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My 3 year old may be autistic

1 reply

Feelingfearful · 03/10/2024 10:16

My DS turned 3 in the last couple of weeks. He’s been delayed in his speech for ages and has been going to private speech therapy since 20 months. Nursery, HV and SALT have all been on the fence with whether or not he should be referred for an autism assessment as he appears to cope fine with routine changes, loves other kids, no obvious stimming, follows instructions and can verbally get his needs met and can answer some basic questions. He doesn’t appear to be a gestalt language processor and is stringing 3-4 word sentences together now but is still behind other kids his age.

Concerns are:

  • Attention and listening - this is nursery’s concern as he can’t sit still for long for things like story time but this has gradually been improving.
  • Sharing - this was nursery’s concern a few months ago but again, this is improving with lots encouragement and praise.
  • Picky eater - likes a fairly beige/fruit diet and won’t touch standalone vegetables but happy to eat them in soup or meals like spaghetti bolognaise. Doesn’t seem to be a sensory thing though, but he definitely is resistant to trying new meals.
  • Slow to pick up on social cues - this is one of my bigger concerns when I watch him interact with other kids. He doesn’t always realise when the other child has had enough of playing and wants to do something else. He doesn’t really understand how to greet them either, he will try to offer them a toy to play with rather than say “hi”.
  • Can’t really tell me about his day so although he’s talking, he’s not conversational yet but I’m hoping this will come as his language keeps developing.

His SALT went in to visit him at nursery yesterday and I’m anxiously awaiting her report. The nursery staff weren’t particularly informative at pick up but mentioned that they were going to be cc’d into the email and they were going to get the HV involved as well which is leading me to think they are now planning on referring him to be assessed for autism.

I’d accepted this might be the case a while ago but I feel so anxious to get this report and read all the things he’s not doing. He’s such a wonderful, happy boy and every time I think he might be autistic it makes me so fearful and worried for his future. Just wondering if anyone had a child who sounded similar at his age and how they are doing now.

OP posts:
ag12345 · 04/10/2024 18:20

Hi I wanted to reply because I could have honestly wrote this post. It’s very difficult place to be isn’t it - the not knowing. My boy is 3 on the 12th. He has lots of words, does put 2 words together and has some 3 word phrases but like your boy, not conversational. We have private SLT involved too and says she think his attention and listening is the issue for the speech delay.
I don’t really have any advice for you but what I will say is this… your boy has some AMAZING skills already to work on. He HAS language that can be built on too. I often say to myself, is my boy has got ASD then I’m gonna sure as hell make sure he’s gonna be ok. You have done everything you can and all the support in place. If you feel you’d like to connect to talk. Feel free to message me and I’ll give you my insta and we could message on there.
lots of love x

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