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SN children

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Original poster

Tell me about the first true lie your asd child said?

14 replies

mysonben · 04/07/2009 19:04

It seems like asd kids do not lie or learn that they can cover their tracks with a lie later than NT kids. Is this for real?

OP posts:

asdx2 · 04/07/2009 19:22

Jack is 14 and still can't tell a believeable lie.
His first lie was at 13 and he told me Drogba had been in school for PE. He had a spell of telling lots more unlikely stories but never realised that for a lie to work it has to be believeable and not told with a grin on your face.
He sees no need to cover his tracks tbh and I suspect that he thinks I know what he has done because he knows what he's done and he doesn't realise I would know any different.
Jack has moderate autism though so not sure if higher functioning children lie earlier or easier than Jack can.

bubblagirl · 04/07/2009 19:39

when i asked ds to tell daddy a dragon broke the toilet seat it was me and ds is normally so literal daddy said no it was mummy wasn't it i was looking and was thinking his going to grass me up no it wasn't he said it was a big dragon

dp kept on that it was me and ds stuck to the story it was the dragon i was so proud lol

macwoozy · 04/07/2009 19:40

My 9 yr old ds with HFA/AS doesn't yet lie, well not that I know of anyway!
I had a conversation with him the other day and gave him an example as to when it's a good idea to tell a little white lie, so I explained to him that if a large lady asked if she looked big in her dress, for example, it would be kinder to say that she looks very nice. He said 'but why say that when she must know you're lying because she must know she looks fat'!

macwoozy · 04/07/2009 19:45

Although my ds will lie when done in a jokey way, buy hasn't figured that telling a lie could actually benefit him at other times.

Seuss · 04/07/2009 20:24

My ds will quite often pretend to be sick to get sent home from school. It's usually if he has a bit of a sniffle and he will really play it, he used to be very good at convincing his headteacher and getting sent home and then being perfectly ok for the rest of the day - school have got better at sussing when he's faking now though!

Seuss · 04/07/2009 20:25

He's 9 btw but has been trying it on for some time now.

PeachyTheRiverParrettHarlot · 04/07/2009 20:31

DS1 always lied, far more than tells truthg tbh

But tehre are give aways- I can spot it a mile off LOL

DS3 however is more typical (not lying isn't a specific diagnostic criteria of asd, just a common symptom IYSWIM)- he hasnt lied yet in real terms: untruths yes, such as he says DS1 hit me if he wants to comew down at night but it's kind of a code- same as when he says 'I hot' for when he is thirsty

Goblinchild · 04/07/2009 20:41

G couldn't understand the idea of a lie for years.
When he was KS2, he'd sometimes say 'It wasn't me' but with no hope of being believed, it was more a case of hoping that the magic words would change the situation to a more favourable one.
Sometimes he wasn't lying, what he was saying came from a very specific and narrow viewpoint and he believed what he said was the truth. There was also the issue of perceptions, and how his often differed from the NT one.
Now he's a teen, he occasionally tries to pull a fast one, but his grin gives him away.
He used to practice trying to tell fibs to see if he could fool me. Practising to be like his peers.
He has also learnt the power of saying nothing if he's unsure, rather than tell a truth he knows may upset someone.Then he brings it home for me to interpret for him.
That's when he's firing on all cylinders of course.

sphil · 04/07/2009 20:53

Me: Have you done a poo?
DS2: No!

EVERY time!

Original poster

mysonben · 04/07/2009 21:11

Spill- gosh i had forgotten the poo thing! My ds would say "no" everytime i'd done one and i could smell it. And when i'd take his pants off and say "what's that then ?" he would have a shocked look on his face saying "how did that get there!"

I was wondering about the lie thing as my friend's little girl (NT) has the same age as ds and she lies fairly often when she knows trouble is brewing, but ds doesn't really usually when he does you can see on his face that he hasn't really understood the question.

OP posts:

Original poster

mysonben · 04/07/2009 21:13

ooops i meant to say everytime HE 'd done one ! Not "i" !!! He he he...

OP posts:

sphil · 04/07/2009 22:28

I knew what you meant.
I'm pretty sure DS2 knows he's done it - he just doesn't want me to change his nappy.

Macforme · 04/07/2009 23:46

My son is 12..and has never lied. he can't even manage a useful 'white'one!!

He told the head teacher she had grey hair (she told him his hair was curly so he told her hers was grey!)..

I was away for 4 days with my own class and asked him if he missed me.. 'no Mummy'

He has asd and mod learning diffs.. and no ability to lie at ALL!

bubblagirl · 05/07/2009 08:12

my ds does the no i haven't pooed either while walking off like john wayne

also if i say you have already had crisps he'll say no he hasn't but then a smile spreads on his face so he knows his lying he has done this several times with things

have you got my phone no then smirks i say yes you have he says i haven't runs off laughing to go play games on my phone

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