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A very bad morning...DS lost it and so did i!!!

10 replies

mysonben · 14/09/2009 12:46

I feel so bad now, esdpecially as DS did so well yesterday afternoon at friends' bbq.

But this morning, i had a doctors' appointment at 10.30, and as DH has got the car today, we had to walk...

We had not got to the end of the road when DS started going into one because he realised we were not going to the park (although i had told him we were going to the doctors and i thought he'd understood...apparently not!).
To his credit he quickly settled and we started walking again.

The doctors' surgey is a brand new building a bit further up the road of where it used to be.
They have recently moved there and this was the first time DS went there.

When we walked past the old surgery, DS stopped walking and started yelling "this way!!!", he was frantic because the old building was all boarded up and i was tying to calm him down.

But that was that, he was refusing to walk on and was just crying so i yelled at him and put him in DD's pushchair and held dd with one arm to get going as we were now late.

Then when we got to the new building (which is much bigger tha the old one), He went off again and was bellowing out while we waited in the reception, still strapped up in buggy.
And i'm so glad that the buckles are very stiff and hard to undo.

He did calm down when the nurse put on the bubbles machine on for him.
Pheewww...

The whole trip was just awful.
It had been a while since DS had such strong reactions to something (last one was about 2 months ago when we changed the bathroom floor), and i alowed myself to forget what a handful he can become when something is upsetting him.

OP posts:
Marne · 14/09/2009 13:02

hugs

It sounds like you handled the situation well, i would have been a wreck by the time i got to the doctors , we have days like this too, dd2 hates going to the doctors or hospital (i have to bribe her in the door with crisps).

Marne · 14/09/2009 13:04

ment {hugs} didn't mean to post a link (oops)

Dd2 got in a strop when i picked her up from nursery because she got up from her chair to early and was told to sit back down, took me a while to calm her down.

mysonben · 14/09/2009 13:10

Thanks Marne,
I think i'm more cross with myself really for sort of "forgetting" that DS has real issues with new places.
He is not too bad with things that are totally new , the real trouble starts when the new is replacing something else he is used to, if that makes any sense?

OP posts:
Marne · 14/09/2009 13:15

My dd2 would have reacted the same, she's ok with change (in moderation), yesterday i had to take dd2 in my friends car, dd only ever goes in our car she she was very confused even though i told her we were going in the red car.

Barmymummy · 14/09/2009 14:22

Oh big hugs to you, don't beat yourself up, we have all been there and lost it at some point.

Its easier to help them and explain to them when we have no time restrictions but when we are late it makes us edgey and therefore them edgey too.

Go make yourself a cuppa and give DS a hug, he will have moved on now and forgotten it, x

mysonben · 14/09/2009 14:36

Just spoke to DH on the phone about DS's outbursts this morning and he found it funny Cheek of it!
He would not have been laughting if it had been him handling both DS and DD with the buggy!

OP posts:
mysonben · 14/09/2009 15:17

Grrrr...
My always unhelpful sister saw my facebbok comment about having a cheerful bad morning.
So she rang me up to ask what was wrong?
Nice of her, until she atarts putting it all down to my bad parenting!!!

According to her, i'm not firm enough with DS, i let him get away with too much, like with his eating habits which are bad, she tells me her DS (NT) now eats all his vegetables and meats, he loves trying new foods!!! Good for him then.
I should worry that DS doesn't eat veggies or very little meat or fruits! I should be cooking some fresh steam veggies for him and purree them for him so he can't pick them out of his plate.
Very well but DS will simply eat what he choose not what i want or because it's good for him.
Apparently a big part of DS'issues and behaviours are caused by a slack ,too soft approach and not enough consistency from me.

I swear that she is deliberately being obtuse and nasty, as if i don't feel bad enough when faced with DS' quirks and struggles.
She has to rub my nose in it all the time!

Sorry about that rant but that phone call made me boil!
And i'm annoyed for being such a wimp, i should tell her where to go and put the phone down, but i never do, i'm a fool.

OP posts:
sodit · 14/09/2009 15:41

sounds like your sister is smug not very sympathetic. congratulate her on having such a boring compliant son and dont let her bother you, you dealt with the situation well and just chalk it upto experience. i always have an emergency bribe in my handbag for those sort of moments. It used to be to get ds1 into a shop now its to stop shopping and go home

mysonben · 14/09/2009 15:58

Thank you your supportive replies ladies.

I have been on MN ranting about my unsympathetic sis so many times, and really the SN board isn't about annoying relatives!

I've had a cuppa now and have calmed down.
Let's hope the rest of the day unfolds nicely.

Sodit, i will have to remember to keep a small goodies bag for DS for when we go out places where he could get upset.
Great idea, maybe something familiar such as a couple of toys cars to wip out at the right time could have helped this morning.
But as usual my brain isn't working up to full speed and i don't think!
As DH says: the rule of the 6 P apply!
(Prior Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance!!!)

OP posts:
Barmymummy · 14/09/2009 16:47

LMAO at the 6 p's!!

Your sis simply has no idea and refuses to learn. There's not alot you can do about it except put it down to her ignorance. We all know its not your parenting and so does your DH so don't feel you have to justify yourself to anyone. Personally I think you are amazing for keeping your cool, I would have killed her by now

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