School thinks my son has ASD and want a meeting....

[Oncewassmith]

Good morning all I hope I've posted this in the right place. Its come to light that the school believes that my son is presenting classic ASD traits and want a meeting to discuss this. At the moment they haven't provided details of the traits they have noticed, and I just think my son is a bit quirky.

So I need lots of advice if anyone can help;

What are the best resources/books about ASD so I can do some reading around the subject?

What do I need to know before I attend the meeting?

And, what are the key questions etc that I need to ask/make sure are covered at the meeting?

And any other advice/recommendations etc that may help

Thank you in advance

This is not an easy post to answer because you haven't given the age of your DC or details of the type of school/nursery they are in. Probably the best place to look at first is the National Autistic Society website for general information. The autism diagnosis now comes with 3 levels of support and 3 levels of intellectual ability. So the books you need to read depend very much on the sort of sub classification you might eventually get. Understood.org has lots of advice on neurodiverse learners too.

At the meeting with the school you will simply have to be curious and see what they say. Take lots of notes and keep a good record of the meeting. Start keeping records of every conversation and every meeting with any school staff or medical professionals from now on. Keep them even if you are not sure if you will ever need them. They will become your evidence base and you might be very glad you have it. If not, you can toss the notes in due course and nothing will be lost.

If they are suggesting that it is autism get them to confirm that they will be putting your DC on to the SEN Register and putting a support plan in place.
Ask if they think you might need to apply for an EHCP. I felt a bit of a fraud when DS got his EHCP at first. Now it is an absolute godsend as the demands of school only get bigger and he will need extra help. I am so glad we got the requests in early so it only takes a year or so to get help when things go pearshaped rather than 3 if we had no diagnosis or ehcp.... Noone ever really wants to label their child, but the labels that they will be given are worse (lazy, disobedient, stubborn, violent etc) if their needs aren't understood and catered for

Many AS kids are fine in one setting and then not in another so do listen carefully to what school are saying. If your DC is in distress from un-met needs at school then you need to pay attention and getting started on the diagnosis pathway with your local CAMHS. Ask if the school will be making a referral and what you will need to do to support them. If you have to fill in the CAMHS Triage forms take your time (several days on/off) to complete them. Do not rush through. Make sure you fill all the boxes with as much information and as many examples as you can. That helps the professionals to say yes or no. It does help if you have read up on the symptoms to be able to give relevant examples.

Good luck

Thank you so much knottyauty for your reply, sorry I didn't include details (my excuse is chemo brain!) He is 7.5 in year 2 and is at a mainstream junior school, its single form entry which I chose for him as he does suffer from slight social anxiety.

Your advice is great, off to read up on everything I can