Struggling with ADHD mornings before medication kicks in, any practical help?

[ThisHonestPeachEagle]

I’m really struggling to cope with the mornings. My youngest 2 (8 and 10) both have ADHD. My 10 year old needs constant supervision to get through the morning routine which is exhausting and repetitive but my 8 year old is totally uncontrollable. Everything he does from wake up at 6.30ish to medication kicking in (we give it him at 8, kicks in properly 30 mins later) is horrible & exhausting: shouting and screaming at the top of his voice nonsensical words and sounds (today he was pretending to be a fire alarm), banging together things, refusal to get dressed, pants on his head, in and out of his siblings rooms while they increasingly lose their temper, cackling manic laughter etc. My husband and I try to stay calm but an hour later i’m flooded with adrenaline and stress and feel so angry at him - which I hate because I know we are making our home an angry, shouty place and I hate they will all look back at their childhood and remember the chaos. I’ve tried different things but all is it seems to escalate him. If I try to ignore, he gets louder and more in my face with it and I’m so conscious of my neighbours. If I try to calm him or walk him through stuff he does the opposite of what he is supposed to do whilst maintaining a barrage of sound right into my face. Threats to remove stuff cut though in time and can get his attention after repeated mentions but they are always things he wants in the future - eg time on a screen later after school or an upcoming event - so it’s a delayed consequence that he can’t really engage with in the moment.
The 2 with ADHD are also like magnets - they can’t keep away from each other but it’s continuously escalating each other and winding the other up. We try to keep them in separate rooms - one getting dressed, one doing teeth for example but they just seek the other out.
I dread the mornings and spend the first few hours every day just trying to get through it then calm myself in the 15 mins between him going to school and work starting. My husband is exhausted too and says it feels a bit like a never ending prison sentence with no end in sight - every morning like a repeat of the last.
Is there anything we can do to help the youngest in particular manage himself before medication other than standing guard over him every second of the morning then having a cry once he’s gone to school??

I count down some morning until medication time, also 8:00!
he bounces off the walls and also volume level is ridiculous.
it’s so exhausting and frustrating so I totally get how your feeling.
I have no real advise tbh but what I did to stop myself getting angry and annoyed at him was reminding myself he can’t help it and it helped me asking him to stop more calmly.
our morning routine is also down the minute. (He’s asd aswell)
would visuals of what needs done and what order help? They can check off when they’ve done it.
I introduced incentives aswell, so whilst there is consequences still the incentives helped for better behaviour.

not sure if this is any help

Thankyou sunshine. I’m sorry you are experiencing the same exhausting chaos of adhd mornings too but it helps knowing others are out there and understand!

Could you try taking medication earlier? Some take it as they wake up (literally before they even get out of bed) or have breakfast ASAP then take it. With a top up dose later in the day if necessary.

Would DC try some exercise or sensory activities not long after waking? Some find that helps.

Thankyou for your thought, much appreciated. I will try some exercises - it’s very hard to penetrate his wall of sound / movement but I will try directing him to some physical tasks and see if he responds.

I have reached out the our GP about taking the tablets earlier - the worry I have it’s that it will then see him returning to unmanageable behaviour in school towards the end of the day but as you say maybe we can look at “top up” dose.

I gave DS his meds (slow release) in bed when he wakes up so that they can kick in before attempting to get him up and ready. We then have cuddles and iPad for 1/2 hour while the meds kick in.

he then has a top up of instant release at school at 2:30 to help with the transition home and the end of day fizziness.

might be worth exploring this with his dr.