I think I have discussed this before but I thought I'd just add something and finally get this off my chest.
When I went for ds1 3 yr check (I requested it as not routine anymore) I was informed that he was totally within normal range for his age.
she then proceeded to tell me that he was very like her son, he was probably just an annoying and irritating little boy - some are!!!! and that her son didn't do well in school, he's just about got a few GCSEs now but always got in with the wrong crowd. this info left me speechless (which I now regret I was too slow on the uptake to defend my son
Having been referred to the CHB he has now been dx as autistic.
I was rather when I went to see her (under duress) yesturday with ds3 and I voiced my concerns about him. She told me it was far too early to tell anything and just becasue he hand flaps, is distant at times and doesn't communicate (i know he's only 10m) this doesn't mean anything but having had 3 I obviously compare them all! ds2 is NT.
BTW, when my dh saw the paed recently he told me the statistic of siblings of asd have a 1 in 10 chance and he referred him immediatley saying the earlier the better to be assessed.
Anway, the thing which made me most cross is in the convo yesturday - it came out that her son is also autistic so why the F* did she tell me that my son definately wasn't and was just annoying and irritating.
Thats better - I can move on now - just wanted to say, its really affected the way I approach her and you should be able to go to your HV for advice but I avoid her at all costs.