Aspergic 4.3y - problems with eating with others.

[misscutandstick]

DS4 is 4.3 and only very recently (say the last month or so) i have noticed that very often if we go to McD's hes goes extremely pale and looks like hes going to throw.

At first i thought it was drinking his milkshake too quick, or eating to quick, or even the feel of the food???

However, often his drink isnt drunk, his food not touched, or even removed from its packet. so its not that.

When in meadowhall, he normally wants to sit on the stools/breakfast bar type raised tables (which face no-one except the big TV). At home he either sits in the kitchen at the breakfast bar (watching Iplayer) or up in his room with a DVD. All these things (I think) are to avoid watching people eat. I think it really turns his stomach. He hasnt eaten WITH the family in months and months. we accept that, he eats better when hes not in the same room, and so what? it doesnt bother me where he wants to eat, so long as he does.

However...

My mother seems insistant that eating is a 'social' event and must be complied with, "make him eat with you", or "ok then dont make him, but encourage him". She seems to think its like really important - for his future to be able to eat with people. I dont have these same priorities. I really thought she 'got' DS4.

so

1)How many children with SN struggle prefer to eat on their own? mine cant be the only one.

2. Just exactly how important is it???

3. Should i try and persuade him to comply, or persuade my mother that this is just NOT that important?

PS he has always eaten better when hes in his car seat, or in his pram...

1. i think its a common problem with SN children, dd1 eats less when people are around and often eats on her own in the kitchen. I also like to eat on my own and i hate eating out unless its just dh and me on our own.

2. If its not important to you then i wouldn't force him to eat in public (if we go to McDonalds we eat in the car).

3. I wouldn't force him, don't listen to your mother, you know whats best for your child.

I am always relaxed with the dd's eating habits, Dd1 eats where she wants to eat, she will eat out (cafes etc..) but will eat very slowly and look pale like your DS, Dd2 finds it hard to sit still at home but when out will sit to a table but is very messy with her food.