DD7 I'm so worried about the other 2

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DD7 we are waiting a diagnosis of autism though we personally suspect it's ADHD.

She is lovely a good portion of the time but when she gets nasty she can get really nasty.

We have DD10 and DS2 and I'm so worried she's going to seriously hurt them. She's hurt them before especially her older sister by scratching, hitting etc. she's also vindictive and will destroy their stuff.

Obviously do the best to deal with it but can't watch 24/7 as have to cook etc. bedtime as they share a room is often very very problematic but as only have two bed don't have much choice.

Where can I seek help for the increase of this behaviour? I find it near impossible to remain calm and need some support on how to cope with this.

Thank you.

What support is DD2 receiving? What support is the school providing? Does it include anything to support emotional regulation? Does she have an EHCP?

Have you looked at a DFG so DD2 isn’t sharing a bedroom? In the meantime, can DD2 share your room?

Have you kept a detailed diary to try to spot triggers? Do you have any sensory equipment to help DD2 regulate?

Ultimately, though, DD2 needs more supervision. It isn’t easy, but it is essential to keep everyone safe.

Some people find Ross Greene’s The Explosive Child helpful. Home Start may be able to support you. And, Scope offer mentoring to parents whose DC are undergoing assessment.