once DS's problems became apparent - I think it was a 50/50 thing though as to whether it was because I was stressed out my skull rather than people being unfriendly deliberately iyswim. I did carry on seeing friends I had already made with kids a similar age. I have met some nice mums both on here and on www.badmothersclub.co.uk. some with kids with special needs/autism, some with kids with no issues.

re:toy library. If your lad is not too bothered by new situations, then give the toy library a try, as much for your sake - the more chances you get to speak to people in a similar position and the children's centre staff the less alone you will feel - the pre-school special needs world can leave you feeling very alone IME.

is the stay and play sessions you went to specifically for kids with SN, out of interest?

I am 30 this year. Yeah I wanted Samuel to go to toy library but the speech therapist there advised against it and said because he is already going to two settings (nursery and preschool) that it would complicate things. They told me that sessions have to be prebookable and that its not a 'drop-in' centre.So that door is closed to me at the moment.

I went to wirral autistic society stay and play and people all already knew each other.

Hi

I would just ask when talking to one of the parents while taking him in or collecting him from pre-school or nursery if they'd like to meet up for a coffee or goto a play area with you? They can only say no. At the autistic society I would go and sit with the others, say Hi ect.

My son was scared of the toilet for a long time. His dad started taking him instead of me which seemed to help. He stopped using nappies in the day just a month after starting school but still has "accidents" when he gets home.

hi live on wirral. feel like ive been trapped at home since i moved here 2years ago due to my son's comunication and outburst problems. he is now 3years old he is now receiving speach therapy and is awaiting another appointment with specialist. There is supposesd to be a portage team involved but as yet i have heard nothing. my health visitior says to take him to parent and toddler but i am terrified of him going into melt down because people tend to look as if im a bad parent or he is spoilt. this is not the case., i have a teenage daughter who is as far from the stereo type of a teenager as you can get.so i know its not me. i dont want to have to constantly explain to people that he has special needs but on the other hand I need to get out and about with him. the fact that he is showing no interest in getting out of the nappys is another problem!!! can anyone help. please

wotsleep, can you not go to the Toy Library? they have children going with so many disabilities. At least if he has a meltdown everyone knows he has special needs, you will be able to vhat to other similar parents and get advice

If you feel it is too long that you have had to wait to hear from Portage, make a phone call and ask where things are up to

Also wotsleep, start a new post as you will get more people answering as this is an older one

Hi my son is almost 3 and had issues with glue ear so had grommits fitted and had adenoids and tonsils out as was always ill in the same operation in January. His personality is really coming out now and he is due to start speech therapy September , in the meantime he is progressing slowly himself since his operation in January 2016. I am moving from Middlesex to Wallasey in the next 2 months and worried as I am not sure where to start in regards to play groups/nursery schools as he was quote isolated due to hearing issues previously so I want him to mix with other children more. He is not 3 until October so will miss the September intake. Also where do I begin in regards to getting speech therapy for him and other courses my children centre had set up here for him. He is also very slow in potty training but I do not think he is autistic but he does walk on his toes quite a lot too now and then so I am really not sure?.

This is a very old thread.